You Know That I'm Right.

I took a deep breath and tightened the grip on the bench under me. I'd wanted this for so long, since I was fifteen and could only dream about it. But now I had actually gotten myself off my ass and was ready to do it. It might sound stupid and irrational, but I had always wanted a septum piercing. I wasn't 18 yet and my mother would kill me but Serena had forced me inside the shop when we had walked past and here I was, silently happy.
"You ready?" the tattoo'd woman asked and I smiled and replied simply with a yes. I closed my eyes and grabbed my bottom lip with my teeth lightly.
"You're doing it babe!" Serena always called me various nicknames directed to couples. The people in the shop must think we're in a relationship. Maybe it didn't help the stereotype that Serena was dressed in a floral dress and me in a pair of distressed jeans shorts and a old t-shirt with a Sonic Youth print, something I'd found after my dad died. I was the boyish lesbian and she the girly one. I held back the laugh at how unfitting that was for Serena with her parade of boys in school and even here at the mall.
"Oh hey Alec!" Serena's happy voice fills the room as I'm paying for my new piercing. Alec? He had just walked into the shop and looked up confused from his phone. First he only saw Serena, like always, but then he noticed me, smiled and waved.
"Sonic Youth, nice choice." he had reached his way to us two and took out his earplugs. I looked down at my shirt and felt stupid. I knew few of their songs, dad and I usually hadn't had time to talk about music when I got old enough to really enjoy it.
"Oh, um. It was my dads, I only know a few songs."
"Better then no songs." I noticed Serena had moved away to look at some pictures at the counter. She met eyes with the cashier and shared a sentence and quick laugh. I looked back at Alec and smiled with a nod. "So I guess your dad has really good music taste."
"I assume so." It was hard to think about dad. I tried to push the thoughts away most of the time if I wasn't alone. Nobody talks about dad with me, it's too personal and only Serena is close enough to ask, but she doesn't because she knows she can't understand the way I wish she could. Her parents are happily married, like mine were despite their big differences. Dad was simple, mom complicated, like me. We're not a good match when it's just the two of us. We crash into arguments daily. She's constantly trying to make me into this perfect daughter in a desperate attempt to have the daughter mother relationship she had always wanted when I was born.
"I guess he's not around anymore?" Alec brought me out of my clouded mind.
"He died six moths ago." it was the first time I had said it out loud and it hurt in my chest. I took a deep breath and straightened my back. "How did you… did Nick tell you or Serena?"
"I've barely spoken to Serena, and… you just looked sad and I guessed." he scratched his neck and looked over my shoulder. "I should maybe do what I was supposed to do, it was nice talking to you Blake." he moved past me and walked up to the cashier telling her he had an appointment. Serena was by the door waiting for me by now.
"He's so cute, go get him girl." she bumped my shoulder and wiggled her eyebrows up and down quickly.
"Oh please, we're friends… barley."
We started walking toward the nearest clothing store Serena wanted to look inside. I was trying to save some money but Serena could buy whatever she wanted, and she did. But she also bough me a necklace with a little B handing from the delicate gold chain.
"Just a little thank you for being my friend." sometimes Serena was too much, but I could never complain, everybody should have someone like her in their life. It wasn't her fault I was a jealous bitch who's confidence was a bottomless dark pit with no substance.
"What's the matter, you're looking down. Want some frozen yogurt? My treat." Again, almost too much but never enough.
"No it's not anything." I was shutting her out again. "Alec asked about my dad I told him."
"Really? Well that's good." silence settled between us. "Frozen yogurt it is, we can eat on the way home to me then order pizza." I raised my eyebrow at her and she sighed and rolled her eyes. "Or we can make actual dinner."
"That's the spirit!"