A Lifelong Promise

Paul swallowed the lump in his throat as he took a seat when Ray instructed him to do so. He watched as Ray walked further into his office and turned towards the window, giving the knot in his tie a little tug, before clearing his throat and turning to look back at Paul. "You know why I wanted to speak with you?"

Paul shook his head and felt himself clear his suddenly all too itchy throat. "No," he lied knowing full well what this meeting was most likely about.

Ray gave a knowing grin making it obvious that he knew Paul was lying. "You know what makes a great team? A real, winning, championship caliber team?"

Paul waited to hear the rest of this speech; the answer to the rhetorical question posed to him, and as he expected, Ray didn't disappoint. "Chemistry."

Paul nodded in agreement and kept his silence as the pace of his heartbeat picked up to match Ray's movements. "You know what can kill a team faster than any injury?"

"What?" Paul asked out of respect even though he was on to where this was going.

"Distractions."

Paul nodded his head and swallowed down that damn lump in his throat once again.

"You two think you've done a good job keeping everything under wraps? Because if so, you're very mistaken. I can't have two players on my team who are physically fighting each other a lady. Do you realize how much of a PR disaster this is for me? For the team? When- not if - when this gets out it will be a nightmare."

"I understand, sir. But I've tried to keep it as civil as -"

"Doesn't matter how civil you've kept it, that's his wife. There is no way to paint this picture where you don't look bad."

"I respect that opinion but for what it's worth, I didn't do anything to him. He did it himself."

"I believe you," Ray surprised Paul by answering in a much softer tone. "It didn't take me long to figure out what happened and when I approached him about the situation he filled in all the lines I wasn't sure of. So I have his side of it and he doesn't have very friendly feelings towards you right now. Thing is, I've known you for a long time and I don't believe it is in your character to go behind your teammates back and steal his wife. I don't know Clare well but I've met her and she doesn't seem to be that type of lady either. Crosby interceded on your behalf after I met with James. I'm not looking to trade you - or him for that matter - but you can see where this puts me in a bind."

Paul nodded his head. "Yeah. I understand that. If you feel it's best for the team, I'll take the blame and you can trade me."

"That's very noble of you to offer, but I like i said, I'm not looking to trade you. If the two of you can't keep it out of the locker room then I might not have a choice. I've seen women come between teammates and a lot of the time one has to leave. I'm not saying this is what will happen, but I'm preparing you for the possibility now and giving you two the chance to fix it. I don't care if you hate each other out of this building but I will not tolerate it dividing the team, picking sides. Are we clear?"

"Yes," Paul nodded. "I don't wan to be a distraction and believe me she doesn't either."

"She's a lovely girl. I think I know how this story played out more than James wants me to. In confidence I'm telling you that he's wrong. But at the same time his feelings towards you are to be expected. This is not an easy situation to work out."

"It isn't but we have been trying. We have," he insisted.

"I don't doubt that. I know that this place, this team is a passion for you both," Ray complimented.

"I am sorry for putting everyone in such a delicate situation," Paul sighed. "It was never intended to happen this way."

"You don't need to apologize. You seem happy and quite frankly what goes on in yours and his personal lives isn't my business - but it becomes my business when it effects this team and you doing your jobs. I'm asking you both not to let it get to that point."

"You have my word," Paul promised whole-hearted meaning it.

"Good. I will hold you to that." Ray took a deep breath before he tilted his head and looked at Paul approvingly. "You must really love her."

"I do," Paul said with a nod.

"I can see that - no man would voluntarily put himself on the chopping block for something he was only in it with for a good time."

Paul smiled as he took a deep breath and began to stand up. "Thank you. Are we..."

"We're set here." Ray extended his hand to shake Paul's. "Don't make me have to take any action," he repeated seriously as he shook it.

Paul nodded and took a deep breath in - he didn't release it until he left Ray's office and felt the door close behind him. His heart was still pounding but he was calm. His life had changed when he fell for Clare and there would be more changes ahead one way or another. He knew he should have felt anger towards James for actually admitting to Ray that he wanted Paul gone - but then again, he understood to some degree. He's feelings shifted like the wind when it came to other perspectives on his situation with Clare and his internal battle always ended the same way: he didn't give a damn what anyone thought.

