Jeans of a Star

The moment Dave’s hands hit my hips, it was like the alcohol in my body set on fire. Everything I felt was amplified, from the sound of the music playing behind me to the taste of twizzlers in my mouth. All at once, the full effect of Dave hit me.

I forced myself to remain composed, because the last thing I wanted to do was crumble in front of Dave.

His hands stayed on my hips for just a little too long, as if he was afraid I wouldn’t be able to stand without him holding onto me.

I think he must have realized what he was doing, because he pulled his hands away from me in a flash and tucked them deeply into his pockets, while flashing me his trademark Dave smile.

“So, are you enjoying yourself?”

That was a tough question. A really tough question. And it was one that I wasn’t prepared to answer. I hoped that Charity would come to my rescue before I had to actually speak, but of course, she was nowhere to be found.

All I could do was nod my head, still keeping up my smile, and hope that would be the last question that he asked me. My luck had run dry, though, so he continued on.

“Can I get you anything? Do you need a drink?”

Honestly, the last thing I needed was another drink. The one Charity had given me had done plenty to get me tipsy and one more would probably just send me over the edge. I had to say no to him. I just had to. It would definitely be for the best in the long run.

“That would be nice.”

Of course, the vodka already in me came up with wrong answer before I could give the right one, and Dave just smiled at me before walking over to the counter.

I followed carefully behind him, as though I was a terrified child walking up to the dentist’s chair, and watched as he poured me a drink. I couldn’t help but notice that the cup was filled with 7/8 cranberry juice and 1/8 vodka, and I wondered why Dave hadn’t put more in. Was I really acting that drunk?

Whatever the case, it tasted much better than the overdosed drink Charity had given me, so I accepted it with a gracious smile. Dave smiled back at me with his ever-so-charming smile, and I could slowly feel myself breaking down. I didn’t want to open back up to him. I wanted to get the hell out of there and try to forget that he’d ever come back. But there was something about Dave’s smile that pushed right through me and made me want to smile back. I swear, his smile could end the next world war if one ever would happen. His smile could bring Bella Swan back to life.

“How’s it taste?” he asked, shoving his hands in his pockets as he watched me drink.

I pulled the cup from my lips, looking at him with my head tilted. “Weak.”

Dave chuckled, his whole body shaking as he laughed. That was another thing that was so wonderful about him. When he laughed, he laughed with everything he had, and it made you feel like you were actually funny.

“That’s how I like them,” he said, leaning his body against the counter. “Keeps your head in the game.”

Suddenly, it was like I’d forgotten about the nothing that he left with me. There were words that formed sentences and it was like I could actually talk again. I don’t know if it was the vodka, Dave himself, or the fact that I had so much to say, but words were pouring out of me like a hurricane.

“What if I don’t wanna keep my head in the game?” I asked, leaning against the counter same as him, but slowly sipping the drink he had made just for me.

He looked back at me, back still pressed against the granite and his head titled to the side. “What could possibly have my Eleanor stuck on the bench?”

Your Eleanor? Not even close, pal. Even so, I couldn’t help but answer like he’d been there the whole time.

“Just life, I guess,” I said, shrugging my shoulders. “I think I’d just like to feel free for a while.”

Dave nodded his head, looking off somewhere in the distance. “I get that.”

I couldn’t help but look over at him and the far off look in his eyes. It was strange to see him looking that way, because the Dave I knew was always so happy and put together. He looked stressed or worried or something else I couldn’t place, and the old me wanted to ask him what was wrong but the new me knew that it wasn’t who we were anymore.

“If you could go anywhere in the world, where would it be?”

Dave chuckled at my question, and I knew he still remember the old game we used to play. It didn’t make much sense anymore, because Dave could go all of the far off places we named, but I wanted him to come back from whatever planet he had been on.

“I think I’d say Tibet,” he said, looking over at me with that familiar smile. “How about you?”

“New York City,” I said, giving a soft nod of my head. “But if you ask me tomorrow I’ll probably say Australia.”

“Let’s go then. I’ll buy the tickets if you pack the bags.”

I laughed at him, seeing that old familiar Dave once again. “Sounds like a plan.”

It didn’t seem fair that he was still the same after all that time, and it especially wasn’t fair that he thought he could act the same as before. He acted like he didn’t even know that he’d left his old life behind, or if he knew, he was pretending that he didn’t. He was still the same Dave, and that made it so hard for me to pretend that he wasn’t.

I wanted so badly to remember why I was mad at him and act on that anger. If nothing else, I wanted to leave without speaking to him again. I wanted him to know that he couldn’t just pretend that things were the same as before, but I was doing an awful job at that.

I had the whole night to tell Dave how I was feeling, but every time he smiled at me, it just got more and more difficult.