A Lifelong Promise

Clare clutched her stomach and winced in pain as she felt her uterus contract. She gripped onto the bar of the shopping cart even tighter until her fingers were white and squeezed her eyes shut trying to stabilize herself. She felt her heart racing and her nerves paralyzing her as she finally opened her eyes and stared down at the wet ground. She knew that she was in labor and it terrified her to her core.

She trembled as she looked up at James who was staring back at her unsure of what to do.

"Excuse me," she heard from somewhere in her peripheral but she was too frozen to move. "Excuse me," she heard more frantically as the young employee ran over to her. "Ma'am are you okay? Do you need me to call an ambulance?"

She quickly shook her head and the panic in her eyes heightened the urgency of the already concerned boy. He ran up to the front of the store - sprinted actually - as Clare tried to get her breathing under control.

James finally found his legs and he walked awkwardly over to her. He tried to rest his hand on the small of her back but she slapped his arm away. "I might be in labor but I'll still kill you if you put your hands on me," she growled as she looked at him with pure rage. He swallowed and shook his head understanding why she felt the way she felt. "I'm still going to stay until the ambulance gets here. At least let me help you get to the front of the store."

"I'd rather give birth right here by myself than let you touch me."

"Clare," he swallowed again. "Don't be stubborn." It was weird how rational he was being, but it was because he was completely in shock - he couldn't think straight and he didn't know what to do. As angry and hurt and heartbroken as he felt towards Clare, he didn't want to be responsible for anything happening to her baby. Plus, he knew that if it did, Paul would kill him. Seeing Clare in this state was terrifying to him because despite it all, he still cared for her deep down - he always would.

He hesitantly rested his hand on her back and helped guide her to the front of the store where he saw flashing lights. As they reached the doors the emergency unit was rushing in. If James couldn't think clearly, Clare was ten times worse. The EMT's helped her into the ambulance and as they got her situated one turned to James and asked if he was coming. Both Clare and James realized in that moment that he thought they were married.

"No," Clare blurted out from inside the ambulance, startling the young kid.

"Clare..." James went to try and reason with her but she cut him off. "He is not my husband. I don't want him in here."

The kid looked at James and gave an awkward shrug. "Sorry bro," he said as nicely as he could as he shut the door.

Clare sat in the ambulance and clutched her stomach as she felt the painful waves of childbirth come and go. "Please," she breathed out as she fumbled for her purse. "Call my husband. He needs to meet me at the hospital."

The kid sitting closest to her helped her find her phone and patiently listened to Clare's instructions for her code to her husbands name and dialed as she clutched the edge of the gurney.

"Hello? Is this Paul?" Clare heard the kid ask after what felt like an eternity of rings. She listened to him explain to Paul how she was in labor and on her way to the hospital and imagined how much worse he probably felt. He was the one who was nervous about her going out alone to begin with, he was always the one looking out for her well-being and she never really took it too seriously. She knew he was freaking out and before the call ended she breathed out, "Please tell him to drive carefully."

The trip to the hospital finally ended and the young men helped her out of the ambulance and into a wheelchair. "Are you okay?" they asked as they looked down into her eyes, and for the first time Clare took a second and looked back. "No," she shook her head terrified and began to cry. "I can't do this," she breathed out. "I'm scared and I can't do this without my husband."

The sympathy that came over the kids face was undeniable. "I'll wheel you to check in. You're going to be just fine. They'll take good care of you. Relax."

Clare held onto her stomach as they rolled her down the hall and prayed when she turned the corner that Paul would be there waiting for her. She knew he wouldn't be, and wasn't surprised when he wasn't, but she was surprised at the fact that James came running down the hallway behind her.

She turned and shot him a death glare. "Get out."

"I won't bother you I just felt I needed to make sure you got here okay. It was my fault you even went into labor to begin with. I'll stay until Paul gets here and then I'll leave."

"You'll stay right here in the hall," she barked. "I don't want to see you."

"I understand," he nodded. His guilt was eating at him pretty badly and this was his attempt to clear his conscious.

***

Paul sprinted through the hospital doors and down the hallway to registration to see where Clare was. Once they told him he took off to the elevators and fidgeted like a madman the whole ride up. When the doors open he turned to run down the hallway but found himself nearly paralyzed as he realized James was sitting nervously in the waiting area by himself. Paul clenched his jaw and inhaled slowly as he realized exactly what happened. When James finally looked up and saw him, he quickly went to stand up to try and talk to Paul but Paul was having none of it. He lunged at James and hit him hard in the face. "What the fuck did you do?" Paul screamed in pure hatred.

"You gotta calm down," James tried to reason with him but Paul hit him again. "What happened?" Paul asked authoritatively, pulling zero punches.

"I ran into her in the store." James pursed his lips and thought back to the awful things he'd said to her. "We ended up getting into an argument, as you can imagine seeing her pregnant with your baby kind of set me off."

"And your response is to fight with an eight months pregnant woman? You really are disgusting."

"I'm not exactly proud of it okay. But I followed the ambulance and felt I needed to wait until you got here. She's only been here about twenty minutes. Her water broke in the store - that's why 911 was called."