***

"How were you not freaking out?" Clare asked as Paul filled her in on the events from earlier in his day. They were sitting on the couch wrapped up in each other and as he felt her skin on his and rubbed his hands over her long legs he knew he'd never question his decision. They'd both expected some kind of discussion but were hoping it wouldn't come to that. Now that it had, and the conversation was over, there was a sense that a cloud had seemingly been lifted, if only slightly, off their shoulders. It was out in the open and there was at least some kind of answer as to how it would be dealt with - if it came to it.

"My heart was going a mile a minute," Paul said with a laugh. "But he was perfectly respectful about it. He knows in his heart of hearts I didn't do anything to betray James and he was actually quite complimentary of you. He doesn't want to trade anyone but wasn't shy in saying if it came to it, he would. Team comes first, I get that."

"Well at least you're not going anywhere anytime soon. And why are we so sure it'd be you who was moved? It could be him for all you know."

"It could," Paul nodded. "But I offered to be the one if it came to it."

"Why?" Clare asked as she tilted her head and rested her hand on his cheek.

"I caused this - I know he made his own bed - but I fell for you. I made that choice. Actions have consequences and if my relationship with you was that much of a distraction I'm okay with being the one to be moved. I have you and I'm happy and our future is what I'm focused on. I can play in any jersey."

Clare closed her eyes and absorbed his words feeling her heart flutter inside her chest. She leaned in and kissed him with all that she had. "Doesn't matter what jersey you have on, I'll be with you, supporting you."

"I know that. No matter how this unfolds, I win. Life's all about choices and I put a lot of thought into mine. You're my choice and the rest will fall into place." He pulled her into him and felt her rest her head on his shoulder.

"I don't deserve you," she breathed out silently. Feeling safe and secure and completely complacent in his arms was still baffling to her. Even after everything he'd done for her, after all the times he'd shown just how deeply he loved her, it still took her breath away.

"Well we aren't out of the woods yet. There is no guarantee him and I will ever be able to really fake it that much. I don't see him letting it go and I won't back down. I can be respectful but I have a line that he could cross and that's you."

"I know that. I just feel like. I don't know. I still feel like the problem, like you're catching heat because of me and I hate that feeling. It's a nagging one that James played on and made worse. I know it isn't the truth." Clare glanced up at him and he could tell by the look in her eyes she was struggling, but also very sincere. "I don't like being the distraction. I makes me feel terrible. I love you but I hate that."

"It's all going to be okay, it'll all work out. One way or another, it'll be fine. You know that, right?" he ran his fingers through her hair and breathed out with his lips to her ear.

"Yeah," she said with a nod. "I know. You know something? You know one of the reasons I fell in love with you?"

"What's that?"

"We compliment each other really well. When I'm weak, you're the strong one and when I doubt, you always are rational and you never let me fall. I know I've said it to you before but it's really true. The longer we're together the more I see it clear as day."

***

It'd been a good few weeks since that talk in Shero's office. With the promise of a trade looming over their heads if they couldn't keep it together, both Paul and James were playing nice. There was no improvement in their actual relationship, but there was no speak of it in the locker room. Though Sid tried as he might to keep it as a players-only fight, it had escalated beyond his control, and Shero's stepping in put everyone in place. It wasn't like the rest of the team forgot what was going on, but it wasn't actively shoved in their faces. Paul and James were able to physically be in the same room without one of them throwing punches - this simple act was a better thing than it sounded.

"Come out tonight," Chris asked as he walked out of the building from practice with Paul. There was no game that night and no practice the next day so a bunch of the guys and some of their girls wanted to go out.

"Ah I don't know man," Paul replied hesitantly. "I mean it'd be nice but I'd want to bring Clare and I don't know how awkward that'll be. Honestly I don't know if the other girls will give her a hard time and then there's Neal..."

"I know but you guys seem like you're on a good level. And she's tough. I don't know I just thought it'd be fun. We like her, you do know that right? We know her. I think if you keep your distance from him it'll be fine. Just don't hump her in public and he should be able to be in the same room."

