Summer and Frost

The summer I came of age was the most beautiful of all the Asgardian summers I could remember before it. It was the time when I was the most powerful. I was the goddess of summer and fire, the embodiment of heat and long days, blue skies and sun-kissed skin.

Thor and Loki mock-fought in the field while I basked in the sun, loving the feel of the sun on my face. The past few years had seen many changes in Thor, and he was now a tall, bulky warrior with a voice like the thunder he controlled. He was now capable of growing a beard that could rival Odin’s although he chose to keep his trimmed. Truly the thunder god was starting to live up to his name.

Although Loki was my age, years younger than Thor, I started to notice changes in him as well. He was taller, more lithe instead of just gawky and long-limbed. He was quick witted and playful, growing fonder of playing tricks with every passing day. His face had thinned out, and his green eyes grew more piercing in their perceptiveness as he matured. Sometimes he was so angry it frightened me.

He was not like his brother, who boomed his disapprovals and bellowed whenever he was upset. Loki kept his anger close to his heart, and I watched it change the dear boy who had always been my friend.

I had always been close to the God of Mischief. While I had my own fiery, passionate side, which Thor always appreciated, I enjoyed Loki’s wit and his way with words. Summer was the playful season, and I enjoyed playing games with Loki, especially at the expense of Thor’s trusting nature.

I knew why Loki had grown angry, why he sometimes looked at his older brother with what I sometimes swore was hatred. Loki was rapidly growing tired of being treated differently than Thor. Thor was always given a better place at the dinner table, Odin always counseled Thor and not Loki, and from a very early age it became clear that it was Thor Odin was grooming for the throne and not Loki.

I never understood why he was treated differently, not until later on that summer night.

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After dinner was finished, I gathered up the skirts of my golden gown to head back to my chambers. I was shocked when I was pulled back into a darkened hallway, and hand clapped over my mouth, and flames danced in my fingers, ready to defend myself against my attacker when I was spun around to face a familiar face. I barely touched Loki with a fiery finger, his hand recoiling from my mouth as he swore a little, a smile still on his face.

“I didn’t mean to startle you, Nina,” he said, his voice saying my name in the special way only he said it.

“Of course you did, Loki. You enjoy trying to provoke me.”

“I see it worked,” he said, pointing to my hand, which was only now stopping with its glow of fire. “I have something to show you,” he said, taking my hand in his, which was always much cooler.

He easily tricked the guards standing watch at he end of the hallway before the double doors, and we slipped inside the cavernous hallway. It was dark, and Loki pulled me closer to him as he guided me down the steps. I tried to beat down the blush the crept into my cheeks at being close to him. My hand was on his wiry muscled arm, and I tripped on the uneven edge of a step. He caught me quickly, and the feeling that rushed through me when he kept me in his arms even after he had righted me was enough for every hidden unlit torch in the darkened hallway to blaze with flames, lighting his face only inches from mine.

He smiled at me before he took my hand in his once more, leading me down the hall. We said nothing, but there seemed to be an unspoken understanding between us that nothing needed to be said about it.

He showed me all the wonderful relics kept in the vault, spoils of war from other worlds, and the empty pedestal here Mjolnir used to sit, before it was given to Thor by Odin, a sign that he was to become king one day.

The last relic was the most exciting and terrifying. I could feel its power from where I stood feet away while Loki approached it.

“The Tesseract,” he said. “When my father defeated the Frost Giants, he took their source of power, and it has been guarded here until this very day.”

He laced his hands on the handle around the cube, and when he gasped, I rushed to him. I turned to grab his hand, to remove it from the cube, and was burned.

It wasn’t the burn of fire. Fire could not harm me. It was he harsher burn of frost’s bite. I clutched my hand as I looked at Loki, and shook my head in disbelief. “Is this a trick?”

Loki’s now red eyes bored into mine with a shock of their own as he held his hands up in front of his face. They were the cold blue of Frost Giant skin, and the furrows in the skin on his face made him look foreign to me.

“If you tell anyone, I will kill you. I will reach into your heart and watch it freeze, Nina.” This time he said my name like an evil threat, and I found myself running away from him.

The guards appeared startled as I burst through the door. They had been tricked so effectively that they hadn’t realized anyone was even in the vault.

I rounded the corner as quickly as possible, nearly tripping on my skirts.

And then I ran headlong into Odin Allfather.

He smiled at me. “There you are, my dear. Frigga and I have been meaning to speak to you about an important matter.”

“Of course, Allfather,” I said, curtsying like a proper lady of Asgard and trying to hide the terror that brewed within me.

I followed Odin into his private study, where Frigga waited, sitting on a lounge in a cream colored dress, looking regal as always.

“You grow more lovely every summer, Nina,” she said as I entered the room, nervously adjusting the braids in my blonde hair.

“You are too kind, your majesty.”

“Please, do sit,” she said, patting the empty space next to her. I obeyed, sitting down and Odin stood in front of us.

“We have been watching you since you were but a girl, and have encouraged your association with our son, Thor. You care for him, do you not?” Frigga asked.

“Of course. I love both of your sons dearly. They have always been my closest friends.”

“Then we hope this will be as exciting to you as it is to us,” Frigga said, smiling warmly at me before gesturing for Odin to continue her speech.

“Thor will soon be king, and he will need a wife at his side to counsel him and help him learn what it means, not only to be a good king, but a good husband. We could think of no greater candidate than you, Nina.”

“I am flattered by your request, but I wish to know, why me? Thor will not take kindly to you choosing a wife for him, and I am closer in age to Loki than Thor.”

“Tell me, do you harbor a special interest in Loki?” Odin asked. He was no fool when it came to the feelings of his subjects.

“More than you do, Odin. You claim to love both of your sons equally, but you treat Thor as if he is more special. As if Loki is not your son. Tell me, why did you not tell Loki of his true parentage?” I asked boldly, no longer bothering with titles and what was polite in the company of my ruler.

“He was abandoned during the war as an infant. I adopted him, hoping that one day he would help us bring about permanent peace between Asgard and the Jotuns.”

I was disgusted with my king in a way I never thought possible. I rose from my seat, fighting back the flames of anger that threatened to spill forth. “He is not an instrument for peace. He is a scared young man, and he deserves to be loved for who he is and not whom you wish him to be. Don’t dishonor him by making him another object you brought home from war. You should be ashamed of yourself.”

“Did he not threaten to kill you if you spread this knowledge?” a deep voice boomed from the doorway. Heimdall stood in the doorway, his all-knowing eyes staring into mine.

“Is this true?” Odin asked, aghast.

“He did not mean what he said. There is an anger in him that frightens me at times, but he has never treated me ill. He is my friend, and I his. And as such, I know that he is tired of being treated differently than his brother.”

“He is my son-“

“But you have always shown Thor more love! And it has not gone unnoticed by Loki. You have been cruel. I cannot sit back and watch Loki go down this path. I cannot be a part of a life where I am groomed to marry into a family that treats a son differently simply because he is not of the same blood. I could not bear it.”

“I think it best you leave then. Your knowledge will only hurt Loki, and I cannot risk others learning of his true heritage.”

“Odin, you are a fool. You will bring about nothing short of war if you continue to treat Loki this way. There is a darkness in him that someone is going to have to answer for, and if you’re not careful, that someone will be you.”

Heimdall knew this would happen, and that night he escorted me to the gate on the bifrost, where I left Asgard. I could not stay without being able to right things and try to better Loki’s situation. All I could do was leave. Loki did not need me, and he did not need me to make things worse by trying to fix things myself.