I Want Crazy

The sheets were messed up. Tom's hair was just as frenzied. Her attachment to Grey was as strong as ever. Especially physically and at that present moment. Tom was straddling Grey in her bed, clinging to his fully clothed body, practically for dear life.

Grey's hands cupped Tom's face when they kissed feverishly, just as they always had. He thought it was his own way of showing her he cared.

After a few more moments, Tom quickly realized where things were headed and she stopped instantly. She rolled off of Grey’s lap and sat against her headboard, breathing heavily. Tom shook her head with her eyes closed.

Grey looked over at her. He was breathing heavily as well, but he had a huge smile plastered on his face. “You okay?” Grey asked, in between breaths.

“I’m sorry.” Tom said.

Grey furrowed his brow. “What have you got to be sorry for?”

Tom scoffed, trying to brush the knots out of her hair with her fingers. “This is hard for me, you know? Trying not to have sex with you.”

“I know that.” Grey laughed.

“And apparently, you’re just taking it as some big joke.” Tom accused, getting out of her bed. She went over to grab her brush as her fingers were not making good progress on her hair. “I’m not complaining that we’re not having sex. I promise.” Tom tried to reason. “I think I’m just not used to it. And I’m trying to stop myself before you have to stop me.”

“You don’t - ”

Tom slammed the brush back down on her dresser and turned towards Grey sharply, making him stop his statement. “You keep telling me that I’m better than a one-night-stand or whatever, so I’m trying to be that. I’m trying to keep this going; keep this working.” She gestured wildly between the two. “But do you know how hard it is when you come in here, looking like you do with your stupid, messy hair and that look?”

“What look?” Grey asked with an amused grin.

“That look. That you have when you’re looking at me.” Tom said vaguely.

Grey eyes shined as he shook his head at her.

“There it is!” Tom pointed at him.

“There is no look.” Grey said, humor written in his voice.

Tom groaned. “There’s a look. You just don’t see it like I do.”

“Tom, will you just come back here and sit down.”

“I will not. I cannot occupy that close of a space with you anymore. I’m trying to be strong, but I can’t when you’re being so…”

“So what?”

“So...fucking Grey.”

Grey laughed, he pushed himself out of the bed.

“Shut up, asshole.”

“Tom, sit down.” He ordered.

“No.” Tom said, shaking her head, stepping away from him when he came closer.

“Tom.” Grey reached for her.

“Grey, stop it.” Tom pulled herself away from him.

“Reagan!”

Tom looked back at him, shock on her face.

“Sorry, I know.” Grey said. “It’s Tom. I know that. But…” He approached her slowly, grabbing her hands in his.

Tom was so confused by his outburst that she had let him.

“But I’m trying to tell you something really important.” Grey looked deep into her eyes. He used one hand to push a few stray hairs out of Tom’s face and put behind her ears. “We’ve been dating for quite a while now.”

“I guess.”

“Trust me. Three months is a while, even for me.” Grey joked. “I can’t seem to keep a girl for much longer than that. I’m surprised as all hell you’re still putting up with me.”

“Keep this up, you won’t have to be surprised for much longer.” Tom threatened.

Grey laughed quietly, knowing she wasn’t being serious. “Look, I’ve been thinking…” He trailed off for a second. “These few months, getting to know you and learning so much about you have been so great.”

“But…?”

“There’s no ‘but’. It’s just that.” Grey countered. “And I know you’re not that sentimental or probably wouldn’t care as much, but Friday is exactly three months from the first time we went on a date. And I was thinking we could do something really special.”

Tom smirked, catching on. “Special?”

Grey nodded. “There’ll be dinner at a really nice restaurant, maybe dancing, if you want.”

“So, we’re just going on a date?” Tom said, defeated. That was not the direction she was hoping Grey would go.

“Maybe.” Grey shrugged. “Of course, we could always forgo dancing and do some cardio of our own.”

