These Four Words

Kellin's POV

A few months passed by and he still tried to contact me but I ignored him every time. Katelynne knew something was wrong but I kept brushing it off, saying I was tired and it was kind of true since we were recording the next album and I spent most of my days in the studio. As much as I wanted to take Vic out of my mind, I couldn’t… he kept appearing all the time.

“Are you ok, man? You seem very distracted lately.” Jesse said with a concerned look on his face, he knew me better than I knew myself.

“Yes, just a little bit tired lately. Don’t worry.” I said, trying to smile it away. I was making my way to the recording booth when he grabbed my arm, pulled me out of the studio and away from the guys.

“You can’t lie to me Kellin, something’s really wrong. I’ve never seen you like this, not even when the whole thing with Jessica exploded.” I kept staring at my feet, not knowing what to answer. “Does it have anything to do with your trip to San Diego?” I opened my eyes wide and looked him straight to the eye this time.

“What are y-you talking about?” I stuttered and he looked me in the eyes with a sympathetic look.

“You know that your credit card is linked to the band’s e-mail, right? We get e-mails every time any of us buy something.” I sighed. “Please tell me what happened.”

“I went to see Vic and told him about Katelynne’s pregnancy and he didn’t take it really well.” I said while playing my hands nervously. He knew the whole thing going on between Vic and myself, he had known from the very beginning.

“I should’ve imagined that.” He paused, looking for the right words to speak. “You knew you were playing with fire, but you kept doing it anyway.”

“I know that, Jesse. I just never thought she would get pregnant. I was planning on breaking things off with her when we came back from tour.” I said getting overwhelmed and feeling tears ready to spill out of my eyes at any moment.

“This is going to break your heart a lot more Kellin.” He said, with an apologetic look on his face. “We are going to make an appearance at their concert next weekend, and we can’t cancel.”

“You have to be kidding me. I can’t do it, Jesse.” My voice cracked a little but I kept talking anyway.

“I’m sorry Kellin, but I’m not kidding.” He said before entering the building and leaving me alone outside with my thoughts.

How was he going to react? I mean, he perfectly knew I’ve been avoiding him all this time, and now I’ll have to share the stage with him. Oh, Man. I can already tell there will be lots of awkward silences this time.

Weekdays seemed to pass by so quickly and the next thing I knew is that I was crawling in the van that was going to take us three hours away from here to meet the guys at the venue before the concert started. I was already feeling my hands sweat a little.

“Hey Kellin, you excited about meeting Vic?” Justin asked, winking jokingly at me.

“Shut up, Justin.” I hissed at him and he rolled his eyes.

“Calm down, dude! I was joking. God, you don’t know how to take a joke.” He said, turning back and kept talking with Gabe, still laughing about nonsense stuff.

“Whatever.” I whispered. It’s not like they actually knew what had gone down between us but it still pissed me off. Jesse looked at me and shook his head, disapproving what I had done. I rolled my eyes at him and looked out the window just to see the trees passing by.

You see, that’s one thing I don’t like much road trips, it gives you a lot of spare time to think about things you’re forcing yourself to forget. I rested my head on the window and plugged my headphones on my ears, letting Coldplay’s music flood my mind.