A Lifelong Promise

The days leading up to the gala were increasingly difficult for Paul. Though her kiss wasn't one that came off sober lips, it still drove him mad. He managed to convince himself that it was an accident, something that she did drunk and in the moment. She seemed embarrassed and remorseful...but there was something about the way she looked at him- something lingered in the back of his mind that wouldn't let him shake the feeling that there was more behind it.

"So what are you wearing tomorrow?" Paul asked as he reclined on the couch in Clare's apartment. He found himself there more frequently than he had been. Slowly but surely he found himself there almost more than he was in his own place. When she would strut around in yoga pants and a tank top he had to actively remind himself to keep his eyes off her ass or her perfectly rounds breasts and not let his mind wander to a place he knew it couldn't go. Problem was, it was getting more and more difficult by the hour.

"Um," she collapsed down on the couch next to him. "I had a little black cocktail dress. I figured you can't go wrong with black. I'll make it pop with some gorgeous shoes, of course," she said as she flashed him a grin. She snuggled up into the couch next to him and he felt her shiver just the slightest.

"You cold?" he asked with a wrinkled brow. He was comfortable in sweats and sprawled out with her leaning against him just enough to make him want more. He wrapped his arms around her and rubbed his hands up and down her arms in attempt to warm her up.

"I'm okay," she laughed and he could see her cheeks turn a slight shade of pink. "I'm a little cold, yeah. I don't know where that came from."

Paul sat up and pulled his sweatshirt off revealing the tee shirt he had on underneath. "Here, put it on," he said not giving her the option to say no as he shoved it in her lap and she looked at him trying not to smile. She let out a little laugh as she threw it on and relished in his smell and its warmth all at the same time. "Better?" he asked as he saw how comfortable she was - and how good she looked - in his clothes.

"Yeah," she gave a cute crooked smile and accompanied it with a little nod. "Thank you," she said as she put her legs under her and leaned into him.

Paul needed a second to slow his breathing, or heart beat, or both before he could go back to pretending there wasn't anything there between them- at least on his end. "So like you were saying," he started up again going back to where they left off in their conversation.

"Yeah," she said as she sucked in some air. "It's a classy little black dress, I haven't decided which shoes yet but I can promise they'll be way more fun than just black."

"I guess I can't go wrong with a suit then, obviously."

"Yeah. That's fine. You should be used to them by now."

"Yeah we won't have a problem there. No specific tie color or anything?"

She thought about it for a second before answering. "Nah, I mean I guess silver because it's neutral. Or black. I don't know, whatever you feel best in."

"What time should I meet you here?"

"Um, seven, maybe seven thirty? In between there I'd say. We can head over together. I'm looking forward to it," she said looking genuinely happy. "Way more than I thought I would be and I have you to thank for that." She turned and looked up at him all cozied up in him and his sweatshirt and he felt his heart jump.

Paul swallowed and took in a deep breath. He needed to get out of that comfortable position on the couch of else he knew he'd do something he shouldn't. "I'll be right back," he said as he got up abruptly.

"Where are you going?"

"Bathroom. I'll be right back," he yelled as he made his way in and shut the door behind him. He immediately let out a deep breath and took a second to catch his composure. He grabbed the sink by either side and dug his fingers into the cold surface as he looked up at himself in the mirror. He quickly shook his head and turned on the faucet, slashing his face with cold water. He was beyond frustrated. Not only was it making him go insane every time he was around her, he was angry he even felt this way in the first place. He put himself into a position that he knew was slippery to begin with, and now there was no way out. He turned off the water and made his way back into the dark living room. He wanted to get a glass of water from the kitchen and just as he walked in he ran hard time Clare who was coming out.

"Geez!" she said as she stumbled backwards. "Where did you come from?" she asked as Paul grabbed her by her upper arm and pulled her back into him. She was smashed up against him and there they were looking in each others eyes. Paul realized he hadn't answered and cleared his throat, "I didn't think you were in here. Sorry, I came to get some water - I thought you were still on the couch."

"It's okay," she said with a grin. "You want me to get it for you?" she asked sheepishly, still pressing against him.

He looked down into her eyes and felt himself about to lean down and kiss her so he went to the last resort. "No," he said as he shook his head. "I gotta go, I have to go back to my place."

"You do? You sure? Everything okay?" she asked as she looked at him concerned and rest her hand on his arm.

"Yeah, yeah," he said awkwardly as he cleared his throat yet again. "I just wanna get some sleep for tomorrow."

