Caught Between Love

The first pre-season game was upon us. Max and I had our tickets in hand and we were ready for Penguins hockey.

It was a long and challenging off-season but with heartache comes revival and today was the start of something fresh and brand new, I could feel it. The boys skated on for pre-game warm ups, James without his helmet as usual, his hair perfect while Sid was focused, although letting a few smiles here and there.

The smell of CONSOL and the sounds of freshly zambonied ice was enough to make my insides all warm. Hockey will forever be in my heart, I mean, I practically grew up in a hockey family. My brothers texted me well wishes to pass on to Sid and James but I knew it was a jab at me, another reason to try and talk to the boys.

"They look happy out there. All of them, it makes me so stoked!" Max couldn't contain herself, not only did she love hockey but she also never sat center ice, right behind the bench. It's not my favorite place in the arena to sit, but for Max's birthday, it seemed appropriate.

Players came and went, each of them glancing at us, usually smiling as they skated by. Sid always stretches by the bench and this time was no different. He noticed us instantly, nodding his head and winking as he leaned to touch the tip of his skate.

It was comforting to know that this was how it used to be. I have no relationships with anyone on this team anymore and I felt so relieved to know that I didn't have to walk into to drama when I got home. I still live with Max and she's the most anti-dramatic person I know.

The horn went off and the players skated back into the dressing room.

"Man, I'm craving some serious nachos right now. Do you need anything?" Max stands up, her Penguins jersey hiding her fit frame as she readjusts her pants.

"I got two beers, I think I'm set till intermission." She flashes me a smile and runs up the steps.

I feel my phone vibrate in my pants pocket.

One new message.

J: Saw you behind the bench. Gorgeous as always. Wish me luck out there!

I roll my eyes, typing at a fast speed.

T: You know I hate sitting this close, I don't know where to look!

Within seconds, a response.

J: You're so awkward, Tess, haha. Just look at me, babe, everything will be okay ;)

Babe. That word hit me like a wall. It hurt to read but I was clear with James on my intentions.

T: How about you stop texting me and fix that hair of yours. Looked a bit sloppy out there :)

J: Really? Damn. Enjoy the game.

I closed my phone without responding. Just then 4 fours pile in the seats behind mine, all wearing the women's version of hockey jerseys. I don't understand why they make women's jerseys. A hockey jersey is a hockey jersey, there's no need to sexify it up.

"Those lines were long but an old guy let me cut in front of him. Score!" Max sat down, a pile of nachos in her lap and a beer in her hand.

"James texted me." I said quietly. Max flashed her eyes at me.

"Well, what'd he say?" She prodded.

"Oh the usual. 'You look gorg, babe.' typical Neal."

"Wipe it off. You're at a good place right now, focused on soccer, yeah? I think we all need a break from boys, eh?" Ever since those two weeks in Canada, Max developed the need to say 'eh' after every sentence.

Minutes later CONSOL went black; player introductions began as teams were announced to the ice. The crowd was going crazy, everyone missed the Penguins, it was a season for redemption.

It was the second home game for the Penguins in preseason and it was against the Blue Jackets, the team we won against in OT just a couple nights before.

"Nealer with two assists. That breakup to that whore definitely did him some good." I overheard the girls behind me talking just as the third was about to begin.

Max looked at me, her elbow nudging mine as I tried to ignore the comment.

"Not just Neal though. I heard she fucked with Sid years ago. Total puck slut." Said another. The girl started laughing. How dare they even try to call me that, they don't know me and they sure as hell don't know what happened between Sid, James and I.

Max looked behind us, her hand on the side of my seat. "You girls mind, we're trying to watch the game here."

The girls snickered. "Oh of course."

We had about 3 minutes of play left in the third when Max and I decided to bail early, traffic was terrible post game. Just as we made it to the end of our row, the girls once again showed their attractive colors.

"Hey, that's the chick that fucked Jamesy and Sid!" The petite blonde did a poor job of keeping her mouth quiet because I heard her all the way across the row.

"Excuse me?" I snorted, Max grabbing my arm.

"Don't mind them, Tess. They're not worth it." She muttered.

"No," I said pulling my arm away. "These girls think they know me, Max. Tell me, what's word on the street? I'm a puck bunny? I'm a cancerous whore to the Penguins? You know what, it's just preseason. NO ONE TAKES PRESEASON SERIOUSLY."

The leader of the pact, yet another blonde, came to her friend's assistance.

"At least I didn't fuck two players."

Oh what a comeback.

A middle-aged lady sitting on the end of their row rose up, her finger pointing at the girls. "You know why that is, dear? Because you treat other women like shit. Tess here is an Olympic athlete and a good friend of this team. Who cares if she dated James Neal or Sidney Crosby, it's nobody's goddamn business. But it's women like you that make me sick of the stereotypes women hockey fans have. Show some respect and keep your little mouth shut!"

A few people in our section started clapping, one man patted me on the shoulder in support. The whistle blew signaling the end of the game and players started exiting. I turned to the ice to see James and Sid looking at me confused.

"We gotta go." Max said.

"Thank you," I mouthed to the lady standing next to us as she smiled warmly at me.

We were just about to the parking ramp off to the side of CONSOL when I heard my name being called.

"Tess, wait!" James was running towards us, his purple-checkered suit looking even more atrocious in the dim lights.

"What happened back there?" He caught up to us, barely out of breath. Max nudged my arm.

"I'll meet you in the car." She whispered.

"Did you get into a fight or something?" James looked at me concerned and behind him I saw Sid walking towards us.

"No, just some chick talking trash about stuff she doesn't know." I let out a deep sigh as Sid settled at James' side.

"What kind of trash?" He asked.

"Just calling me names. Nothing I can't handle." The guys just looked at me. Another example of me not knowing where to look.

"Hey nice assists, Nealer. Sid, you tried." The guys laughed, Sid's face blushing. "I should go. See you two around, eh?" They both nodded.

Once home, Max headed upstairs to work on a project due in the morning. I opted to sit my ass on the couch and watch the latest slough of reality TV when I heard a knock at the door.

I looked through the peephole to see my favorite captain.

"What are you doing here?" I ask. Sid was standing firm, his shoulders broad and eyes content on mine.

"Sid?" He moved closer. "What are you--"

In a moment, Sid's hands were on my face, his lips glued to mine. I felt his body relax as soon as we touched and mine tense up. He moved in to the door, my feet shuffling behind myself trying not to fall down. I wrapped my arms around his waist, he responded by doing the same and pulling me closer.

"Tessa..." he breathed through kisses. I pulled Sid off me, grabbing his hand.

"We should go upstairs." I suggested making Sid smile.

"That sounds like a good idea."

Sid lifted me up over his arms and we snuck into my room, locking the door behind us.

That once easy feeling of relief earlier.... well that just went out the window.