The Love Abroad

The sign said Dead End.

I can't turn around and go back to the house.

So...I'll just sit here and wait.

Wait until I figure out how I'm going to fix this.

(Tom's POV)

"I can't believe that just happened, I was sure she would say yes." Sarah places her hand on my back, Emma and Rich outside looking for her.

"Maybe she wasn't ready, Tom." I look at my sister whose eyes show sorrow and pity. "But don't you question how much she loves you."

"Marie loves you very much," I turn around to see my mum back from her drive out looking for my runaway girlfriend. "She told me, before we opened gifts. Thomas, my son, she thinks the world of you but perhaps she needs reassurance from you."

I pace the family room, rubbing my head frustratingly. "I tell her everyday how much I love you, how beautiful she is. Sometimes I don't even need to tell her because she can tell when she looks at me," I hide my face from everyone as I lean towards the fireplace. My eyes begin to hurt. "I don't know what to do anymore!"

I pound my fist on the mantle piece; the tears begin to fall slowly.

"Find her. Bring her home."

(Marie's POV)

If Kris were here she'd slap me until I died for being such an idiot. I didn't even bring my phone with me so I couldn't even call her if I wanted to.

I lift myself up and begin walking back the way I came; hoping I'd remember which house was Diana's. The moon lights my path but the temperatures are dropping quickly. I could really use the warm hug of a Hiddleston right about now.

I get to the end of the street when I see a dark figure walking steadily towards me. As it gets closer to the light post, Tom appears looking worried and flustered. He stops in his tracks, staring straight ahead at me. From 20 feet away I can see him wipe at his eyes.

He was crying. I thought. I made Tom cry. I'm such a terrible person.

I was jogging and crying at the same time, closer and closer I got to Tom, the harder I cried. I fall in his arms, he holds me tightly as we collapse to the frigid cement below us. No words - just us, like the many times before - our bodies did the talking.

Finally the silence is broken; with the sounds of Tom mumbling the words I so desperately needed to hear. "I'll never leave you." I try to talk but every time I opened my mouth, my words quivered and were muffled from the tears.

"I love you, forever and always, Marie. I will do anything I need to, to convince you that you are worth the love and attention." His chin on the top of my head, I can feel tears fall, finding the ins and outs of my now stringy hair.

"Why me, Tom? Why is this happening?" I say, pushing away from him staring into his cold blue eyes. "Why do I always try to find the negative in this? Our friendship? Our relationship? Is it so bad that I wish you were flawed, that you weren't the most perfect, kind man I've ever met?" My crying breaks up the tears, which are slowly drying leaving water trails down my cheeks.

"Why is everything feeling like something out of Romeo & Juliet...better yet...a fairytale? Relationships are suppose to be this easy, Tom! WHY CAN'T I MAKE MYSELF HAPPY!!"

My breakdown. An emotional breakdown, one I've never experienced. One I never thought would ever happen. I've succumbed to my lowest of lows; I've reached my doomsday, my kryptonite.

I'm exposed in a way that I've always feared. Someone seeing me at my most vulnerable.

He just sits there looking at me feeling defeated. He holds my hands bringing them up to his lips. "You're afraid to be happy." He says in the most calming voice. "You're afraid to admit your happy, to be in love. To show your love for another," he grabs my face in his hands, his right thumb wiping down the trickle of tears.

"But I do love you, Tom. With everything I have, it's just...I can't...not now." The pain in eyes knowing that I rejected his proposal tore my heart into pieces. "I'm not ready."

It was then I felt like the characters in one of Tom's films. The Deep Blue Sea. I always wondered why I had grown fond of it when Kris first showed me it and now perhaps, the reason is most certain.

I'm a mix of both Hester and Freddie, a self-destructive pessimist who can't seem to give anyone the love they desire. Tom is like the husband of Hester, who simply watches as his marriage falls apart because of the two-sided mind of his wife.

Only there's no marriage.

"We'll work through it. We'll do what we've always done; just have fun and spend as much time together as we possibly can. Marie, I'll wait as long as I need to. There's only one Mrs. Hiddleston card and it has only your name on it."

He kisses me softly, his hands still holding my face.

"Let's go home." I say standing up, wiping the dirt off my jeans. Tom takes his jacket off and places it around my shoulders, his arm around my waist pulling me in for warmth.

The next few days were tense, staying in a house where I bailed after my boyfriend proposed to me. If his family loved me before, well they certainly hate me now.

Knock, knock.

I move my gaze on the door handle, slowly moving in a counter-clockwise motion. "May I come in Marie?" It was the voice of Diana, soft and sweet. "Sure."

She walks in with two cups of tea in her hand. She sets one across from me as she sits in the chair by the bed. "Everything okay?"

Quiet.

Just stay quiet and she'll leave you alone.

"If you think we all despise you, you're very misleading." She says, taking a drink from her cup. I look towards her, my head hurting from all this crying. "I'm not the woman your son needs to be with."

She set her cup down, crossing one leg over the other. "Sure you are," she smiles. "Of all the women Tom has been with, I've never seen him look at them like he does you." I roll my eyes at her statement in disbelief.

"I'm not sure exactly what you're feeling but you need to know that life forgives. Your view on love is screwed from the images of your parent's divorce at such a pivotal age, but not all love is like that. I Hamlet the phrase 'Doubt thou the stars are fire; doubt that the sun doth move; doubt the truth to be a liar; but never doubt I love.' comes to mind.

"Friends that slowly fell into the desires and temptations of cupid's arrow. That's the strongest love the world has ever known. Marie, it's okay to be scared of love, of being vulnerable. But once you let those guards down in front of someone who loves you, it brings you closer together."

I begin to cry again but not in the way I have been trapped inside my room these past few days. I realized that if it wasn't for Tom, for this overbearing need for him to love me, that I wouldn't be the person I am today nor would I have faced my own deep-seeded fears.