“Knowing you, you probably mean hitting the gym.” Tom rolled her eyes, pulling away from him.

Grey immediately grabbed ahold of her waist so that she couldn’t go anyway. He was shaking his head as Tom watched his head tilt down to nibble on the side of her neck.

As soon as Grey’s lips touched the underside of her jaw, Tom sighed. Loudly. “You need to stop.” Tom warned softly.

“Okay.” Grey laughed, holding the sides of her neck and placing his forehead on hers. “So I’ll stop now, and then Friday night…” He kissed her and then resumed his position. “Friday night we’ll have a wonderful dinner followed by - ”

“Sex?” Tom interrupted, excitedly.

Grey smiled. “Yes.”

“Like really good sex or like, slow, sensual sex?”

“Uh…” Grey thought, dropping his hands and taking a step away from Tom. “It can’t be both?”

Tom furrowed her brow. “I don’t know. Can it?”

“Well, I can certainly try. So, Friday is three days from now.” He went Tom’s mini-fridge to grab a couple of root beers for them.

“Great observation, Mr. Walkner.”

“Do you think you can resist me for three more days?” Grey joked, handing her a bottle.

Tom shrugged. “I made it three months, haven’t I?” She uncapped her root beer and held it out to him to clink their glasses together. “By the way, if you call me Reagan again, I’ll be forced to punch you in the face.”

!@#$#@!

Problem was, Tom had a very hard time lasting just three more days.

On day one, she couldn’t stop thinking about the fact that they’d finally seal the deal. It was different for Tom this way. She hadn’t yet decided if she liked this new way of doing things. Tom loved the relationship that she had with Grey, because it was easy. They understood each other and very rarely fought. At this point, sex with Grey seemed like a reward for her for making it this far. As long as the wait was worth it, anyway.

On day two, Tom became extremely self conscious. That day, she scrubbed every inch of herself during her shower, for fear she had even the slightest residue from the other men that she had ever slept with. Tom’s number was high. And while neither of them ever put a specific number out there, she was certain Grey’s could be counted on one hand. Grey was noble, respectful. He wasn’t one that would sleep around just for the sake of sleeping around.

On day three, Tom was nervous. Three months of establishing a relationship with one man. Three months of learning every single detail about one man. Tom had learned where he was from (Dover, New Jersey) and his siblings names (Lila and Reed, both were older and married with kids of their own). She learned who he went to prom with. On one occasion, Grey commed his parents just so they could speak to the girl who had their son’s affections. After all of that, it was like, this night was the deciding factor of whether or not their relationship would continue. Tom was scared.

“Tom!” Daisy Mae voice boomed through Tom’s ears and she was snapped out of her trance.

Tom turned around sharply, seeing Daisy Mae standing there, still in her cadet uniform. Tom furrowed her brow. “What?”

“You do realize that Grey is comin’ to get you in an hour?” The roommate asked, her thick country accent coming through.

Tom looked down at her wrist to look at her watch. “Shit.” She gasped. “I could’ve sworn it was earlier.”

“Well, how long have you been standing in front of your closet, staring at it?”

“I’m not sure.” Tom said, frantically trying to dig through it. She had nothing to wear, nothing that would be appropriate for a nice dinner and tonight’s activities. “Urgh!” Tom groaned loudly, slamming the door to her closet.

Daisy Mae jumped. “Hey!” She said, getting in front of Tom to calm her. “Alright, listen to me. You obviously need my help. And you’re lucky because I don’t have another shift for a couple hours.” Daisy Mae went to her own vanity to turn on her curling iron.

“It’s overnight right? You won’t be back tonight?”

“I should be back tomorrow afternoon.”

Tom sighed in relief. “I don’t know what to do. I don’t know how to do this.” Tom stared off at the wall as she mumbled her words.

“Honey, you have been sayin’ that since you and Grey started datin’. You’ve made it this far, but right now you have to listen to everythin' I say.” Daisy Mae stood in front of Tom, forcing her to look in her eyes. “Grey likes you. Really likes you. Tonight, no matter how it goes, will be a lovely steppin’ stone for y’all.”