Paul scratched his head and hesitated before answering. "I don't know. Maybe. I'll ask her, let me talk to her. Maybe."

"Okay well that isn't a no, so I'll take that as a good strong possibility."

"I didn't say - "

"Just let me know for sure so I can give the guys a heads up," Chris cut him off as he walked away from Paul and to his car.

"Okay," Paul agreed. "I'll text you."

He didn't know what Clare's feelings would be. He knew she'd feel out of place but she surprised him when she gave her agreement. "I don't want to isolate you from them. If you want to go then absolutely I'll go with you in that is what you want."

"I wouldn't want to go without you - it's you and me now. You don't have to do this for me though, Clare. If you aren't comfortable -"

"I'm sure. You deserve to have fun with your friends and I want to be with you. We might even have fun," she said with a playful undertone as Paul held his phone and drove closer to their home.

"Okay. I'll tell them we're in then."

***

There was an immediate feeling like all eyes were on them as they walked in the bar and felt the rest of the guys watch them walk over hand-in-hand. The hardest glare drilling into them was coming from James and they did their best to ignore it. Keeping their PDA on an almost nonexistent level so that he wouldn't feel uncomfortable, Clare fought the urge to hide behind Paul and wrap her arms around him. She didn't want to be one of those clingy girls but this was an awkward situation and whenever she'd begin to feel anxious she'd want to get that security from Paul. Thing was - when her heart would pound and she wanted to bury her face in his chest and disappear, as if he could sense it, he'd reach over and give her hand a little squeeze before looking at her and flashing an endearing smile. Clare would instantly feel her nerves settle down and wanted nothing more than to wrap her arms around him and kiss him each and every time - now her self control was torturous, but for different reasons.

Clare didn't want to risk saying anything stupid, or anything that could come back around to haunt her, so she was usually the type of girl who was more reserved, quiet, and didn't speak much. She knew people interpreted her silence as stuck up, like she didn't like them, but it couldn't be further from the truth. Clare was lovely and fun to talk to - but she was shy by nature. This situation didn't help because she knew there was a lot that could be said.

They'd been there close to two hours when Paul turned to Clare and slipped his arms around her waist. He looked into her eyes and brought his face down to hers, resting the bridge of his nose against hers not caring who was watching or who might be 'offended'. "How are you doing? You alright?"

Clare pushed back into him and wrapped her arms around his neck as she breathed him in. "Mmmm. I'm okay. It's weird, you were right."

Paul smiled into her and gave her a quick kiss on the lips. "One more drink and we'll go, okay?"

"Okay," she agreed.

"What do you want?"

"I'm good, just get yours - don't worry about me. I don't want another one."

"You sure?"

"Mmm, yeah I'm sure."

"Alright. I'll drink it fast. I gotta admit you've been a trooper tonight. I know you can pretend you wanted to come out and I appreciate you sacrificing for me, but I was fine with not coming."

"I know, but I wanted to do this for you. You deserve it."

Paul snuck a quick kiss in before pulling back and ordering his last drink with his hand still securely wrapped around her waist. As he got his beer Clare finally let her eyes dart around the room. She'd been avoiding looking anywhere that could potentially make her have eye contact with James, but she hadn't seen him in a while. She didn't mean to but her eyes were pulled to him standing against the wall talking with some girl. She could read their body language and knew what was going on. It bothered her if only a little but she forced herself to look away and stop invasively watching their intimate conversation.

Clare looked down to check the time on her phone when she felt Paul innocently lean down and kiss her on the side of her head. She smiled to herself and sat with him quietly as he continued his conversation that was quickly coming to an end. It was late and he was almost done with his beer, she knew he had every intention of keeping his word and they'd be leaving shortly. As Paul wrapped up his discussion and said his premature good bye, Clare looked up and saw James leaving with that girl she'd seen him talking with. As he walked out the door he turned quickly and shot Clare a devilish grin.

Paul saw what'd just happened and watched James walk outside with his skanky friend for the night -as he'd seen him do plenty of times before. When he looked at Clare he didn't know what to do as he watched her burst into tears.