"So what do I do?" Diana scoots next to me, her hand grabbing mine like a mother comforting a daughter, "Tell Tom everything. Follow your heart dear, not your mind because in your case if you listen to your mind, you'll never be truly happy."

The question remains: Do I have what it takes to be a 'Mrs.Hiddleston' or will I fall flat on my face for the whole world to see.

It's not going to be easy but it sure beats chastising myself for ever letting him go.

Counting in my head how many versions of 'I want to marry you' would be useless because there's only one way to say it clearly.

"I want to marry you, Tom."

The mirror doesn't answer me back. This isn't a Disney movie where someone is trapped inside the mirror and talks to you, being all wise and shit.

This is reality.

And reality is hitting me hard. Life is hitting me hard. Love is hitting me hard.

Though he promised things wouldn't change, they have. Tom and I, well, we're no longer who we used to be. He's not who he used to be. I can't blame him, I mean, I did reject him.

Sort of.

Like Diana said, I need to listen to my heart for once, just let that do all the talking. Right now, it's telling me to walk downstairs, grab Tom and plant a large kiss on his delicate lips while mouthing the words "I'll marry you," breathlessly through our gasps for air.

Easier said than done.

After a much needed change of clothes, I take one last deep breath before I face my harsh reality.

You can do this, Marie. It's all you. I mumble to myself.

The walk downstairs feels like the big entrance a girl makes when revealing herself for the first time to her date on prom night. All eyes are on me.

Emma, Sarah, Rich, little Maddie and even Diana shares eye contact with me before exiting the room. All is left is Tom and I.

Alone.

"You're finally down from your chamber of darkness," he says sarcastically. I stand behind him, placing my hand gently on his left shoulder. "Can we talk, Tom? Please?" He stands still, no words escaping his lips.

An eerie silence falls in the room.

I swing around him, looking directly in his eyes. "Tom. Please. Babe, let's just talk. Let's fix this. You promised things wouldn't change, you--" He grabs my face, pulling my mouth onto his. His warm tongue spreading my lips apart - waiting for its entrance.

A kiss is what I wish. And a kiss is what I got. Only not as elegant as I had imagined.

"Don't ever lock yourself away from me again." he says looking into my already swollen eyes. Just looking at the emotion and disparity on his face makes me just want to breakdown. "I promise, I won't."

He grabs me by the hand, leading me out into the frigid Oxford air. We sit on a patio swing that settles right in front of the large window on Diana's cottage. His body is directed towards mine with his left leg resting on the seat of the chair with his right one dangling.

"Marie, I--" I put my finger to his lips, silencing his whisper. "Let me do all the talking?" I ask sweetly. He graciously nods his head, grabbing my cold hand in his.

"Tom, I'm a stupid girl," I begin, noticing Tom about to speak I give him that 'don't-you-even-talk' look. "I could go on forever about how mental I've been and how crazy my theories are about this relationship but I don't want to go through that emotional rollercoaster anymore."

I gather my breaths before continuing. "I love you. I've never been this in love before and I admit - it scares me shitless. I never imagined that I would meet you, fall in love with you, want to marry you, but I am. It's happening right now."

Tom's eyes begin to redden, his breath forming a cold cloud from his mouth.

"I don't think I'll be the most perfect wife, the one you've imagined. Nor do I think I look well enough to be accompanying you on a red carpet but damn it, I am and I will. That's my spot. We've been through a lot these past 7-8 months and we've bonded in ways that are more than physical."

Without even having the say it, Tom knew how much he really meant to me. He's one of my best friends. He's the guy who you can always count on, someone you can call no matter where you are. He'll find a way to be with you if you're in trouble and if he can't make it, he's the type of guy who'll never forgive himself for it.

I always tried to picture his as someone who has a double life, who hides his flaws. But the more I get to know him, to be with him, I realized that his biggest flaw was caring too much for the people closest to him.

He's said many times how he wouldn't be where we was or who he was if it wasn't for his friends and family. He'll do anything for them.

Tom's the kind of guy who’s not afraid to meet your friends or you parents. He loves to include you in outings with his friends and his perfect date is just sitting at home watching a movie or playing a board game. He's never let this instant rise to fame affect his life and the person he is.

He's the same old Tom who just lives an interesting life.

"Tom, I would be honored to be your wife, if you'd still accept me." I wipe the tear falling down my cheek, my fingers bright red from the cold. Tom grabs my hands, squeezing them tightly before lifting them to his lips. He kisses them.

"Like I've said before. There's only room for one Mrs. Hiddleston. And you're the one that gets the title. Always and forever." Grabbing the box that's been in his pocket the past few days, he places the engagement ring on my finger. Tears begin sliding down my cheeks as he leans in kissing me, our lips thawing at the touch. I bury my head into his chest, his arms wrapped around my frame.

Walking back into the house, everyone erupts in cheers and claps. Diana giving Tom a kiss on the cheek while Emma and Sarah embrace me in a hug before admiring the ring. "Welcome to the family, Marie." Diana says as she kisses my cheek.

I excuse myself into the kitchen where I begin placing a phone call to my parents informing them of the good news. "I'm engaged," I say to my mom and dad who are on speakerphone. I can hear my mom crying and mumbling every celebratory word in Spanish. Tom sneaks up behind me, his arms wrapped around my waist.

"Remember our promise, Tom. Take care of my daughter, it's up to you now." Tom smiles as he responds positively to my dad.

So this is what it's like? Being engaged?

It wasn't like how they portray it in the movies, all joyous and perfect the first time but even a couple days later, the feeling is sinking in.

I'm Marie Lucas, 22 years old and engaged to the greatest man in the world.

His name?

Tom Hiddleston.