I Know You're Over Thinking Things But I Need This.

Surprisingly, I slept all through the night. I have to remember to thank my mom for that sleeping medication.

I'm seriously not ready for today. I've never been one to enjoy change, ever since my father left. He was so loving and cared about me and my mom so much. we were like a perfect family.

I sighed heavily, sitting up in my bed and running my hand through my hair. It felt greasy and smelled weird so I decided to go take a shower. I turned the hot water on and began removing my clothes. As soon as the bathroom was steamed over, I stepped under the water and let it heat p my entire body. The extreme heat felt so good When all you feel is cold and lifeless.

I turned to face the water and held my scarred up arms under it. It burned like a motherfucker because of some newly healing cuts. I started this at 14, right before my suicide attempt. I still have the scars, one line down each wrist, as hard as i could push. I guarantee that I wouldn't be alive this moment if my mother didn't leave work as early as she did.

I realized how stupid the attempt was. But one side of my brain has always wanted to just die and rot but the other side was hoping someone would come and save me.

I was in the shower for a good 10 minutes before I started to wash my hair and body.

as I was getting out, I heard a knock and them my mom shout. "Wear something a little fancy! Daniel's taking us out to breakfast!" I yelled okay back and heard her shut my bedroom door. I wrapped my lower half with a towel and walked to my dresser, picking out a nice outfit. nothing to fancy.

http://www.polyvore.com/breakfast/set?id=85931126

as soon as i finished, i blow dried my hair, straightened it, brushed my teeth and put on a thick-ish line of black eyeliner and eyeshadow. I at least have to make myself look presentable.

I hurried down stairs and greeted my mom.

"Nicholas I told you something fancy, we're not going to a biker bar!" she complained. "Mom, you're wearing black boots, black leather pants, a black tank top and an upside down cross necklace. AND you're tattoos are showing everywhere." I retorted. She just shrugged and we headed out.

She decided to break the silence on the ride there "So are you excited or happy for me at all?" I sighed. "Of course I'm happy for you. I just dont feel like dealing with a little shit and a man who's probably going to try and tell me what to do." I complained. "I'll make sure he lets you be your own person okay? and we dont even know how old his son is yet so maybe he's the same age as you and likes the same things." she insisted

"if he's not you owe me 30 bucks." I laughed. "and if he is, you have to cook dinner tonight" she smiled at me before turning into the restaurant. "Deal"

We walked through the doors and my mom gave them our last name and they escorted us to the table we were going to be sitting at. just as we went to sit down and wait for her boyfriend and his son, they walked in and my mom called them over.

"Daniel!" she practically squealed like a teenager in love. I could feel my heart warm as he gently picked her up in a bear hug then set her down, grabbing her hands and kissing her forehead. "It's so wonderful to see you, my love."

This man was intimidating. He had long-ish black hair, possible 6'3 and a body build of a wrestler with many tattoos and piercings. He seems nice.

He began walking towards me. "ah, you must be Nick, it's a pleasure to meet you. My name's Daniel" He held his hand out and I shook it. "Oh and how could i forget. This is my son, Craig."

He stepped out of the way and introduced his son. I was paying more attention to my phone but I heard him greet my mother like she was the queen. "it's so nice to meet you Ms. Matthews."

"Nicholas! introduce yourself" my head shot up and i dropped my phone. not because my mom scared me but because of the person who stood in front of me. He had shoulder length black hair, three piercings; two on his bottom lip and one of the top. He was wearing a tight long sleeve shirt and skinny jeans with a pair of vans. I quickly picked up my phone and shook his hand.

"h-hey I'm Nicholas but c-call me Nick" He smiled "I'm Craig".

why the fuck did I stutter?

I realized i had still be shaking his hand and quickly pulled away and sat down, unexpectedly he sits next to me. Allowing my mom to sit with Daniel.

They were so lovey dovey and cute it actually made me want to smack my head into the table.

the waitress came up and took our orders. I settled on some pancakes and water.

"Nick, dear. why dont you eat more?" my mom asked worriedly. "I dont know, just not that hungry." my stomach felt really weird and it made me completely lose my apatite so I just sat back and fucked around on my phone. occasionally i would look up and see Craig smiling or laughing. he had the biggest smile. But i knew something had to be wrong with him.

I decided to stop being so quiet "so when do you guys plan on moving in with us?"

"well Nick, we're going to get their belongings after this."

"Oh.. Okay. Well I'm gonna go to the bathroom. Will you excuse me?" I looked at Craig and he stood up. He put his hand on the table to stand up and his sleeve rose up a bit. revealing scars and healing cuts. I made it a mental note to talk to him about that. I know we only just met but I have to know why he does it.

I walked into the men's bathroom and over to the mirror. why do i feel like shit? were the pancakes bad? I heard the door open and Craig walked in. "y-your mom wanted me to come in an-and tell you that we sh-should get going.."

I just nodded. as he was about to walk out I called for him "Hey, uh. Craig?" HE turned back around. "yeah?". "come're. I need ask you something."

he cautiously walked over, making me chuckle. "Im not going to hurt you. I know I shouldn't ask this right now but why do you harm yourself?" his eyes widened "wh-wh-what do you mean? I-I dont" He tried to walk out but I blocked the door and gently grabbed his arm, pulling up the sleeve and exposing his scars and new cuts. He quickly yanked it away so I pulled my sleeves up. "I just want to know your reason. you can tell me when we get to my- our house."

Craig smiled softly and nodded, following me out of the bathroom.

Time to introduce my home to two almost complete strangers...