Punk Rox!

I walked back from the studio alone. Jess and the others were tying up the loose ends and my manager demanded I be back before nine o’clock. I wasn’t sure why I had a curfew, but I assumed it had something to with the fact that they all thought I was completely insane. They were probably afraid I’d hurt myself or something. Hell, I was afraid I was going to hurt myself.

Well, you have been talking to yourself for the past five days.

Oh, shut the fuck up.

I sighed quietly as I made my way back to Jake’s apartment. That’s where I promised John I’d meet back up with the guys even though he was back home with his family several miles from there. We weren’t going to be seeing our manager again for a month or two until we start touring again. Maybe occasionally he’ll stop by the studio, but otherwise, he’ll be home or wherever he ends up.
I then started thinking about why I didn’t take my car instead of walking. Walking sucks. It’s boring. But at least I get to people watch.

You’re walking because I told you to take the car, but because you’re a bitch, you thought you’d be smart and walk instead. Dumbass.

Oh, yeah...

You know what? Fuck you.

Ooh, I’m scared!

You should be! I could just jump right into traffic and kill you. Problem solved.

Are you retarded? That would kill you, too!

Well, I was tested for mental retardation when I was a teenager...

Wait, really? The voice began laughing uncontrollably. I actually was, I was tested for mental retardation when I was in highschool. But it came back negative. I was just uninterested in what was going on at school.

I knew you were SPECIAL! AHAHAHAHAHA!

I rolled my eyes and kept walking. I’d gotten used to him over the past several days. I ignored the weird looks I got walking down the street and made fun of people in my head. It was a lot more fun now since someone was talking back and throwing comical insults alongside me. Inside me? That sounded weird. Not sexually! You’ve listened to me for a while, you know what I mean...

Oh, that is too funny!

Yeah, har-har...

Come on, Andy! Be amusing!

Don’t call me that...

Your name? Okay, how’s Bat-tarded then? I mentally growled, it wasn’t long before the voice figured out my love of Batman, and now that he knows I was tested for mental retardation he’s going to have blast coming up with demeaning nicknames for me.

Aw, come on Batboy, how about we talk about Jess.

Jess? Why?

Well, would you rather talk about Heath? Having his big dick in-

No!

AHAHAHA!

What the hell?!

Well, now that I have your attention, let’s talk about the small one.

Jesse?

Yeah.

I inwardly sighed, Why?

‘Cause you know you want to! Okay, what the fuck is he getting at?

Not really, no...

Liar! You know like him. The voice purred, I fought myself from groaning out loud.

I’m not gay, goddamn you!

How about bisexual?

I actually contemplated this possibility. I was trying to ignore it, blaming it on stress or my new found insanity, but I think I am attracted to Jess. I don’t know why, I know I’d never been attracted to another guy before and I was extremely confused, but Jesse was...cute.

I see you’re thinking pretty hard about this...

Go away! I growled out loud, glad no one was around to hear it. I was thinking and he was ruining my train of thought! But I wasn’t sure if I really wanted to think about it. I figured I was going to have to address this at some point if it kept going the way it was, but I didn’t want to think about it, not now, not ever, really.

Whoa, meow. The voice purred inside my head as some slut wearing an extremely tight, red leather mini skirt that was two inches away from showing everything, and a top to match walked passed. It looked like it was three sizes too small for her and made her big fake tits pop like firecrackers, to be dramatic. I found myself mindlessly staring as she walked away, her red stilettos clicking the pavement and her bleached blonde hair swinging across her back.

Whoa, whoa, whoa...back up.

You said “meow.” I thought you were gay!

You. Are. Hopeless. I’m you! You’re attracted to that, I’m attracted to that. You’re attracted to Jess, I’m attracted to Jess. And vice versa, quite frankly.

Holy...shit... It still didn’t make complete sense, but definitely placed a lot of pieces to the puzzle together.

Yep, now, keep going, it’s almost ten.

WHAT?! I pulled out my phone in a panic and saw the time was 9:56pm.

Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck! The others were going to send hunting dogs after me if I didn’t get to Jake’s and fast! I took off down the street, pushing passed regular drunks, hookers, ravers, partiers, and just some normal pedestrians on their way home after a night out.



I trotted up to Jake’s apartment door, his girlfriend, Ella who had been leaning over the railing, stood up straight when she saw me coming. I guessed she was sent to be the lookout for crazy-ass’s arrival... Me...

“Andy, there you are, where’ve you been?” She asked, worry edging its way into her accent. She probably knew all about my insanity through Jake.

Watching sluts stalk the streets.

“Walking...did you know it takes longer than driving?” I joked, she shook her head, but a smile played on her lips.

