Karl the Great

Karl was in his apartment in Astoria. It was probably the end of the fourteenth hour of his deep sleep, when the guy's mobile phone rang. When the sounds of ringtone finally pierced Karl's ears and reached his brain, it was almost too late to answer. Karl pressed the green button and put the device to his ear, not noticing who was calling.

“Karl” – he heard Luke's soft voice and looked at the clock on night stand.

“Fuck, Luke. It's 3 AM. Why the fuck are you calling me?” – Karl couldn't hide annoyance in his voice. When after two minutes he couldn't hear nothing more but just the younger boy's unsteady breathing, the guy continued:

“Luke?”

“Karl... I took some pills” – the youngster finally confessed.

“The fuck I care? Enjoy the ride, Luke. There's nothing else I can say to you” – Karl sighed.

“No, no-o, don't hang up... please” – the boy pleaded – “I-I... I took all of them. Just like mommy did.”

Karl suddenly sat up, his eyes wide open. The thing Luke said meant only one thing. That kid took pills to die, not to get high.

“Get help, you dumbfuck! Call the ambulance!” – Karl panicked.

“I-I... couldn't sle-eep” – Luke stuttered and Karl could hear his silent weeps – “I starte-ed thinki-ing about you-u. Ho-ow great yo-ou are-e... And how mu-uch you ha-a-ate me-e” – Luke started panting and his cry became more audible – “You-u hurt me-e, Karl”

“Luke...” – Karl tried to interrupt the kid, to make him stop talking and convince to get help.

“Tell daddy I love him. I don't want him to hate me, too” – Luke continued after a deep breath, holding back his tears.

“Luke, don't do this. Where are you?” – Karl now was the one begging.

“I dyed my hair ginger.” – Luke hissed loudly and calmed down immediately. – “Karl. Karl. Karl...”

Karl still sat on his bed, his head boiling and not coming up with the way to fix the boy. All he could do was just listen to the younger repeat Karl's name until his voice started to fade with every second and Karl heard a loud crash of a mobile hitting the hard floor. Karl couldn't believe what just happened. He was sure that Luke couldn't have killed himself like his mother did a year ago. After another ten minutes of sitting in the dark, Karl started laughing hysterically.

“No, this is just a dream. Go back to sleep, Karl” – he said to himself, shaking his head.

Little did Karl know, that after few hours he would be woken up again with a call, this time only confirming that he hadn't imagined his last conversation with Luke.

“Karl Kidd!” – he heard Igor's angry voice – “There's your freaking fuck buddy?! Are you with him right now?!”

“What?” – Karl asked confused – “What are you talking about?”

“Don't play dumb with me, you bastard. I'm talking about that stupid-ass kid Luke”

“I'm not fucking with him” – Karl hissed.

“Oh please. Even his father knows you two are fucking friends with benefits” – Igor laughed, still with a hint of fury in his voice.

“I don't know where he is” – Karl said after a pause.

“When reach him or something, because he's fucking late for a photo-shoot with me and he won't answer his phone. I don't have time to fucking wait for him the whole day!”

“I can't help you, Igori. I don't even know where he is”

“You're shitting me, ri..?” – Igor didn't finish – “Wait, my manager is coming”

Karl stayed silent. A huge wave of fear went through his whole body and he remembered his dream, in which Luke called him.

“Karl?” – Igor's voice, this time softer, called Karl out of daydreaming.

“Yeah? Has Luke came?”

“Karl... Luke's dead”

Karl froze and pressed the red button, not wanting to know more, but still could hear Igor's voice saying how Luke took some pills last night. The guy refused to believe that Luke indeed was gone, the thought of him committing suicide couldn't settle in Karl's head. He wasn't able to understand how could Luke do this to Karl – no, he couldn't understand how Luke could do this to himself. For the first time in his life Karl finally realized something important – not everything that people do is meant to hurt Karl Kim. Sometimes they do reckless things because they themselves don't want to feel the pain. They want to get rid of the pain that Karl Kim has caused them.

“I dyed my hair ginger”. One of the last Luke's words to Karl echoed in his head. Karl never liked ginger hair. When Luke once dyed his hair that colour, not knowing that Karl despises it, he got scolded and slapped by the older. By doing it again before his death, this time purposely, Luke took his revenge on Karl for all the times he made the younger cry, for all the times he hurt Luke.

Karl couldn't bear sitting on his bed in the dark any longer. He rushed to the bathroom and sat in the shower, letting warm water make its way down Karl's naked body, covered in cold sweat. Karl felt guilty and pathetic. He hated himself for causing Luke so much pain that it made the youngster end his life. After silently weeping in the shower for two hours, Karl got out of there, hardly feeling his body that had already gone numb. He went back to his bedroom and picked up his phone. With still numb fingers he wrote a text and sent it without thinking twice.

“I'm sorry, Luke. Please come back. You're so beautiful” – the message said.

It was first and the last time Karl showed any sincere affection towards Luke.