You Have My Attention

Previously:

Because I was occupied desperately trying to push the thought of leaning in and kissing the older boy out of my head, I didn’t realise I was actually staring at him.

I knew he’d caught me staring and was about to start apologising when he did something that sent my heart racing; he started leaning in towards me…

~

I felt as if my heart literally stopped beating for a second as his lips gently grazed my skin, not my lips as I’d like, though, but my ear, where he’d leant in to whisper something.

Fuckity, fuck, fuck, fuck! I thought he was going to kiss me! Boo!

“We should do this more often…hang out… just the two of us” he whispered, his warm breath a stark but welcome contrast to the cooling night air.

Trying to keep the frown of my face, I quietly agreed and hoped that I didn’t look disappointed; it’s my own fault, really; I shouldn’t have got my hopes up and let myself believe something as unlikely as that could happen.

“That’s good, because I’ve really enjoyed tonight. There’s one more thing I want to do though, in order to make it perfect” he continued, still murmuring softly but slightly further away from my ear so that we were eye to eye. I maintained the contact, lost in the pools of blue which were his eyes; they glistened like diamonds in the moonlight – bright, intense and enhanced by the eyeliner that was perfectly applied.

“What?” I asked gently, so acutely aware his face was only centimetres from my own. I could smell the tantalising mix of coffee and cigarettes on his breath and noticed how it entwined with the gorgeous scent of his body wash. Damn, why did he have to smell so good?!

“This” and then he kissed me, slow and gentle - it had meaning.

How cliché it would be to describe the sensation by saying that fireworks went off in my head. Of course, it wasn’t that far from the truth.

Above us, fireworks still exploded and lit up the sky – a perfect setting for a perfect moment, if you ask me.

That moment right there, that was the happiest I’d been in a long, long time, and as Andy gently laid us back against the Batman blanket, it felt natural to lie on top of him as we kissed - chest to chest and our arms locked around each other.

Though people may say I made to big a deal over a kiss, they don’t understand. The few kisses I’ve experienced were never about love, or emotion, or anything meaningful; this had meaning, though, and that made it the only kiss that counted.

As our lips moved in sync, I shut my eyes gently, letting myself focus purely on the feel of Andy.

I couldn’t tell you how long we kissed for, for I lost track of time (easily done in that situation, let’s be honest) but I know that by the time we decided to break apart for longer than a few seconds, the fireworks had finished, it was very dark and I could barely see Andy, despite him only being in front of me.

It was one of those situations were words didn’t need to be spoken, lest they break the blissful peace that had settled over us, so, wordlessly we began our descent of the ladder, entwining our hands once we were both on the ground again.

What we did share instead of words, though, was a private smile, one full of joy and content as we boarded the bus as silently as we could, not wanting to wake the others, who were all crashed out in their bunks.

I guess we were gone longer than I thought then if they’re all asleep!

In the bunk alley, Andy gently tossed his Batman blanket into his bunk while I discarded my hoodie, t-shirt and jeans and changed into some loose fitting, grey pyjama bottoms. Andy followed suit after and changed into – you guessed it – Batman pyjama bottoms. As quietly as possible, he slipped into his bunk, leaving me standing in between the bunks rather awkwardly before Andy decided to speak up.

“Lukass, you realise you can come in with me, if you want?” he whispered, sounding almost shy as he pulled the bunk sheets back slightly. Not needing to be asked twice, I slid in next to him, feeling warm inside as Andy shuffled closer and wrapped an arm around my waist, pulling me closer to him so that we were spooning.

He was so lovely and warm, like a soft hot water bottle against my back with long hair the gently tickled my neck. After whispered goodnights, it was time to go to sleep, leaving the discussion of what we were now until tomorrow.

Funnily enough, I found myself thinking that I wouldn’t be able to sleep like this, the Dr Suess quote coming to mind –

“You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.”

Still, Andy – judging by his even, shallow and steady breathing – was already asleep, so, in order to spend more time with him, I’d have to wait until tomorrow, and, in the process, sleep.

And that is one solid reason my mind found itself craving sleep.

The other was that it was late and that tonight had been tiring with a lot going on, I didn’t mind one bit though.

Before I drifted off into blissful sleep, one last thought crossed my mind.

One of the most amazing events of my life took place earlier on the top of a tour bus and now, I was feeling like I was on top of the whole fucking world.

That’s what I call the Andy effect.

He has a way of making you feel incredible and boy, did he do that.