I Know What's Best For Me

I still remembered the way his long fingers held onto his can of Budweiser; the way his tongue stuck out while he danced alone to some ridiculous French punk song in the middle of the dance floor. He consumed my thoughts completely that night and I remember hoping that I did the same. I remember how close he stood next to me when he introduced himself at the booze table, like he actually knew me personally.

“Hi, I’m John,” He extended his hand out to me, which I gladly shook in return. His voice was cool and calm, much like the Arizona breeze passing through outside in the midst of June. “I see you a lot at these parties but I never got your name.”

“Ashley,” I nodded as I watched his smile turn into a grin. His teeth were just as perfect as every other feature I noticed about him, and that made my heart melt into the pit of my stomach.

“Alright, alright, Ashley,” He paused for a moment and we stood there awkwardly sipping on our drinks. “Do you want to come dance with me?”

I didn’t think that one dance would lead into something more. That was the night John had taken me away to some outskirt desert and the same night that he had asked me to be his girlfriend altogether. We had completely skipped the friendship stage and dove right into a relationship. It seemed quite irrational at first, but I had nothing to lose. John was something – a burst of energy. He was so full of life and wisdom that I couldn’t say no. That night we laid on the windshield of his car, wrapped up in one another and holding hands.