“What am I supposed to wear? I have nothing to wear.”

“Yes, you do.” Daisy Mae went to Tom’s closet and dug deep into the back of it. She pulled out a blue knit dress.

“I can’t wear that.” Tom insisted. “Jim made me buy that.”

“Jim made you buy it, because it’d look great on you. Which is why you have to wear it tonight.” Daisy held the dress out to Tom. “Put it on.” She ordered.

“But - ”

“I told you to listen to everythin' I said, did I not?”

Tom looked up at Daisy Mae, surprised by her forcefulness. She nodded slightly. “You did.” Tom said quietly.

“Then you do as I say.”

Tom nodded again, stripping herself of her plain clothes and trading them out for the dress. She had to admit, it did fit very well. Tom looked at herself through Daisy Mae’s full length mirror and spun around to look at herself through all angles.

“Great.” Daisy Mae said, approaching Tom and grabbing her by her shoulders. She led Tom to her desk chair and sat her down. Daisy Mae held up the curling iron to Tom. “No, I’m gonna curl your hair. I’m almost certain you’ve never done this before.”

“You’d be correct.”

“Good. Then tonight is going to be great.”

It took Daisy Mae nearly forty-five minutes to even lightly curl Tom’s long hair. This left just enough time for the brunette to add a small amount of makeup, much to Tom’s dismay.

“DM, I don’t - I really can’t do this.” Tom said. “What if he thinks I look to different? What if he hates my hair? What if he hates the sex?” Tom gasped. “Oh, my gosh, what if he finds out that I had sex with Jim more than just once. I can’t do thi - ”

“Tom, stop!” Daisy Mae shouted. There was a moment of silence between the two before Daisy Mae spoke again. “He doesn’t know that you and Jim were a thing?”

“We weren’t a thing. And no, he doesn’t know. I couldn't tell him. Grey already knew that I was...experienced. I didn't need him knowing about Jim."

"There's nothing wrong with what you and Jim did. At least not in my book."

"I know that. But Jim and I are so complicated. I wanted grey to know there was, and is, nothing going on between us on an emotional level."

Daisy Mae raised an eyebrow to her friend. "Are you trying to convince me or yourself?"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing." Daisy Mae said quickly, lying through her teeth as she did. She couldn't go down that path with Tom. Not right before her big date. Daisy Mae would ask again later.

The door to their room chimed and Tom's heart immediately stopped. She looked up at Daisy Mae, fear in her eyes.

"Daisy Mae, I can't do this. I really can't. This was a stupid idea."

"What happened to the girl I met on my first day here? That girl was confident. She could take on anythin' in any way. That Tom, she was probably the first person that was ever upfront and honest with me. You’re probably the bravest person that I know.”

Tom shook her head at Daisy Mae’s words.

“Comin’ out here, years behind the rest of us, and you’re makin’ it.” Daisy Mae promised her. “You are brave. And strong. You can handle a night with this guy.”

The door chimed again.

“Respond.” Daisy Mae commanded. “Just a second. Still finishing up some girly things.” The brunette turned her attention back to Tom. “Now, take a deep breath.”

Tom followed her roommate’s directions, standing to her feet, putting them into a pair of flats that Daisy Mae had put in front of her.

“You look great.” Daisy Mae went to her own closet and pulled out a long black coat. “Being its the middle of December, you probably shouldn’t be out in the cold in short sleeves.”

Tom took the coat from Daisy Mae. “Thank you.”

Daisy Mae scoffed, shaking it off.

“No, I’m serious. I was a mess. Thank you for helping me.”

“You’re so welcome.” Daisy Mae smiled.

Tom looked at her roommate for another minute. “Would you mind if I...hugged you?”

