Status: I originally posted this on Wattpad and decided to share it on here!
Breakout
Chapter 10
Chapter 10.
It's been two weeks since my brother's funeral. The Blink-182 concert was last week and it was literally the most fun I had ever had in my life. Their songs were pretty good and Alex, Jack, Zack and Rian knew all the words to their songs. It was now Monday morning and I barely had gotten any sleep last night since I had a nightmare about Andrew. I've been getting them a lot lately. I would wake up in the middle of the night with sweat dripping down my face or I would scream. It was strange. Everytime I had a nightmare, I would text Alex. He would instantly make me feel better. I trudged my feet to my locker and turned in my combination. I checked my schedule on what I had after homeroom. Music. I smiled a bit. I shared a music class with Alex.
"Good morning," A voice behind me spoke. I turned around to see Alex, holding in his hands, a flower. A yellow lilly. One of my favorite flowers.
"Hey," I said. "What are you doing with a flower?"
"I found it when I was walking to school this morning since I missed the bus and my car isn't working anymore," Alex sighed. "So I saw it and instantly thought of you. Here you go." Alex leaned forward and placed the flower in my hair, right behind my ear. "Perfect."
"Shut up," I blushed. "Are you guys going to have band practice tonight?"
"Yeah, but probably not for the rest of the week."
"Why?"
"Our label called and wants us to record a song to put on our EP. I've written one but I'm not totally sure if I want it on our EP."
"What's it called?"
Alex pursed his lips. "I've thinking about playing it in music class today. So it's a surprise." Today in music we have to cover a song. Either sing or play a musical instrument. I was going to play "A Thousand Miles" by Vanessa Carlton on the piano and sing a little bit.
"Is it a good surprise or a bad surprise?" I asked.
"Little bit of both."
I nodded just as the bell rang indicating it was time to go to homeroom. I closed my locker and said goodbye to Alex as I was walking to homeroom.
---
"Now who wants to go first?" Our music teacher, Mrs. Wertz, asked the class. I sat next to Alex as he nudged me. I shook my head. I didn't want to go first. The room was silent as the students peered around the classroom to see who would perform. In the back of the classroom, a tiny hand raised up. Sheldon Gatewood. He was the smallest in our grade and sometimes got bullied for it. He was a quiet, silent, kid. I never talked to him but I heard he was fun to talk to. I guess.
"What song are you performing Sheldon?" Mrs. Wertz asked.
"Um, actually I am going to sing," his tiny voice squeaked. Mrs. Wertz raised her eyebrows, obviously surprised by his answer.
"Oh, well, come on up."
Sheldon got up from up out of his seat and walked to the front of the classroom.
"What song are you going to cover?" Mrs. Wertz asked.
"Hit Me Baby One More Time by Britney Spears."
A few kids snickered. Mrs. Wertz glared at some of the kids.
"Sure, go right ahead."
I glanced as Alex. He was trying so hard not to laugh. I glanced back to Sheldon as he got ready to sing.
"Oh baby, baby," he sang. "How was I supposed to know that something wasn't right here?"
A few of the students started giggling and Mrs. Wertz silenced them with her glares.
"I shouldn't have let you go. And now you're right out of site, yeah."
Sheldon sang the whole song and the class awkwardly clapped.
"That was good Shelton. Really good," Mrs. Wertz said. She was lying I could tell. I mean it was a strange performance but it was good. A little bit. After a few more performances from the class, I decided to go. Alex gave me smile before I perched myself on the piano bench.
"Um, I'm going to perform "A Thousand Miles" by Vanessa Carlton. I cleared my throat before singing. I played the intro of the song.
"Making my way downtown, walking fast, faces pass and I'm home bound. Staring blankly ahead, just making my way, making my way, through the crowd. And I need you and I miss you. And now I wonder," I glanced over to Alex who had a surprised expression on his face. I blushed and continued singing.
"If I could fall into the sky, do you think time would pass me by? Cause you know I'd walk a thousand miles if I could just see you, tonight." I played a few piano chords.