"Alright, I'll walk you out."

"Nah," he said as nonchalantly as possible as he turned to go.

"Wait. You don't want your sweatshirt back?"

He turned and looked at her with an adoring glance. "No, keep it. It looks better on you anyway."

"Thanks," she appreciated his compliment and he could see that.

"I'll see you tomorrow."

"See ya tomorrow. Night Paul."

"Night Clare," he tossed back as he walked out and closed the door behind him. Once he was in the hall with a wall between them, he leaned against the door and let out a deep breath. He didn't know how much longer he could go not making a move, but he also knew if he did, the potential of ruining their relationship loomed over it.

***

"Hey!" Clare's eyes glittered as she opened the door and greeted Paul.

"Hey, wow," he gasped as he looked her up and down. "You look...you look beautiful."

"Thanks," she answered and he could see her blush a little. "You look good too. I prefer you in a suit. Well, that's a lie. I like you better in sweats."

"You do, huh?" he flirted as he walked towards her.

"I do," she repeated as she wrapped her arms around him. "But I'm sure you get that a lot."

"Yeah," he hugged her back and took in her sweet aroma. "All the guys tell me that every day."

She let out a guttural laugh. "I bet. You ready to go?"

"Yeah."

They drove together and Clare filled him in on who would be there, who they would talk to and what she'd need to do, but above everything else, he could tell that they were going to have a really fun night. When they got there she wrapped her arm around his and got ready to walk through the doors. "Alright, let's do this. Jason will be there, as you know. I doubt he'll be a problem though."

"I wouldn't be worried either way," Paul responded as they made their way inside and he flashed her a quick smile to ease her nerves.

He watched as Clare greeted co-workers and those she needed to interact with, and as she got the the small talk out of the way he decided it would be good timing to grab them some drinks from the bar. When he ordered he saw someone leaning against the bar beside him, and when he turned his head he realized it was Jason.

"So we meet again," Jason said condescendingly as he had his back to the bar with a drink already in his hand looking over the room in his cocky way of doing so.

"Hey man," Paul said as polite as possible.

"So who are you? Her new boyfriend?"

"Nah," Paul shook his head as the bartender handed him his and Clare's drinks. He turned around to look over the room with Jason and leaned against it next to him. "Just friends."

Jason let out a little laugh and took a sip of his drink. "I don't think that's the case. You were in protection mode that night. You don't get that way over someone you're just friends with. It was written on your face - the way you looked at her, hell the way you looked at me. If I fucked her it would have made you so jealous you wouldn't be able to handle it."

Paul swallowed and said nothing as he listened to Jason figure him out. Suddenly his eyes went big and a surprised look overcame his face. "You play with her ex. You're a penguin. Ooooohhh dude that's so fucked up!" Jason exclaimed with more giddiness than was appropriate.

"I don't see how, like I said. Clare...we're just friends. Not that it's any of your business." Paul was shaken a bit and Jason could see that, feed off it.

"I don't think that's true," Jason shook his head. "Look at her," he pointed with his glass at Clare across the room. "You've fallen for her."

Paul choked on his sip of beer as he heard Jason say those words. "No, no way. Sorry to burst your bubble."

"Alright, I guess you won't mind if I ask her to dance," Jason said as he walked away and headed over to Clare, out of earshot before Paul could object. Paul watched uncomfortably as Jason walked up to Clare and asked her to dance. He watched as Clare politely accepted his request, though he could tell she didn't want to, and he watched as Jason held her hand as he led her on to the dance floor where the live band was playing. He watched Jason slide his arms around Clare and then he realized that he'd done enough watching. He grabbed their drinks and marched over to where they were. "Hey," Paul flashed Clare a smile. "I have your drink." He looked over at Jason. "Mind if I cut in?"

Jason shook his head and looked at Paul, proving his point as he begrudgingly walked away. Paul didn't care as he slid his free hand around Clare and held her tight as they sway back and forth to the music. "Thanks for the drink," she said as she put her lips to the glass. "You were right by the way, Jason is a huge sleaze-ball. I think I was trying to see the good in him before," she said with a laugh.

"Yeah you try to see the good in people a lot."

"Well I see the good in you," she said looking up at him.

"You do?"

"You're one of the sweetest, selfless guys I've ever met. I don't know how you and James can be on the same team let alone be in the same profession sometimes. You're such...opposites."

"I wouldn't say that. I've made my share of mistakes, hurt my fair share of people."

