A Few Heartbeats Away From Disaster

"Karmen, please call me back."
"It's not what you think it is, babe. Wow that sounded bad... Just call me?"
"Karmen you can't ignore me forever. If we're done, fine, but you have to at least tell me."

I was listening to Mike's voicemails as I drove down to San Diego. I didn't know how I was going to find him, since I had never been to his house, or what I was going to say, but I knew I had to do something. I had about thirty messages and my heart broke more and more with each one. I was sticking with my plan of not telling him, regardless of what Alex said.

I texted Justin earlier to make sure that he was still okay with keeping secret about the whole thing and he claimed to still be okay with it. What happened between us was nothing and we both knew that, even though we're still best friends. I never even thought about maybe ending up with Justin. I knew that it was Mike and I knew it would stay that way. I like to think that Justin knew that too.

I got to San Diego and decided to go to the place that it all started. I drove to the beach, parked, and layed out on the sand. Part of me expected Mike to walk up, lay next to me, and just hold me. I knew that he wouldn't though. He probably still think's I'm at home in Palo Alto fuming at him. I could text him, but I don't know what I'd say. There was an option though that I'd been rattling around in my brain.

I pulled out my phone and pulled up my twitter app. I know Mike was following me and still is due to the numerous direct messages he's sent me. I clicked on the blue button to compose a message and wrote a cryptic hint- that way if he understands he'll find me and if he doesn't he won't. I'm leaving it up to the fates.

'Sometimes you have to go to where it all began, to understand where it all went wrong.'

As soon as I sent the tweet I shut my phone off and layed in the sand. What if Mike decided that he didn't want to be with me after how terribly I've treated him the past few days? I didn't give him a chance to explain. I didn't try to see his side. Gosh I just hate myself sometimes.

"Are you okay?" I looked up when I heard a voice and was face to face with... a random stranger. I wiped the smile off my face as I realized the mystery person wasn't Mike.

"Oh.. Um yeah, I'm just waiting for someone." I said standing up.

"Well maybe while you're waiting we could go get coffee?" I felt myself cringe as memories of Mike flooded my head. I denied his offer quickly.

"Um, I'm flattered but it's really important that I stay here."

"Well I could wait with you?" He asked winking.

"No thank you. I'm actually waiting for my boyfriend." He scoffed at that and I gave him a puzzling look. "I'm sorry, I don't get it...?"

"I know who you are, hun. I know who your boyfriend is. And let me tell you, you're gonna be waiting for a while." I found myself taking a step back, shocked at his sudden change in attitude.

"I'm willing to take the risk. Thank's for your concern." With that he scoffed again and walked down the beach. What did he mean 'I'd be waiting for a while'? I shrugged it off and sat back down. I don't know how long I sat there but I was getting sick of waiting. Maybe Mike had moved on. Why would he want to wait around for me anyways? I'm no prize. I was just about to get up and head home when I felt my phone vibrate.

"Hello?" I said answering the call from the unknown number.

"Karmen? It's Jaime." The person on the other end said. How did Jaime get my number? And what did he want?

"Um, no offense Jaime, but why are you calling me?"

"You can't wait for Mike to come to you. He thinks you're still mad at him. He thinks you want to be alone. You need to go to him."

"That's a grand idea, Hime, except I don't know where to find him." I muttered into the phone standing up. Why did Mike have to be so stubborn?

"Well if you'd give me five seconds, I happen to have the address to his appartment. Or did you forget we're best friends?" I could hear his signature smile creeping into his voice as he spoke. When I got back to my car he gave me the address and I punched it in the GPS. After about 10 minutes I was sitting in Mike's driveway.

Still unaware of what to do or say, I shut my car off and slowly peeled myself off the seat. I walked slowly to his front door and knocked timidly. I don't know what I was expecting, but a shirtless Vic definitly wasn't it.

"Oh shit, uh, hey Karmen." He said. He was sweating and had some suggestive bruises along his neck. He saw me eyeballing his lovebites and blushed deeply. "Um I didn't think you'd be here. Mike is in his room, it's uh, I'll show you."

