ABDUCTED

The car ride home was silent. I didn't mind, even though I knew it made her uncomfortable. She wanted to say something, but didn't know how.

I'd let Emily lead me to the bedroom once we got home, too worn down to object. The endless machine of doctors, hospitals, and psychiatrists was consuming me. No wonder I'd been throwing up so much, it was sickening. I wanted a quick fix, I wanted out. I needed to get out of my own head. I'd have gladly given up everything but Emily just to be someone else.

"Here..." She said, taking one of my hands and trailing it up her shirt, grazing her soft skin. She reached for my other hand, doing the same until they were both beneath her underwire bra, cupping her chest. "How does that feel?"

I felt my face going hot, and immediately dropped my gaze. I knew where this was going.

"....good."

I bit down on my lip, trying to resist the overwhelming urge to move away. It did feel good, but I wasn't exactly positive I could handle much more right now.

Emily smiled encouragingly.

"I'm glad. I want you to feel good, Will."

I was almost sure that was part of what my psychiatrist told her to say. Although I knew it to be true, it just sounded so... mechanic. Too well formulated, too well thought out. A more polite "I wish you'd have sex with me." She could've gotten it out of a psych book. Maybe she did.

Pushing away my pessimistic thoughts, I leaned in and pressed my lips to hers. Kissing was easy. I was used to kissing. I could handle kissing. I'd fucked a lot of things up, but I could still do this fairly well. Kissing felt good, and she wanted me to feel good.

Her mouth was hot, and her delicate tongue was smooth. I pushed my own tongue into her mouth, squeezing her small chest at the same time. It felt good, pleasurable. For a moment, I thought I could -

"Nnn... no. Em, no."

I quickly pushed her hand away from the zipper on my jeans, taking a step back. Too fast.

"No?"

"Get off me..." I whimpered, once again trying to break the cable ties around me. His firm grip around my shoulders tightened. I began to desperately try and ram my back further into the chair's backing, in the hopes of it tipping over.

"Will, may I suggest you sit still?"

I momentarily stopped thrashing when I felt something cold between my legs. It grazed at a particular vein, turning me to stone.

Lecter smiled tauntingly at me. There was an omnipresent sense of evil in the dimly lit room. I'd always felt it, but pushed it aside for awhile, deeming it to be paranoia.

"You can cooperate, or you can bleed out. The choice is, ultimately, up to you."

"DON'T TOUCH ME!" I screamed, placing my hands over my face. Where was I? What was even going on?

I ran backwards, until I felt the harsh slam of my back against a wall. I couldn't breathe. My heart felt as if it were attacking my rib cage, desperate to get out. It boomed in my ears, in my throat, in the palms of my hands...

"Will? It's just me, Em."

I sunk to the floor, pulling my knees up to my chest. Emily's petit figure loomed in front of me, kneeling. I saw double, which then morphed into him... back to her... back to him... back again.

"Emily?" I panted, clumsily reaching out to try and grab at her shaky and blurred body while it was still there. Something so tangible, something I needed.

I screamed again as he came closer, still grinning in this demonic way. Sociopath. Closing my eyes did nothing.

"Will, it's Emily. You are in your apartment, you are with your girlfriend. You are having flashbacks, that's all it is. It's all over."

I felt arms around me - slender arms, female arms. My body wouldn't budge, a paralyzed turtle stuck in its shell. Her hair felt like satin against my damp cheek. I hadn't realized I'd been crying.

I blinked a few times, staring numbly at her. Moving my knees, I clumsily pulled her into my lap like she were a kitten. My trembling lips brushed against her forehead. I didn't know what to do, so I just kissed her again and again. Her hair, her forehead, her cheeks, her temple, her nose, and finally her lips.

"I'm so sorry... just... so sorry." I whispered, hugging her as hard as I could without hurting her. My grip tightened as I held in another sob.

"What happened to you was not your fault. You have nothing to be sorry for."