Love is Foolish

I really don't know about this chapter and I'd really really appreciate if you can tell me what you think. Thanks!

"Please tell me." Alex looked at her sincerely. His eyes seemed to be begging, pleading for her to tell him.

Something hit her. She was the only one who knew what happened. The only one who knew what was going on through his head.

Alex would obviously tell someone about what happened. Of course she could run away, and she knew she could escape the police for a long time. It wouldn't be the first time.

But something inside her cracked. It was weak and awful but she wanted someone to know. She'd been carrying her secrets, lying and manipulating for 12 long years. It was time to be honest.

She took a breath, looked at Alex and said "What do you want to know?" Alex looked so happy. She admitted to herself, Alexs happiness made her happy.

"Thank you." He said looking completely sincere. "What happened to your arm?"He asked. She sighed.

She showed him both of her wrists and said "Do you mean this or these?" Then she showed him her scarred shoulders.

Alex's face looked shocked. "I'm so sorry. Both."

"Don't apologize. It's a sign of weakness." She said immediately almost by instinct, the words just slipping out.

"Well you see, these tend to happen, as you probably know, when you spend a long time chained. And as to my shoulders, I guess it just happened, like what happened to my stomach and legs."

"What happened?" Alex asked desperately.

"Are you ready for a nice fun long story?" she asked.

"Well I'm sure it's not nice or fun but yes. You can tell me anything."

"I doubt it. I don't even know why I'm trusting you with this bit here goes." Alex nodded.

"One day a sweet happy little twelve year old was walking along the street when suddenly a big scary man came. She saw him take a woman. She tried to escape him, but he hit her and she fainted. The little innocent girl saw it and got scared. She started to cry and point.Without her noticing, he hit her on the head making her faint. She woke up the next day in a big dark room, chained in her wrists. The big scary man came almost every day. He seemed to enjoy cutting into her skin, burning her, punching her, anything that caused pain. She fought him as hard as she could, yelling and shouting. But nothing stopped him. He didn't stop. "

Alex's face was full of empathy as she stared into the wall and talked with a joking air that didn't manage to hide the horror in her words.

" She saw him hurt the woman until she finally died. She tried everything so the little girl wouldn't get hurt. Pity she failed. Well time passed and the girl wasn't so happy. Eventually she begged the man to kill her, stopped trying to live, and was simply empty. Then something happened. The girls parents had noticed her disappearing and didn't seem to like it. Unlike the older woman, the man didn't know anything about her life. He didn't know she had parents that cared. They called the police who started tracking. The man was scared. He took the girl and dragged her around the country, trying to escape the police."

Alex's face was so sad. She didn't seem to notice, to focused in her old hated memories.

"While they were escaping, the man taught the girl so many things about life. He changed her world. He made her strong. He made her powerful. She wasn't weak anymore. She was free. The man was scared he'd die without anyone knowing his secrets, his life. He explained to her the world in a way no one had ever explain. They had the best 8 months ever. Escaping the police together, killing together, living together,seeing all of America. She learned more from him than from anyone in her entire life. He told her how to lie, how to be free of emotions, how to fight, how to be truly strong."

She smiled fondly at the memories.

"But one time, after seeing them take a woman and make her beg as he set her on fire, the girl decided she had enough. She ran away and called the police. The man found her and wasn't quite happy. He explained to her the beauty in pain, in fire and blood. She understood. They tried to escape. But it was too late. The police arrived and surrounded them. The man looked at the police with a smile, took out a gun, flipped them off and shot himself. His last words to her were "You will continue my work. This is your fault they found us. You will do as I say. I may not love you, but you are my daughter." She agreed immediately."

She remembered everything so clearly.

"The police tried to help her but she wouldn't talk. Her parents wanted the innocent, weak, happy girl. Instead they found a scheming, strong girl. Therapy didn't do anything. She spent her years in and out of assylums, problematic schools and physcologists. Finally she left her home and started doing what he dreamt of. She found men, planned carefully, took them to her basement and did like he taught her.She was just as good as him maybe better. She found the beauty in blood and pain. She managed to kill, capture, hurt just as well as him. She never got caught, never made mistakes. And she was strong. She was powerful. Nothing stopped her. And he is proud of me. I know he is. It may be my fault he got caught but I am honoring him. I am his legacy."

Alex looked speechless. Wordlessly he gave her a hug. She stiffened against him, hating whenever people touched her, unless it was in her power. But she relaxed and let herself hug Alex's skinny yet warm and relaxing body.

"I'm so sorry." Alex whispered.

"Don't be. Apologizing is a sign of weakness." She said, the words just slipping out of her mouth. Then she corrected herself and said "Its my fault. I shouldn't have called the police."

Alex released her from the hug and said "Of course it wasn't your fault."

"Of course it was. If I hadn't he would still be alive and we could have been together."

"And then what? You can get better. I can help you. We can do it together. Thank you for telling me all this. I know it was hard."

"Better and weak. Did you know a few days ago I was supposed to kill you? I held the gun in my hands and I didn't. What would he say? He wouldn't exactly be happy." She said angrily.

"Wait you were supposed to kill me? But you didn't?"Alex said. "Why?"

She looked at Alex. He cared. She told him everything and he didn't run away, or judge her.

Maybe he was right. Maybe she could get better. Maybe she could be happy. Maybe she would be happy and satisfied with Alex. Maybe she could stop hurting people. Maybe she could let her past go and look at the future. "I couldn't. I've been wanting to do this, truly for such a long time."

She leant closer and pressed her lips gently on Alexs. They'd kissed before but this was their first really kiss. Their first kiss that wasn't plotting or scheming. To be honest, this was the first time she kissed someone without any hidden motives.

Her hands gently caressed Alex's hair as he held the back of her neck. She let herself soak in the moment, enjoying every second.

She admitted to herself, she loved Alex Gaskarth.

It may be foolish, it may be stupid, he may be angry but she loved him.

And at that moment nothing mattered.