"If something happens to my wife or my baby because of your narcissistic fucked up, entitled, bitter attitude, I will kill you and I don't care about the consequences," Paul growled in a low yet terrifyingly serious voice before he walked away and hurried to Clare's room.

When he walked in he ran to Clare's side who sighed out in total relief that he was there. "Are you okay?" he asked as he kissed her lips, forehead and cheek, his hand resting firmly on her stomach.

"I'm so scared," she started to cry but he wiped her tears away. "Everything is going to be okay," he said calmly as he looked in her eyes, willing her to believe him. "It's going to be okay. You're having our baby Clare, it'll all be okay. You're doing great already baby and I'm here and I'm not leaving you. I knew I shouldn't have let you leave."

She pressed the bridge of her nose against his and felt her shoulders relax for the first time since she'd left his side a few hours ago. "I'm already dilated seven centimeters - the doctor said it won't take long. Sometimes first babies take a while but because of how I went into labor and the fact my water broke they don't think -" Clare cut off as she winced in pain and grabbed her stomach. She let out a yelp of agonizing pain and Paul instinctively grabbed her hand for her to hold onto. "I feel everything!" she screamed out in the most pain Paul had ever seen her.

"Did you get the drugs?" he asked before being met with her death glare.

"No, I couldn't. They told me I was too far along when I got here."

"Okay, that's okay. We'll be fine. You can do this Clare, you're going to be such a wonderful mother when our baby comes out of there. You're more than I deserve and I thank God everyday that you married me - I promise you with all that I am that our baby will feel the same way."

Clare looked at him and smiled as she exhaled out deeply. "I love you."

He leaned down and kissed her sweaty forehead once again. "I love you."

"Baby," she breathed out.

"Yeah?"

"Please go get the doctor. I can feel the baby burrowing out of my birth canal," she moved around uncomfortably and winced in pain. "I'm pretty sure I need to push."

Paul let out a sigh to keep his nerves at bay and ran to get the nurse who got the doctor. When they checked Clare they confirmed that she was ready to push and that the head of the baby was already almost there. A brief wave of fear overcame her but it didn't have time to go far as she was too focused on pushing and in too much pain to let fear control her. Paul stood by the nurse and encouraged his wife to keep going when she thought she couldn't, or that the pain was too much. He watched as she delivered their beautiful baby girl and cried as he cut the cord.

"Is she okay?" Clare cried out in complete exhaustion, but due to the fact that she went so early the fear she had most was that something would be wrong with her baby.

After being looked over by the nurses and wrapped up securely Clare was finally able to hold her little miracle. "She's perfectly healthy," the nurse said with a beaming smile as she handed her over to Clare.

Clare broke down into happy tears as she looked at her baby girl for the first time. She felt Paul kiss the side of her head and then lean down and gently kiss the top of the baby's.

"She's perfect," he breathed out as he wiped the tears from his own eyes. "Just like you. I'm so proud of you." He nuzzled his nose into the side of her cheek and breathed out a sigh of relief as he finally realized everything was okay. "I was so nervous when I got that call. And then I ran into him in the hall and I lost it Clare. I was so afraid...if something would have happened to you - anything. Or to the baby..." he trailed off unable to continue because the thought of it pained him so much.

"I have you here and everything is okay just like you said it would be. I wouldn't want to do this with anyone but you. It's all okay. We have the best Thanksgiving blessing ever and everything is okay."

"I can't believe this night," Paul shook his head in disbelief. "We were making cookies in the kitchen a few hours ago and now we're holding our daughter."

"Yeah tell me about it. I wanted to kill him. He just..." Clare trailed off trying to keep herself from getting angry again. "I should have listened to you and stayed home. He's just...I'm...there are no words."

"I know, believe me. I know."

"He just was going on and on and you know how he gets...and I couldn't take it. My water broke right there and I panicked. I didn't know what to do. I think I froze for a good few minutes or maybe seconds I don't know, and some poor kid who worked there asked if he should call an ambulance and he did. I was so scared, I just wanted you. I didn't want to have the baby without you, I couldn't do it."

"Don't even get yourself all worked up about it. I dealt with him, I will continue to. Just count down the days until we can move and start our new life out of Pittsburgh. I should have gotten traded last season and saved you from being subjected to this."

"No, it's okay," she shook her head. "I support you and the best place for us to be at the time was here. But I'm ready to go wherever God wants us. I just want to be with you and raise a family without any drama."

"We'll figure it out. We always do. No matter what happens it's you and me and we've gone through hell and back. We can handle anything." Paul leaned down and kissed her on her lips. Even though she'd been through labor and delivery and she was sweaty, pale and dehydrated, she was still the most beautiful creature he'd ever laid eyes on.

"I can't believe we have a baby. Such a perfect little girl. God I love you both so much." Clare was overwhelmed with emotions and plagued with exhaustion as she began to cry harder. Her hormones were running rampant and her body was trembling from lack of sleep, food, water and pain but none of it phased her in that moment. In that moment, she was entirely complete - the most she'd ever been in her entire life.

"Have we decided on a name?" the doctor asked as he walked over to congratulate the new parents.

Clare looked at Paul who flashed her a darling smile and nodded for her to answer. She turned and looked at the doctor, down at the baby, and back up at him. "Ava," she answered sweetly as she again looked down adoringly at her baby girl.