Learning to Live

Walking out of the house was simple, no one cared where I went, or what I did, as long as it didn't affect their lives. After all I was given money once a month for what I would need, but besides that I was either told to stay in my room or get out of the house, being un-needed was nothing new to me after all this time.

It used to hurt me, that my mama and her new husband didn't want to spend time with me, but learning the hard way that when they did spend time with me it ended up badly, I started to avoid it all together, it has been going well for the past for weeks now, I think they have forgotten that I exist. That's the way I like it. I like people not knowing I exist. Because sometimes I don't want to exist in a world full of hurt and pain.

Grabbing my skateboard as I exit my house just so that if I decide school isn't for someone like myself or there are no people I can potentially fit in with I can just skip. Skateboarding is always something I have turned to when I had nothing else, it was like a rush or a high, a legal one that no one could take away from me. I had other more illegal highs, but no one, not even my ex best friend knew about these things. You could say that I am good at hiding things about myself I do not wish people to know.

I can see the new school in my line of vision, and I wish to god that I don't have to go here. It's my third school in less than a month, and I doubt I will stay here long enough to even remember anyone's name, but as I am turning the corner into the school gates I can see a group of boys sat outside smoking and laughing, dressed just like me. They all seem to be happy, content that they are breaking the school rules. These are people that I would happily make friends with.

I enjoy being friends with people that are 'outcasts' or 'badass' I guess it's just because I myself am a trouble maker and love to do things such as I could think these people would also enjoy. But first I must get to know them, maybe just maybe if they think I am nice enough or they are nice enough I could make pretty quick friends with them and get one or all of them to show me around the school that I still haven't so much as glanced at since I saw this group sitting outside.

Skating up towards the group, which I can now see consists of four boys, I stop just in front of them, deciding to show off a little and doing a grind on the pipe in front, landing with a front flip, something effortless, but a high all the same. Looking towards the boys I can see that they are looking at me in awe, and I inwardly laugh. I love when people react this way to me.

The one who looks the eldest makes conversation first, before I even have a chance to sit down he's jumping up and grabbing my arm tightly, dragging me closer to the group. "That was sick, I'm Ronnie. This is Derek." He points to the boy who is slightly larger than the rest and has longer black hair. "Ron." A shorter boy who has what I seem to think is a cigerette hanging from his mouth, his hair is also black but much shorter and more styled. "And this is Ryan." The boy who is pale to the extreme and has perfectly styled black hair. I could be friends with these people.

"I'm Jacky. Jacky Vincent. And I am here purely to fuck shit up this year."