"I don't know Paul. The way you are with me... it just doesn't add up. Though I've been fooled before. I thought girls were the shady ones," she teased. "That's why I don't have a lot girlfriends. They hurt you, stab you in the back, and they do it with ease. It's all mastermind games and I don't have time for it. I keep to myself usually...but I like when you're around."

Paul looked down at her and smiled as he dug his fingers into her back. "I like when you're around. I guess I have since I met you. Though it was weird considering the circumstances."

"Things change though. I wouldn't have expected it but, hey, it's the hand I've been dealt," she said with a little shrug. "Like I said, I just know i wouldn't have done it without you."

"Is that a good thing?"

"It's been weird, but I think so." Clare rested her head down on his shoulder for a minute before lifting it up and looking back at him. "Did I thank you for coming tonight with me?"

"I think more than a few times," he said softly as the song came to an end and the band picked up the tempo. He and Clare exchanged a glance and shook their heads. "No," she laughed as he kept his arm around her and walked her off the dance floor.

***

Paul was having more fun than he anticipated at this gala with Clare. He enjoyed seeing the museum, meeting her co-workers, and dancing with her all night. He was back on a mission to get them drinks at the bar. Neither were drunk - not even close - she wanted water and he knew he could handle at least three more beers before he started to feel drunk, but he opted for a water as well.

"You play for the penguins," he heard a girls voice next to him and he turned his head to see who was talking to him.

"I do," he said with a nod to a girl he'd never seen before.

"I thought so," she said as she inched closer and flashed him a smile. "What are you doing here?"

"I, uh," he tried to figure out how to answer the question. "I'm here with a friend."

As the bartender gave him his glasses of water, the girl he was speaking to couldn't help but notice. "Water, huh? I could get you something a little stronger," she offered as she slid over and cozied up next to him.

Paul shook his head and declined politely. "No, thank you though. Are you having a nice evening?"

"Yeah these things are so stiff though."

"I don't think so. I think it's really nice. I like the band and the music. They did the place up real well," he said kindly disagreeing with her.

"If you're into that kind of thing," she said rolling her eyes. "I just like the booze."

"I bet."

"Look if you aren't busy after this thing is over..." she started clearly offering him a night of sex if he wanted to take it.

"I appreciate the offer but no." He scanned the room for Clare but didn't see her. "You have a good night."

"You sure? C'mon. I'll make it worth your while," she said now pleading.

"I bet you will but I'm not interested," he said not looking at her as he went to look for his date for the evening. He searched and searched but didn't see Clare anywhere. After a few minutes he asked where she was, began to ask around, but had no luck. Finally one of her female co-workers told him that they thought they saw her head towards the space room and pointed the way for him.

As Paul walked away from the crowded room and headed towards where his only lead was, he placed their water down on a table and slowly turned down the hall into the space room. He flickered his eyes around it until he saw Clare leaning against the wall under the fabricated stars. "Clare?" he called out gently and saw her lift her head and turn it towards him. "You okay? Why are you in here alone?" he asked as he got closer and could see the faint hint of tears glistening in her eyes.

"I'm fine," she said trying to wipe the evidence away. "Everything's okay," she said again.

"You sure? Why are you crying?" he asked as he stopped in front of her and softly wiped her tears away with his thumbs. He watched as she closed her eyes and fell into him at his touch and he didn't take his hands off her. "Talk to me."

"What...what are you doing in here anyway? I saw you talking to some girl. I thought..." she trailed off.

"Thought what?" he asked with his interested peaked.

"Well, I mean, I thought you were gonna leave with her."

"Why would I leave with her when I could leave with you?" he asked not understanding what she meant.

"Well, it was clear as day that she wanted to go home with you if you would have let her," she said as she looked down at the ground.

Suddenly it dawned on Paul that Clare was jealous. She was actually jealous. He felt his heart race and his breathing become labored as he stared down at the ground even when he saw out of his peripheral vision her lift her head and look at him. Paul slowly shook his head, taking it all in, and quietly took in a deep breath before lifting his head to look in her eyes. He slowly and delicately cupped her face in his hands as he leaned in and pressed his lips to hers. He felt her melt into him and wrap her arms around him, kissing him back with as much passion and intensity as he was pouring into her. His tongue met hers in a beautiful dance as they got to know each other and before it could get too out of hand, he slowed it to a painful stop. He didn't take his hands off her as rested the bridge of his nose against hers, he let out a shaky breath and heard her do the same. "She might have wanted to go home with me...but I want to go home with you," he whispered before picking up where they left off.