California King Bed

Chest to chest
Nose to nose
Palm to palm
We were always just that close
Wrist to wrist
Toe to toe
Lips that felt just like the inside of a rose
So how come when I reach out my finger
It feels like more than distance between us

Jennifer Bullock lay in bed, staring up at the ceiling. She was unable to sleep…which was something that had been happening far too often lately. She turned to lay on her side, and doing so resulted in her staring at the reason why she had been trouble sleeping for the past few months.

Her boyfriend, Mike Richards lay there, softly snoring. It wasn’t the snoring that kept Jenny awake. If only it were that simple. What kept her awake was the distance between her and Mike…or so to speak. They lived together, they slept together, and they were together. But lately, it felt like they were miles apart.

They had started dating 3 years ago, when Mike was still with the Philadelphia Flyers. They had met at the hospital where Jenny was doing her residency. Mike was there with some of his teammates visiting patients in the hospital. They ran into each other…literally. And while Mike was helping Jenny up, she recognized him, and told him she was a big fan of his. They had started talking hockey, and Mike had offered to get her tckets to a game. Jenny had accepted, and after the game she went to, her and Mike had gone to grab a bite to eat together.

The connection had been instant. They got along great, and had fun together. And it started out as friendship, which is how strong relationships are supposed to start. So when Jenny started feeling something more fpr Mike, she didn’t really question it. And when he reached to hold her hand when they’d gone to see a movie, she didn’t question her heart, and the way it started beating like crazy. And after that movie, when he’d gently kissed her outside her apartment building, she sure as hell hadn’t questioned her knees, for feeling so weak.

That had been the start of something amazing. The things that had made their friendship so great were things that made their new romance great as well. Sure they had their disagreements, but what couple didn’t? They remained close, and in love. Although Jenny did have to admit that things started feeling different towards the end of their time in Philadelphia. Jenny chalked it up his being stressed about hockey. And she couldn’t blame him. Things could be tough for hockey players in Philly…Mike (as captain of the team) especially. So she didn’t worry about it…much.

OK, that was a lie. She worried about it all the time. Mike started acting so different. He still treated her fine, and said the right things. But when he told her that he loved her, Jenny couldn’t help but notice that he wasn’t looking at her the same way anymore. And they talked and joked around, doing what they always did, Jenny couldn't help but notice that his heart didn't seem totally in it.

Eye to eye
Cheek to cheek
Side by side
You were sleeping next to me
Arm in arm
Dusk to dawn
With the curtains drawn
And a little last night on these sheets
So how come when I reach out my finger
It seems like more than distance between us

The day of Mike's trade to the Los Angeles Kings had been hectic and crazy, with phones ringing off the hook, and cell phones beeping like crazy. Jenny had taken a few of weeks vacation from her job at Temple Univeristy Hospital to go spend time with Mike and his family (whom she adored…and they loved her too) in Kenora. It was convenient that she was there the day the trade happened.

It was only after the sun set, and Mike’s family had left for the day that Mike and Jenny both had a chance to breathe. Mike sunk down onto the couch with a loud sigh. Jenny sat beside him, reaching for his hand and laying her head on his shoulder. He put his arm around her, pulling her more closely into him. They just sat there, together in silence until they'd both fallen asleep.

The nest morning, Jenny was the first one to get up. She made breakfast, and then started making calls to moving companies to start moving their stuff. She made calls to her family and friends in Philly. And the last call she made was to her work, asking for a relocation request to Los Angeles. At that point Mike had woken up, so heard the entire conversation Jenny had with her work.

It was only about a week after they'd moved to California that Jenny realized that Mike had never actually asked her to move to California with him. She had felt such a sense of shame, and hurt upon realizing that. She kept telling herself she should ask Mike about it...especially since things were getting worse and worse between them.

Just when I felt like giving up on us
You turned around and gave me one last touch
That made everything feel better
And even then my eyes got wetter
So confused wanna ask you if you love me
But I don't wanna seem so weak
Maybe I've been California dreaming

Jenny turned over again, away from Mike. She knew she needed to talk to Mike, and ask him where things stood with them right now. If he didn't want to be in this relationship...if he didn't want Jenny with him anymore, then fine. But Jenny sure as hell didn't want to waste anymore of her time and energy on this. She took a deep breath, and closed her eyes, willing the sleep to take over her body. She would deal with this in the morning. That's what she always told herself anyways. But this time, she meant it.

She suddenly felt Mike's arms wrap around her, and pull her against him. She tensed up. "Hey Jen...you having trouble sleeping babe?" asked Mike. Jenny could feel her eyes tearing up. THIS was the man she had fallen in love with. The man who she so rarely saw anymore. Times like these, she thought that maybe...just maybe they could work things out.

She quickly brushed away the tears that had just spilled, and managed to say, "Yeah...sorry if I woke you up." Mike pressed a gentle kiss to the back of her neck before pulling her close. After a few moments, Jenny said, "Mike?" Now was as good a time as any to talk about them. But all she heard back was silence. And the light sounds of Mike's snores again.

Jenny could not stop herself from silently sobbing, with Mike's arms wrapped around her. Her California king, who she loved so much. But did he love her back anymore? The back and forth of it all hurt, and Jenny was not sure if she could take it any longer. But for now, the feeling of his breath gently hitting her neck as he slept behind her, and his arms around her let her forget for a while.

In this California king bed
We're ten thousand miles apart
I'll be wishing on these stars
For you're heart on me
My California king