Tombstone Tourist

Alan had fallen asleep in my arms as I carried him home after sobbing harshly for quite some time. I tried to reassure him, to tell him that he did what he needed to do, but he wouldn't listen. It broke my heart to see him so torn up and so sad.

I opened the door carefully once arriving to my apartment and took Alan back to his room. Gently, I laid him down on the unmade bed, trying desperately not to wake him. As I pulled the covers up over him, he stirred and blinked his eyes open.

"W-where are we?"

"Back at my apartment."

"How did I g-get all the way here? I d-don't remember walking back."

"You didn't. I, uh, I carried you here. You cried for a little while and then fell asleep."

"You carried me all t-the way from the cemetery and up three f-flights of stairs?"

I nodded and he looked shocked yet confused.

"H-how? I'm too fucking fat for anyone to d-do that."

I sat down on the edge of the bed, my heart breaking again at his words. My hand rested on his knee and I looked at him seriously.

"You are not fat, Alan. Not at all."

"Oh what do you know? You're fucking tall and thin and cute and fucking perfect and the nicest guy ever. Of c-course you'd say that."

"I say that because I think and know that. You're not fat, Alan. Do you really think all those things about me?"

"Yes I am! I'm fat and stupid and disgusting!"

He broke down into tears and curled into himself. Making a rash decision, I pulled away the covers and climbed into bed next to him. I whispered love and pulled his shaking body into my arms. He gripped my shirt in fistfuls and sobbed quietly. I rubbed circles into his back and kept him close, praying he wouldn't hate me for doing this once he wasn't so upset.

"No, you aren't. I think you're perfect. I know you're really not, because no one is perfect, but to me you are."

"You're just saying that so I'll stop crying like a fucking pansy."

"No, really, Alan. I'm telling you the truth. That's what I really think. I promise I'm not lying. You're not a pansy."

"My dad al-always said so."

"Well you're not. You're human. You have feelings and emotions and there's nothing wrong with that at all."

"That boy is in Hell, Austin! Not figuratively. Not metaphorically. He's doomed to a life of horror all because of me!"

"It was what you had to do."

"No. I could've just gone back down there and-"

"No!" I snapped. "I mean... uh... a person like you doesn't deserve that."

Alan looked up at me, eyes filled to the brim with emotion. His head tilted to the side a fraction of an inch and, before I could ask him why he was staring at me, lips were on mine.