"Vic who was it?" I heard a voice come from down the hall. It sounded male but not like Mike, it sounded more familiar than Mike. I wasn't left wondering too long though when the figure came out, at least he was fully clothed.

"Kellin?!" I asked as he walked out. So much for being at work! "Alright then. I'm scarred. Where's Mike?" I turned to Vic who was now beet red. He pointed to a door awkwardly with his thumb before pushing a petrified Kellin back into what I assumed was Vic's room.

So here I was. Standing in front of Mike's door. What was I going to say? What was he going to say? What would happen to us? Will there be an us? I suddenly became really angry at myself. If I had given Mike a chance to explain we wouldn't be in this situation. If I had given him the benefit of the doubt everything would be fine. But no, I had to ruin it all.

I guess now I try to fix it.

"Mikey?" I called as I knocked quietly on the door. He didn't answer so I tried the doorknob, which easily turned and I walked in to see Mike sprawled out across his bed, slightly drooling. I couldn't help but giggle as I walked in and shut the door behind me. I also couldn't help but walk over to the bed and lay down next to him. "Mike, wake up." I said brushing a stray piece of hair from his face. His eye's fluttered open and I he smiled before grabbing my hand.

"Am I dreaming?" He mumbled before rolling over and putting his arm around my waist.

"That was cheesy even for you." I said as he pulled me closer. I nuzzled in to him and sighed. "No you aren't. But Mikey, we have to talk."

"Mmhmm, we can talk later." He said, still half asleep.

"No Mike this can't wait." I said pulling away a bit. He opened his eyes to give me a puppy-dog face. I looked back strictly and the look fell. He rolled over onto his back and stared at the ceiling.

"I love you." He said. "I just wanted you to know that before you did whatever you have to do."

"You're not going to explain it to me? Not going to tell me what happened?" I sat up and gaped at him. "But it wasn't your fault! She kissed you! You're supposed to tell me that and then I can forgive you and then everything can be happy again!"

"So you already know?" He smiled at me. "I figured as much."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means I know you Kar. You're stubborn. The only way you would come down here is if you knew that it was going to go well."

"But what if it doesn't go well? I mean I fucked up! I didn't let you explain or give you a chance and I ignored you and-" Before I could say anything else he was sitting up and kissing me. I was startled at first until I realized that he wasn't mad at me. He didn't blame me for anything. I smirked a little and kissed him back, wrapping my arms around his neck. He turned us over so he was laying on top of me and pulled away.

"You didn't mess anything up. Nothing's messed up. Everything is perfect. Because now you're here and I'm here and I'm happy and I sure as hell hope you're happy and I could not imagine anything being better than this." He said littering my face with kisses. I laughed and pushed him off of me.

"You're amazing." I said smirking at him.

"And you're-"

"Let's go to a party!" Vic crashed into the room- now fully clothed- with Kellin standing sheepishly at his side. Mike groaned and threw a pillow at his brother.

"Knock much?!" He shouted at Vic, who just laughed.

"Shut up and put some real clothes on. Jonny has a concert tonight and he invited us. We're gonna go see him and then we're gonna go get wasted. It's gonna be fun." He threw Mike's pillow back at him and shut the door.

"Jonny? As in... Craig?" I gaped at Mike. He just nodded like it was no big deal.

"Yeah, but we don't have to go. We could just stay here and...." He trailed off and rolled on top of me, kissing me again.

"Oh no!" I said rolling us over- which wouldn't have been possible had I not caught him off gaurd. From my new position I pinned his hands to the pillow and glared down. "A Jonny Craig concert and alcohol? There's no way we're missing that." I crawled off of him and headed towards the door.

"Is that the only reason you date me? Because of the celebrities?" He smirked at me.

"Of course not!" I said opening the door and walking into the hallway. Before I walked away I poked my head in to say one last thing

"You forgot the alcohol"