Synthetic Love

I hadn't visited Ricky. It's hard, dealing with the fact that the guy you care a lot about- love even - doesn't know you. Doesn't care.

It killed me.

Sleeping was not an option. I would have nightmares about Ricky. Different stupid things. Like, me seeing the car crash of him telling me he didn't know me again.

I hadn't gone to school.

I hadn't spoken to Vannah or any of the guys. They had called and texted but I ignored them like the plague. I couldn't face them or even speak to them knowing what I knew.

My decision had been made the day Ricky said he didn't know me. It wasn't that hard a decision. It would sting a while but not going through with it would sting worse.

Life would be better. I know it will be. So much more for me awaits in my future.

0o0o0

I waited until a day when I knew I would be home alone. Ricky's mother went to visit Ricky again.

I pulled my duffle bag from the closet shoving what few belongings I had into it and zipping up the bag. I went downstairs,'sitting on the couch and I waited.

I couldn't help but think about the decision I was making. How it would effect everyone.

It didn't take long for the doorbell to ring. I got up and opened it, the person I had been waiting on was standing outside.

Violet.

We met at Warped Tour, three yeas ago. We talked a lot after. She knew more about me than most. She lived in California. She went to a performance arts school and she lived on the beach. She was around my age, still in high school but she lived in a huge studio apartment by herself.

She had been begging me to come live with her, get away from my dad, go to school with her and see Cali.

I didn't want to mooch off of her but she always insisted that she had enough money to support a football team.

Her dad ran Sumarian Records. Of course she had enough money. With new bands like Asking Alwxandria signing to them, they of course would be getting a lot of payment.

I called her, though. Finally taking up on this offer.

I had to get away from all this. Away from Ricky who didn't know me. I would be going to the complete other side if the country and I still felt like that wasn't far enough.

Sure, I was being cowardly but I never said I wasn't a coward.

Violet smiled. "You ready? Plane leaves in an hour."

"Yeah, of course." I grabbed my duffle bag. "I've been ready."

She laughed. "I was a little surprised you took my offer up. You've always been so against it. What made you change your mind?"

"I'll tell you about it later."

"What about Vannah. She was your best friend, did she do something to you?"

"No, if anything, I'm doing something to her."

0o0o0

Over the course of the 10 hours I had been gone, I had gotten a bunch of worried text messages and calls from Vannah and Ricky's Mom. I knew that if I wanted to forget I would have to cut my phone off.

Violet's apartment was spacious, two bathrooms, two bedrooms, a huge living room with a huge tv, complete with xbox, games, movies etc. a nice kitchen and a balcony.

It was amazing to say the least and it was exactly what you would expect a California beachside apartment would look like.

Violet pointed me toward a bedroom in the back and I made my way there. I threw my bag down and looked around.

The king sized bed, walk in closet, a window, black walls, hard wood floor, a dresser, and a bedside table with a lamp. It was much like my room at the Olson's house.

I slowly began to unpack my things. I hung my clothes up, put away my shoes, etc.

It didn't feel like home yet but I knew it could. It would. It had to.