"It's always times like these when I think of you and I wonder if you ever think of me," I couldn't help but smile at that lyric. I could relate to it so much.
"Cause everything's so wrong and I don't belong living in your precious memories. Cause I need you. And I miss you. And now I wonder." I smiled a bit before continuing.
"If I could fall into the sky, do you think time would pass me by? Cause you know I'd walk a thousands miles if I could just see you, tonight." My fingers were fearlessly playing the notes on the piano as it came to the bridge.
"And I, I, don't wanna let you know, I, I, drown in your memory, I, I, don't wanna let this go, I, I, don't."
I finished the rest of the song and stood up. Everyone's eyes were on me. I gulped. I must've did a horrible performance. Then suddenly, the whole class clapped. And when I mean clapped, I mean hollered, screaming, cheered, etc. I smiled as I made my way back to my seat.
"Wow, that was seriously amazing, you have no idea," Alex said to me. I blushed.
"Thanks," I smiled. Alex adjusted my flower behind my ear, also brushing a few strands of hair behind my ear.
"You're welcome," he smiled. My heart fluttered a bit. I'm not going to lie and say my crush on Alex hasn't gotten bigger because it has. You have no idea.
"My turn," he said, getting up from his seat and heading toward the front of the class.
"Mr. Gaskarth," Mrs. Wertz said.
"Sandy," Alex greeted. Mrs. Wertz glared.
"Don't call me that."
"Sure thing, Sandy."
I giggled.
"What song are you going to cover?" she asked as Alex headed towards the guitar stand and picked up a guitar.
"Um, I'm not actually doing a cover, is it okay if I performed my own song?"
"That's fine."
Alex stood in the chair in the front of the classroom. "This song is a song I wrote about a girl who I messed up terribly with. She hates my guts now and I wrote a song about it."
I furrowed my eyebrows. What was he talking about?
"It's called Jasey Rae."
My eyes got big. He wrote a song about Jasey. JASEY. A few murmurs from the classmates surfaced across the classroom.
"Lights out, I still hear the rain. These images that fill my head, now keep my fingers from making mistakes. Tell my voice what it takes to speak up, speak up, and keep my conscience clean when I wake," Alex's voice filled the room. I could feel the pain in his voice as he sang.
"Don't make this easy, I want you to mean it, Jasey. Say you'll mean it. You're dressed to kill, I'm calling you out. Don't waste your time on me. Now there's an aching in my back, a stabbing pain that says I lack, the common sense and confidence, to bring an end to promises, that I make in times of desperate conversation, hoping my nights could be better than theirs in the end, just say when."
A million thoughts began racing my mind as Alex sang the chorus. A week after my brother died, Alex went out on a date with Jasey. The same "date" that he took me on. Well, that wasn't a date but still. He said that things didn't work out for them. And I told him he should write a song about it. And that's what he did. I glanced at Alex in the front of the room. His eyes caught mine as he started to sing the bridge.
"I've never told a lie and that makes me a liar, I've never made a bet but we gamble with desire. I've never lit a match with intend to start a fire. But recently the flames are getting out of control. Call me a name, kill me with words. Forget about me it's what I deserve. I was your chance to get out of this town but I ditched the car and left you to," Alex took a deep breath before singing again.
"Wait outside, I hope the air will serve to remind you that my heart is as cold as the clouds of your breath, and my words are as timed as the beating in my chest. In my chest." Alex played the last guitar cord and stood up. I clapped and so did everyone else.
"Wow, Mr. Gaskarth. That was nice," Mrs. Wertz said.
"Thank you, Sandy," Alex said. I smile crept across my face as I giggled. Alex made his way to his seat.
"That was amazing," I said. "But why did you actually write a song about Jasey? You know I was kidding."
"I know but I felt really bad about what happened," Alex admitted. "Really bad."
"What happened?"
A pained expression danced across Alex's eyes. "I'll tell you later okay?"
I was taken back by his expression. "Okay?"