“Come on, the guys are waiting,” She opened the door to the apartment and I was immediately hit with the scent of alcohol and pizza.

“Andy!” Jake literally came out of nowhere and jumped me.

“Good to see you again too Jake,” I attempted to push him away, but Ashley came up and pulled him off for me.

“Where the hell have you been? I feel sorry for your parents when you were a teenager, you clearly have no punctuality at all. Do you not understand what ‘curfew’ means? We said nine o’clock! It’s twelve passed ten!” He scolded, I shrugged, a half guilty and half apologetic expression on my face.

Sorry, mom...

Shut up...

“So, Andy, were you, uh, with your little friend?” CC started snickering before even finishing the question and he and Jake burst out laughing. Jinxx soon joined them and an amused smirk came to Ashley’s face.

They’re talking about you, you know...

Yeah, ‘cause I’m just that famous. I rolled my eyes at him, but it looked like I was doing it to them.

“Well, the important thing is that you’re here and safe so, take this,” Ella handed me a bottle of whiskey, “and keep the misfits company,” She smiled and went into another room. She soon came back out with a jacket and her purse, kissed Jake and left.

Wonder where she’s going?

Do you really?

Nah...

“I guess Ella’s right... You’re lucky I have to agree with the pretty girls,” Ashley walked away, leaving me staring after him incredulously.

I shook my head, plopped down beside Jinxx and stole a piece of pizza from one of the boxes on the table. We didn’t really do much I could remember in the morning, but we hung out, laughed, joked and watched some bad movies. Oh, and got drunk. That’s the big one. Really drunk.



I woke up on the floor, head pounding and ears ringing. It took a few seconds for it to process in my head that it was my phone ringing - not my head. I fumbled with my pockets for a while before finally reaching my phone and looking at the screen.

Parents Calling

Read the ID. My parents? Fuck did I do this time? I pressed the talk button and held the phone to my ear.

“Hello?”

“Hey, Andy,” Came my dad’s voice.

“Is there a reason you’re calling this early?” I questioned.

“Andy, it’s almost three in the afternoon there...” I lifted myself onto my arm and looked at the clock on the DVD player. 2:52 read the glowing blue numbers.

“Damn, I was drunk...” I thought out loud.

“What?” I didn’t realize I still had my phone up until my father spoke.

“Uh-uh, nothing, I was just thinking...out...loud...” I purse my lips and shook my head as if to say, What the fuck?

“Okay?” I could tell he suspicious.

Worst excuse...EVER.

Oh, go to hell!

“Well, I’m calling to make sure you’re alright.”

“I’m fine, Dad, thanks,” I reassured him, if not a little confused.

“Can you talk, or are you busy?” I looked around me, Jinxx was fast asleep on the couch next to Jake and CC was out cold across their laps. Ashley was passed out a few feet away from me on the floor.

“Uh...I think I can spare five minutes...”

“Okay, I don’t want to keep you, I know you’re coming down soon and I just want to make sure you’re alright,” He worried, I knew that, and he had a right to. I mean, I may be possibly insane, but I thought I could handle myself well. Well enough, anyway.

“Yeah, Dad, I’m fine,” I repeated, trying to sound as nonchalant as I could. With the drunken emptiness gone, all my worries were coming back. Mostly, it revolved around Jesse and the fact that I’m actually hot for another guy.

“I know, you already said that,” I heard him sighed on the other end of the phone, “Your mother and I, we worry about you, you know that. We just want you to be happy and safe.” And here we go... I huffed and lay back down onto the floor.

“Just be careful, Andy,” He told me, taking note of my slight irritability.

“And,” He spoke before I could answer, “If you ever need to talk-”

“I know, I can always call you or Mom,” I repeated almost like it was rehearsed. In a way, I supposed it was.

“Alright, be safe, and I’ll talk to you later, son.”

“You too, Dad,” We said our goodbyes and hung up the phone. I stared up at the ceiling, thinking. “I can always call you or Mom,” the words skipped through my head like a broken record. Maybe I should talk to my mother about this. The whole Jesse thing.

Aren’t you’re parents Catholic? Wouldn’t they spray you with holy water or something for going against “God’s Will?”

My parents aren’t like that. And what about God’s Will? Fuck His Will! Love is beautiful no matter what form it’s in. Love has no gender, preference or bias.

That was actually pretty gay, dude.

Shut up. Just shut up.

Wait, wait, wait... You love Jess?

What? No! I was just saying that there’s nothing wrong with gay love. That’s all!

No reply came in return.

Bite me, asshole...

Don’t you have a girlfriend?

I paused.

Aw, shit.