We Haven't Got Long, but We've Got Enough

“Oli love, where are you going?”, I heard the sleepy voice of my fiancé coming from upstairs. Has the thought of being with someone forever ever scared you? Scared you to the point where you can't think about anything else? Footsteps were coming down the stairs. I waited. Waited in the dark hallway of the house I was sharing with my fiancé of three months, Sam.

I didn't turn around until he approached directly behind me, “Just... you know I was going for a walk”, I came up with an extremely lame excuse, “Couldn't sleep and didn't want to wake you up so I thought I could as well walk around a bit... you know this helps me sleep...”, at least this wasn't a lie. I've always been thinking a lot. Sometimes I get so caught up in my thougths that I can only fall asleep when the sun rises again.

Sam gave me a concerned look, “Are you alright?”, he asked softly. I just nodded, “Will you let me go now?”. There was his concerned look again, “Sure”, he despite said, “I love you.”. I hesitated before pulling him in a hug and placing a soft kiss on his cheek, “I love you too.”, I then whispered and earned a little smile from him, “Go back to bed.”, I added, before letting go of him and grabbing my keys and my jacket. I'd already put my shoes on before he came downstairs. Before I closed the door, I turned around one last time. Sam was still standing in the dark hallway. I probably shouldn't leave him, not like this. But I felt like I had to. I smiled again, closed and locked the door. I felt relief as I stood outside and took a deep breath, before making my way down the street.

The house I went to was well-lit. Of course it was. Why would he wait in the dark for me? I quickly made my way to the front door that immediately opened as I rang the doorbell. I couldn't help but smile, “Hey babe”, he greeted me. “Don't call me babe, Josh.”, I said, knowing he would do it again anyway. Actually I didn't mind. It just took our relationship to a whole new level if I would ignore him calling me babe. It would make look like I was his boyfriend. I wasn't his boyfriend, “We don't have much time.”, I quickly informed him while already walking into his house, “We don't...?”, Josh asked, while already wrapping his arms around me from behind and kissing my neck, making me close my eyes. Hell, I loved when he did this. Of course he knew. He knew me well.

“I woke him up.”, I never called Sam by his name in this kind of situation. The only answer I got was a sigh. I felt sorry. My text from 15 minutes ago promised him more than just a quickie. To be honest I wanted more tonight too. Josh kissed my neck one last time before taking my hand, “Let's not waste anymore time we can spend otherwise.”, he said while dragging me with him.