And with that Alex turned and faced the front of the classroom and watched as another student made it's way up and performed a song.
It's been two weeks since my brother's funeral. The Blink-182 concert was last week and it was literally the most fun I had ever had in my life. Their songs were pretty good and Alex, Jack, Zack and Rian knew all the words to their songs. It was now Monday morning and I barely had gotten any sleep last night since I had a nightmare about Andrew. I've been getting them a lot lately. I would wake up in the middle of the night with sweat dripping down my face or I would scream. It was strange. Everytime I had a nightmare, I would text Alex. He would instantly make me feel better. I trudged my feet to my locker and turned in my combination. I checked my schedule on what I had after homeroom. Music. I smiled a bit. I shared a music class with Alex.
"Good morning," A voice behind me spoke. I turned around to see Alex, holding in his hands, a flower. A yellow lilly. One of my favorite flowers.
"Hey," I said. "What are you doing with a flower?"
"I found it when I was walking to school this morning since I missed the bus and my car isn't working anymore," Alex sighed. "So I saw it and instantly thought of you. Here you go." Alex leaned forward and placed the flower in my hair, right behind my ear. "Perfect."
"Shut up," I blushed. "Are you guys going to have band practice tonight?"
"Yeah, but probably not for the rest of the week."
"Why?"
"Our label called and wants us to record a song to put on our EP. I've written one but I'm not totally sure if I want it on our EP."
"What's it called?"
Alex pursed his lips. "I've thinking about playing it in music class today. So it's a surprise." Today in music we have to cover a song. Either sing or play a musical instrument. I was going to play "A Thousand Miles" by Vanessa Carlton on the piano and sing a little bit.
"Is it a good surprise or a bad surprise?" I asked.
"Little bit of both."
I nodded just as the bell rang indicating it was time to go to homeroom. I closed my locker and said goodbye to Alex as I was walking to homeroom.
---
"Now who wants to go first?" Our music teacher, Mrs. Wertz, asked the class. I sat next to Alex as he nudged me. I shook my head. I didn't want to go first. The room was silent as the students peered around the classroom to see who would perform. In the back of the classroom, a tiny hand raised up. Sheldon Gatewood. He was the smallest in our grade and sometimes got bullied for it. He was a quiet, silent, kid. I never talked to him but I heard he was fun to talk to. I guess.
"What song are you performing Sheldon?" Mrs. Wertz asked.
"Um, actually I am going to sing," his tiny voice squeaked. Mrs. Wertz raised her eyebrows, obviously surprised by his answer.
"Oh, well, come on up."
Sheldon got up from up out of his seat and walked to the front of the classroom.
"What song are you going to cover?" Mrs. Wertz asked.
"Hit Me Baby One More Time by Britney Spears."
A few kids snickered. Mrs. Wertz glared at some of the kids.
"Sure, go right ahead."
I glanced as Alex. He was trying so hard not to laugh. I glanced back to Sheldon as he got ready to sing.
"Oh baby, baby," he sang. "How was I supposed to know that something wasn't right here?"
A few of the students started giggling and Mrs. Wertz silenced them with her glares.
"I shouldn't have let you go. And now you're right out of site, yeah."
Sheldon sang the whole song and the class awkwardly clapped.
"That was good Shelton. Really good," Mrs. Wertz said. She was lying I could tell. I mean it was a strange performance but it was good. A little bit. After a few more performances from the class, I decided to go. Alex gave me smile before I perched myself on the piano bench.
"Um, I'm going to perform "A Thousand Miles" by Vanessa Carlton. I cleared my throat before singing. I played the intro of the song.
"Making my way downtown, walking fast, faces pass and I'm home bound. Staring blankly ahead, just making my way, making my way, through the crowd. And I need you and I miss you. And now I wonder," I glanced over to Alex who had a surprised expression on his face. I blushed and continued singing.
"If I could fall into the sky, do you think time would pass me by? Cause you know I'd walk a thousand miles if I could just see you, tonight." I played a few piano chords.