“Are you kiddin’? Of course you can!” Daisy Mae agreed enthusiastically, hurrying towards the girl to hug her. “Let’s just be careful with your hair.”

“Now, you’re sure you won’t be back until noon?”

“I’m sure. And if I get off early, I will go crash with someone else so you can have the room.”

Tom smiled, holding the girl for another second before pulling away. “Wish me luck.” She said.

“You won’t need it.”

“Thanks.” Tom pressed the button on the panel next to the door and it slid open. She smiled up at the man standing in front of her, noticing him in his attire.

Grey was in a dark green button down and a black jacket with the pants to match. He noticed her dress. “You look wonderful. I like your hair like this.” Grey said, playing with a strand of it. “And your dress…” He let out a long breath.

“Calm down, there, Romeo.” Tom joked, starting to put the jacket on.

“Here, let me help.” Grey said, grabbing her jacket and holding it behind her so Tom could slip her arms in.

When the jacket was on, Tom felt his fingers run across the back of her neck as he pulled her hair out from under his jacket. She shuddered. “Thanks.” Tom said quietly.

“You ready?” Grey asked her, holding out a hand, asking for hers.

“As I’ll ever be.” Tom admitted with a sigh.

!@#$#@!

Tom felt soft kisses being planted on her bare shoulder. She rolled over from her side to her stomach in order to escape the kisses. Instead, they only intensified, moving to the middle of her back or across the back of her neck. “Stooooop.” Tom groaned into the pillow.

Soft laughs followed her complaint, however the touches still didn’t stop. A hand started to massage at the muscles on her lower back.

“I’m trying to sleep here.” Tom mumbled.

“Really?” Grey asked. “You don’t want to go again?”

“Time?”

The man shuffled around to check the clock on Tom’s bedside table. “It’s a little after two.”

“In the morning?”

Grey turned back over, wrapping his arm around Tom’s back. “Yes.” he whispered into her ear before softly biting at the lobe.

Tom grumbled, and turned her head to the side to look at him. "Listen, if you really want to do more of this cuddling and sleeping together thing, you should know something."

"What's that?"

"I like my sleep."

Grey laughed.

"So much, in fact, that I normally get at least a full eight hours every night. Unfortunately, you're currently fucking with that."

"I'd rather be fucking you."

Tom gasped, turning onto her back to better look at him. "Grey Walkner! Did you just curse?"

"It's known to happen every now and then."

Tom rolled over, touching her chest to his. "I don't like it when you curse."

Grey looked to her in confusion. "Why not?"

Tom shrugged, leaning her chin on his chest. "It's just not you."

"Not me?"

"Well, yeah. You are Grey Walkner. You're practically the epitome of the perfect guy." Tom joked. She held a finger up to him when he went to argue. "You are! You are probably the most respectful man I have in my life, besides my father. You introduced me to your own parents, which had never happened with me. You refused to have sex with me on the first date and then actually gave me a good reason why.” Tom laughed. “And I'm not saying it’s a bad thing that we waited this long, because it was probably the best thing that could have happened to me. Actually getting to know you has been incredible.”

Grey had shied away, blushing, not that Tom could see well in the dark.

“You're a good guy, Grey. And that's really new for me. It's weird for me to think about.” Tom admitted. “But I like you. For who you are and not just because I met you at a bar and needed to hook up.”

Grey smiled up at Tom. “Good.” He put a hand on the side of her and guided her towards him for a kiss. “You know I like you, too, right?”

“Of course I do.” Tom replied. “I know that for a fact. I’m nearly impossible to deal with. However, you’re still here.”

“So are your other friends.”

“They’re different.”

Grey shook his head. “I don’t see how. I’m pretty sure Daisy Mae helped you get ready tonight because she cares for you. Leo’s always helping you with your Med stuff. Jim helping you with...everything else.”

Tom looked away from him at the sound of Jim’s name coming from Grey’s lips. She nodded. “I don’t want to talk about them though. In fact, I don’t want to talk at all.”