Can't Shake You

Letting out a sigh Koti closed her text book, it was her last year of college; it should be exciting but was missing a big piece. The NHL was locked out, the brother she never wanted but was stuck with anyway: Tj Oshie and the person she cared more about then she should: Patrik Burgland were back home spending time with family. There was something about Patrik being home in Sweden, not hearing from him that scared her, Koti couldn't shake the feeling that she would never get the chance to talk to him, what little hope she had in September slipped further away every time more games got cancelled.

Making a cup of coco Koti grabbed a hoodie and sat down on the window bench seat to watch the snow falling outside. Instantly she was hit with the smell of Patrik, boy and ice, which brought a tear to her eye. Winter break was a few days away, her favorite time of year to spend with him. Wiping away a tear she thought back to last year.

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Koti had just finished her last final; it was time to grab her packed bag before heading to the Burgland/Oshie residents. Decorations had to be hung, cookies to bake and bet off all a month worth of home games. Over the past few years of their friendship it had become a tradition; the spring didn't allow it due to playoffs and superstitions.

First thing on her list was cookies, a healthier version that didn't drift too far off the hockey diet, to use as a barging chip to get the boys to put up the tree. Over the month Koti decorated, convinced Patrik to get recipes from his mom she could try and make, saw San Jose, Columbus, New York, Dallas, Nashville and Phoenix come to town. She even started a few snowball fights and had yet to win one.

Once again school returned and spring was approaching faster than anyone anticipated. Playoffs and finals started leaving less and less time for Koti and Patrik to spend time together, less time for Tj to pick on her. Tj claimed it was having. A sister that clued him on to the fact Koti was falling for Patrik, she didn't believe it. Her finals were done with just in time for the second series to start. Sadly the Blues were never able to figure out the Kings causing them to get swept. Koti spent a week with Patrik, they explored places around town, one weekend even found them on a spur of the moment weekend getaway to shore of Lake Michigan. After that weekend Patrik headed back to Sweden and Koti started an internship needed for school.

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"NHL cancels games through Jan. 14, raising total to 625 (51 percent of season)."

Koti looks at the alert on her phone and lets out a sigh. If she had any hope left it was now gone. Opening a new text she pulled up TJ's sending him three words -it’s not fair- she didn’t expect anything back, the last he heard from TJ was a happy thanksgiving, the fact that the two were in same country was the only reason she figured they kept in slight contact. Getting up from the ledge, rinsed out her mug and placed it in the dishwasher. With a stretch Koti made her way to bed, she had an early morning ahead of her, starting to put the last three and a half years of work to use volunteering and the local children’s hospital.

By the time January rolled around she was spending all her time at the hospital, getting all her books ready for the final semester and sleeping. In the mix of everyday life Koti had managed to lose her cell phone and while waiting for new one to come I the mail missed the announcement and plenty of text that the lock out had ended. It was the night of January 9th. Classes were set to begin in a few days and she had stayed late at the hospital working out her schedule for the next few months. It didn't register in her mind when she unlocked her front door that it was already unlocked, it took walking into a hard, warm, 6'3" body to notice anything was different. Koti let out a scream trying to push away but Patrik held onto her tight trying to come down.

"Get off me asshole" she pushed herself back and this time he let her while he kept trying to calm her down

"Shh Koti, take a breath please"

"Are you trying to kill me Patrik" she tried to give him her angriest face “I don't know how they do things in Sweden but breaking in and scaring the living crap out of me is not okay"

"I tried calling you, left a message" he took a breath "I'm sorry for scaring you, I didn't mean to. I thought you knew."

"Knew what?"she held her hands up "I lost my phone a few days ago and the new one only came today I have no idea what message you are talking about" kicking off her sneakers he went about putting away her stuff.

Patrick watched her move about thinking about what he wanted to say and how to say it. He may have known her for a few years now but there was something about the girl standing before him more often than not had him second guessing himself.

"Knew I was coming here, right from the airport" he reached out pulling Koti into his chest "I messed up. I should have talked to you more and not let the lockout come between us. I was angry"

Koti looked up at him “I had no control over that. Not hearing from you hurt and made me realize something. I rely on you to much and no one knows how much longer either of us will be in town. You should go"

Pushing out of his arms Koti headed for her bedroom listening for him to leave. She was being stubborn and refused to open herself up to the chance of feeling like she did during the lockout again. In reality she was hurting them both more by hiding her feelings. For the time being Patrik let Koti have her way while trying to find the right way to convince her to give them a chance.

A week later Patrik still hadn't heard from her when he was on the way home after beating the Redwings 6 to 0. The radio was playing softly in the background when a song caught his attention.

I should have kissed you, I should have pushed you up against the wall, I should have kissed you, Just like I wasn’t scared at all

Turning around he drove in the direction of where Koti lived, Patrik wasn't going to let her go without a fight and figured out what to do. He was going to get his girl.

Koti had just laid down in bed after spending the day working on homework. She was exhausted, hearing the knock she groaned and got out of bed. Looking threw the peephole she sighed before opening the door "What Patrik"

"You should have been there tonight celebrating with the fans when I scored a goal....." Reaching out he rested his free hand on her cheek "and then you should have been down in the family room after the game so I could do this." He leaned in placing a soft kiss to her lips. For a moment Koti hesitates before returning the kiss. He pulled back and whispered against her lips “I am not wasting any more time then I already have waiting for you to realize what your heart is trying to tell your head. You are special and I fell for you a long time ago."

Koti buried her face in his neck so he couldn't see her blushing "I didn't know until you were gone how much I fell for you and then I couldn't shake those feelings no matter how much I tried, not that I really tried to either."

"Give us a chance Koti, please" he looked down at her, leaning back a tad so she couldn't hide her face.

"Okay" leaning onto her tip toes she gave him a gentle kiss and a smile.