Strong Enough

It was near 10 o’clock when everyone was finally gone. The house was so quiet it was almost strange. I flopped onto the couch in the back room next to Mia after I’d helped clear the trash from around the house. It felt so much better sitting in my yoga pants and a tank top knowing no one was looking at me. Dad had put on The Music Man on the TV, which made me smile. He’d never admit it, but my dad loved to sing.

“So?” I looked over at Mia who was waiting for me explain something.

“So…what?” My eyes went back to the movie, hoping she’d believe I had no idea what she was asking.

“So what’s the damn story? You were friends with 3 delicious guys for years and you never mentioned them to me even once?”

“Oh please. I talked about my friends from high school.”

“You mentioned knowing people in high school. But you never said they were gorgeous beefy men who look good enough to eat and have real personalities.”

“Oh dear God, don’t ever tell them you described them that way.”

“Stop trying to change the subject.”

“Why? I don’t like this subject.” I finally pulled my eyes from the screen and looked at her. “If I wanted to talk about them, don’t you think I would have in the last 5 years you’ve known me?”

I could tell from her face that she could see the hurt in my eyes. This girl was my best friend and it wasn’t that I didn’t trust her, in fact I trusted her more than anyone. But, if I told her about those boys then I’d have to face the reality that I’d been practically destroyed 5 years ago and that wasn’t something I wanted to do.

After a few moments of a very tense silence, Mia finally poked me.

“Do you think it would look awkward if I started dating Tommy? I mean, I’m 5’6” and he’s what, like the size of a tree?” I let out a small snort at her attempt to cheer me up.

“I don’t think Tommy would care if you weren’t tall enough to ride a roller coaster. His eyes didn’t leave your body all night if he could help it.” I smiled at her and like that the tension was gone. I knew she wouldn’t drop it forever, but for now I could push it all away again; back to the place I’d kept it hidden for five years.

It was only about 20 minutes longer before we both sauntered up the stairs and into my old room at the end of the hall. It looked exactly how I left it. As Mia and I flopped into the king-sized bed, we started giggling again over how much Tommy eye raped Mia all day. As the laughter died, we both fell into an easy sleep after a long day.

***

“Apple Jax, get out of bed you lazy piece of shit!” There is no way it’s morning already.

“Your life is in serious danger ass face.” I reached blindly for something to throw at the voice, but found nothing and gave up.

“Like you could do any damage to me right now. You’re still half asleep and I’m the big brother.” I felt the bed shift and only seconds later the full body weight of my older brother as he dog-piled me.

“Holy crap, Fatty. Did you eat a McDonald’s before coming over?” I attempted to push him off me but failed as he started tickling me. I started fighting harder, flailing as I started laughing. Being as ticklish as I am, I’m borderline dangerous because I can’t control my limbs.

“Rude much? I’m getting married tomorrow and you’re insulting me?” I finally managed to push him off to the side before punching his arm.

“You wake me up, from a damn good dream might I add, and try to suffocate and tickle me, which you know I hate, in the space of 5 minutes. You get no sympathy from me.” I rubbed the sleep from my eyes, sliding out of bed before being tackled and thrown over my brother’s shoulder.

“Put me down! I take it back. You’re not fat!” I felt him moving through the hallway and begin the descent down the stairs. “Wait, where are we going anyway? I’m not dressed.”

“It’s family breakfast time. Dad’s making waffles. And everyone’s coming over to go over final details before the rehearsal dinner tonight.”

The closer we got, the stronger the smell became and the more my mouth watered. I didn’t know what time it was, but my stomach was more than ready to be fed.

“Alex, why isn’t your sister wearing pants?” My mother was setting a pitcher of orange juice on the table. I pulled my shirt down as much as I could over the panties I wore, thanking God I’d changed out of my thong last night in favor of some boy shorts. I mean I like how I look, and I’ve been in a lot less around people. But, my southern momma had no knowledge of that. I wanted to keep it that way.

“You wanted her down for breakfast, I deliver. Don’t nitpick about the results.”

“He was upset because I called him fat after he tried to kill me and wouldn’t let me get dressed.” Alex set me down on a kitchen chair before flopping down next to his fiancé, Leeana. It was strange how things worked out. Leeana, Mia and I were roommates our first 3 years at UNLV. The three of us were the girls to know; the three musketeers. That is until my brother came to visit second semester junior year and destroyed everything. Not that I’m not happy they met. She’ll actually be my sister now. But she moved out here to California with him as soon as she finished classes and things will never be the same.

“Eat up darlin’. You’ve got a day ahead of you.” My dad put a waffle on the plate in front of me, placing a kiss on the top of my head.

“What does that even mean?” I grabbed the fork, cutting a piece of the waffle and shoving it into my mouth.

“I told you she’d forget! Pay up!” Mia held her hand out to my brother expectantly. He slapped a twenty into her hand shaking his head.

“I can’t believe I bet on you. Your memory is the size of an almond.” My brother rolled his eyes as a knock sounded from the front of the house and he stood to answer it.

“Jax, it’s the day before my wedding,” Leeana was shaking her head as she spoke, her blonde hair catching the sunlight. “We’ve got to get you fitted in your dress, the rehearsal lunch is this afternoon, we have to finalize the details and make sure everything is completely ready and it’s my bachelorette party tonight! Seriously, I thought blondes were supposed to be the dumb ones.”

“Bitch please, we both know I kicked your ass in every class we took together. Which one of us got a 4.0? Oh, that’s right. Me.” I took a sip of my orange juice, ignoring the pointed glare from my mother over the swearing. Footsteps echoed through the hallway toward the kitchen as a small cluster of people ambled in.

My brother reclaimed his seat as I took in the sight before me. A girl a little younger than me entered the room, followed by an older blonde couple.

“Mr. and Mrs. Stevens!” Mia and I popped up and gave them hugs. They’d been around a few times throughout our schooling and they weren’t any kind of strangers to me or Mia. “How’s it going?”

“Oh, you know, daughter’s getting married. Feeling old. How are you ladies?” Mrs. Stevens was the sweetest lady.

“We’re great. And you gotta be Emmaline.” I turned to the younger girl who had to be Lee’s little sister. She smiled and nodded.

“It’s Emma. You call me Emmaline, I’ll kill you.”

“I like this girl!” I wrapped my arm around her neck deciding it would be fun to corrupt her. “How old are you?”

“21.” She looked at me like I’d grown another head.

“Oh phew. Had to make sure we wouldn’t be doing anything illegal.”

The happy moment was ruined when what sounded like cattle burst through the front door and ran through the hall to the kitchen. Tommy, Rylan and Bryden appeared, smiling like idiots. As soon as they saw the food on the table they pounced.

“Woah, what are they doing here?” My eyes shifted from the bottomless pits to my brother and future sister-in-law.

“Ho, we’re the groomsmen.” Tommy smiled through the half chewed waffle in his mouth.

My eyes went wide and I thought they’d pop out of my head. How, in the last 10 months of wedding planning and flower talk and color changes had no one mentioned that these three boys would be in the wedding party?

My eyes found Alex who looked as guilty as ever. He knew what had happened. How could he have not told me?

“Um, Jax,” Rylan’s voice pulled me from my fuming state. “Why aren’t you wearing pants?”