"It's always times like these when I think of you and I wonder if you ever think of me," I couldn't help but smile at that lyric. I could relate to it so much.
"Cause everything's so wrong and I don't belong living in your precious memories. Cause I need you. And I miss you. And now I wonder." I smiled a bit before continuing.
"If I could fall into the sky, do you think time would pass me by? Cause you know I'd walk a thousands miles if I could just see you, tonight." My fingers were fearlessly playing the notes on the piano as it came to the bridge.
"And I, I, don't wanna let you know, I, I, drown in your memory, I, I, don't wanna let this go, I, I, don't."
I finished the rest of the song and stood up. Everyone's eyes were on me. I gulped. I must've did a horrible performance. Then suddenly, the whole class clapped. And when I mean clapped, I mean hollered, screaming, cheered, etc. I smiled as I made my way back to my seat.
"Wow, that was seriously amazing, you have no idea," Alex said to me. I blushed.
"Thanks," I smiled. Alex adjusted my flower behind my ear, also brushing a few strands of hair behind my ear.
"You're welcome," he smiled. My heart fluttered a bit. I'm not going to lie and say my crush on Alex hasn't gotten bigger because it has. You have no idea.
"My turn," he said, getting up from his seat and heading toward the front of the class.
"Mr. Gaskarth," Mrs. Wertz said.
"Sandy," Alex greeted. Mrs. Wertz glared.
"Don't call me that."
"Sure thing, Sandy."
I giggled.
"What song are you going to cover?" she asked as Alex headed towards the guitar stand and picked up a guitar.
"Um, I'm not actually doing a cover, is it okay if I performed my own song?"
"That's fine."
Alex stood in the chair in the front of the classroom. "This song is a song I wrote about a girl who I messed up terribly with. She hates my guts now and I wrote a song about it."
I furrowed my eyebrows. What was he talking about?
"It's called Jasey Rae."
My eyes got big. He wrote a song about Jasey. JASEY. A few murmurs from the classmates surfaced across the classroom.
"Lights out, I still hear the rain. These images that fill my head, now keep my fingers from making mistakes. Tell my voice what it takes to speak up, speak up, and keep my conscience clean when I wake," Alex's voice filled the room. I could feel the pain in his voice as he sang.
"Don't make this easy, I want you to mean it, Jasey. Say you'll mean it. You're dressed to kill, I'm calling you out. Don't waste your time on me. Now there's an aching in my back, a stabbing pain that says I lack, the common sense and confidence, to bring an end to promises, that I make in times of desperate conversation, hoping my nights could be better than theirs in the end, just say when."
A million thoughts began racing my mind as Alex sang the chorus. A week after my brother died, Alex went out on a date with Jasey. The same "date" that he took me on. Well, that wasn't a date but still. He said that things didn't work out for them. And I told him he should write a song about it. And that's what he did. I glanced at Alex in the front of the room. His eyes caught mine as he started to sing the bridge.
"I've never told a lie and that makes me a liar, I've never made a bet but we gamble with desire. I've never lit a match with intend to start a fire. But recently the flames are getting out of control. Call me a name, kill me with words. Forget about me it's what I deserve. I was your chance to get out of this town but I ditched the car and left you to," Alex took a deep breath before singing again.
"Wait outside, I hope the air will serve to remind you that my heart is as cold as the clouds of your breath, and my words are as timed as the beating in my chest. In my chest." Alex played the last guitar cord and stood up. I clapped and so did everyone else.
"Wow, Mr. Gaskarth. That was nice," Mrs. Wertz said.
"Thank you, Sandy," Alex said. I smile crept across my face as I giggled. Alex made his way to his seat.
"That was amazing," I said. "But why did you actually write a song about Jasey? You know I was kidding."
"I know but I felt really bad about what happened," Alex admitted. "Really bad."
"What happened?"
A pained expression danced across Alex's eyes. "I'll tell you later okay?"
I was taken back by his expression. "Okay?"
And with that Alex turned and faced the front of the classroom and watched as another student made it's way up and performed a song.