Strong Enough

I pulled the tight jeans over my tanned legs before ripping the loose t-shirt over my head. As I pulled my bra on, I stared at the pile of shirts in my suitcase. Sitting down on the edge of my bed, my face fell into my hands and a groan erupted from my chest. It wasn’t like I didn’t know my brother was friends with them, but didn’t he have any other friends?

No.

Of course not.

That would have been too easy.

“You know, normal girls don’t sit around without a shirt on.” My head snapped up meeting those eyes that haunted my memories.

“You know, normal people knock when they come into a room uninvited.” I stood up, turning my back on him and pulled a black tank top from the pile, yanking it down over my head. “Plus, I’m not normal and I look fucking hot without a shirt on.”

“Oh, if only your mom could hear you now.” I shot a glare in his direction.

“Why are you here anyway? Don’t you have someone else to annoy?”

“Lee wanted me to tell you we’re leaving in ten.” I could tell he was getting slightly uncomfortable. Well, good. It wasn’t exactly payback, but it did make me feel a bit better about things.

“Okay.” I walked to the joining bathroom combing through my hair and brushing my teeth. When I reentered the room I was thinking he’d have gone, but instead found him staring down at an old picture from high school that sat on the dresser.

“When was this?” He didn’t move, just kept staring.

“You don’t remember?” I went about my room, throwing things I’d need into my purse.

“It was a long time ago.” There was sadness in his voice. And there should be. He’s the one who ruined everything.

“If you don’t remember, then obviously it wasn’t that important to you.” I threw the purse over my shoulder and pushed past him to the door. I didn’t make it there though. His hand shot out and caught my wrist. I stopped, but didn’t turn to look at him. I didn’t want to see his face.

“You know that’s not true.” I head him sigh behind me. “Jax, please. We really need to talk.”

“There’s nothing to talk about.” My voice came out a little too quiet for my liking. “It’s my brother and best friend’s wedding tomorrow and I’m here to support them. I’ll be gone in a week, so why bother?” I jerked my wrist from his hand and continued down to the living room where the wedding party was gathered.

“Seriously? How is it that you could possibly be upstairs for 20 minutes and look like a rock star that fast?” Leeana questioned.

“Girl I look like a rock star all the time. I just downplay it to make you feel better about yourself sometimes.” I slung my arm over her shoulder and walked with her out to the car.

It ended up being Mia and Emma in my car while the boys hopped in the back of my brother’s SUV with him and Lee. I followed them to the dress shop, blasting some serious party music, doing my very best to block out the conversation I’d just had in my room.

***

“Girl, if you don’t come out here right now, I’m gonna tell everyone about sophomore year at the Beta house.” Mia’s voice rang through the dressing room as I heard a round of laughter follow.

“Bitch, you better check yourself. That is a no fly zone!” I pulled the blue dress over my body and looked in the mirror. The fabric flowed gently down around my legs as the top hit just right to show off my cleavage but not make me look like a whore. It was very classy; very Leeana.

“Whoa, hold up! What happened? I gotta know! Jax stay in that dressing room.” Tommy’s voice called out to me and I laughed as I check one last time to make sure everything was where it should be.

“Too late. I’m here. Guess you’ll just have to use your imagination.” I moved slowly out of the dressing room into the area where everyone was waiting, Mia and Emma in dresses matching mine in pink and purple. Tommy, dressed in a nice looking suit with a pink tie, was on his knees in front of Mia begging her to spill her guts. She looked down at him amused, but kept her mouth shut as to the happenings from my college life.

It was quiet for a minute as I looked at the mirror in the room. I turned to see the boys I’d grown up with staring at me slack-jawed. It was like there weren’t 2 other girls dressed exactly like me standing right in front of them.

“Close your mouths, you’ll catch flies.” I rolled my eyes. It wasn’t like I wasn’t used to this kind of reaction. Not to brag, it’s just honesty. Leeana finally appeared, though I’ve no idea where she’d disappeared to in the first place.

“I got the shoes!” She lifted her hands, answering my unasked question. We slipped on the strappy heels, did the straps and modeled for her. The seamstress was walking around scoping out any details that might have needed fixing, also keeping an eye on the anxious bride.

“Girl, I’m gonna be wearing this dress all day tomorrow, can we hurry this up please? We’ve got a rehearsal to get to.” I folded my arms over my chest giving her my best, seriously-let’s-go look.

“Look, this is my wedding and you’ll stand there until I’m satisfied.” She responded with her own calm-the-fuck-down stare, though it took only seconds until she smiled and nodded. “Alright, I’m satisfied.”

I rolled my eyes at her as the girls moved to the dressing rooms and Leeana turned to examine the boys’ suits. As I turned to the dressing room, my eyes caught sight of something I was sure had to be a mistake. Bryden stood in front of Lee, decked out in a sleek black suit with a blue tie resting on his chest. The same blue as the dress currently hanging off my body.

I just about fell over before I made a mad dash past Mia to the room I’d changed in. I sat on the small bench and tried to relax. I think someone’s out to get me. I really do. Why would his tie be the same color as my dress? Did that mean I had to be next to him through the wedding? Did it mean I had to take pictures with him? Did it mean I had to dance with him? Shit.

A knock on the door ripped me from my thoughts and I looked up in time to see Mia walk through the door, still in her blue dress.

“JD, what is going on with you?” I let out a small laugh at the nickname, remembering how I’d been dubbed Jack Daniel’s our Freshman year at the Gamma’s end of finals party.

“It’s complicated.”

“Really?” Her eyebrows nearly hit the ceiling.

“No, but it’s still not easy to talk about.”

“You know that you can tell me anything. I mean it’s not like you can’t trust me. I know almost everything about you. Including the sexy tattoo you have on your—”

“Okay I get it. It’s honestly not that I don’t trust you. You know I do. It’s that it’s not a part of my life I want to remember or relive.”

“Girl, as painful as it may be, I’m thinking you don’t really have a choice. It’s staring you in the face.

Maybe it’s time you finally deal with it.”

I gave her the best smile I could muster and watched her leave before I changed back into my street clothes. I knew she was right. I was going to face to face this. But that didn’t mean I had to like it or that it had to happen today.