Caged Birds Don't Like to Sing

I woke up late the following day. Feeling groggy, I waited until evening before I finally came downstairs. Walking into the kitchen, I looked around for Jackson. He was nowhere to be found. I continued to search around for him, checking the upstairs, backyard, and basement. I had a feeling I wasn’t going to find him. He has obviously been known to disappear randomly.

I knew I shouldn’t be concerned about it. It was probably just him going off somewhere like he always does. Except his guitar was here. Feeling anxious, so I picked up the phone and dialed in Ben Graupner’s number. I found a stack of emergency numbers that Jackson left me the first day I was here. Ben was near the top of the list.

“Hello?” he answered in a muffled voice. It sounded like he was eating.

“Hey. It’s Marissa. Have you seen Jackson?” I asked, pacing around the kitchen.

“Yeah, he’s right here,” Ben said, confused. The next thing he said wasn’t directed to me. “You didn’t tell her?”

“No. He didn’t,” I answered the question for him before Jackson could reply. “Can I talk to him?”

Ben didn’t say anything back. After a second, I heard Jackson’s voice on the other line. “Hey.”

“Where are you?” I asked, now raiding the fridge. There was nothing to eat in here. The thought of them eating made my mouth water.

“At a diner with Ben,” he answered and I could hear him stuff another bite of food into his mouth.

Of course they are eating without me. My stomach growled. “Could you bring me something back?”

“Yes. What do you want?”

“Anything.”

“Okay. See you soon.”

After I hung up the phone with him, I decided to call Riley. She answered this time and agreed to come over. I felt excited to finally see her just because I wanted to finally remember something of my old life. Even if it did suck.

Before the time Jackson was back, I was letting Riley into the house. She looked around at first and I followed her around to make sure she didn’t touch anything, especially one of the instruments on the wall. She’d be the person to pick it up and accidentally break it. Jackson would be the one to murder her afterwards.

“So what’s with the house out in the middle of nowhere?” she asked mockingly as she ran her fingers over the back of the couch. She was on her way to the kitchen. Once she was in there, she hopped onto the counter and dangled her legs. “Is he planning on killing you out here or something?”

I smiled, remembering Joseph and my conversation. “That’s what I thought at first, too.”

I climbed into one of the stools and picked up an apple from the bowl in the middle of the table. I tossed it back and forth between my palms before taking a big bite to subdue my hunger.

“So where’s the hubby?” She asked, still peeking around the kitchen. She picked up the bottle of whiskey and smirked. “You drink now?”

I shrugged, throwing the apple up and catching it repetitively. “That’s his. And he’s out at lunch with a friend.”

“A friend,” she said with air quotes and a cackle. She tried to take off the cap on the bottle. It must have been on tight.

“It’s a guy.”

“Even better,” she laughed.

She was still messing with the lid. Her legs were on the counter and crouched. The bottle was between her knees and she held onto the neck of with her hands. Her teeth were around the lid. Jackson probably super glued it so I couldn’t get into it again.

“You shouldn’t be drinking if you’re driving home,” I warned.
She made a ‘hmmph’ noise and tossed the bottle to the side. “So are you going to give me a tour or something?” She hopped off the counter and started to walk around. I got out of my seat and followed her.

She was already up the stairs. She went in the direction of the bathroom. She popped her head in and looked at me, concerned. “What the fuck happened in here?”

I looked over her shoulder. I forgot about the bathtub incident. We cleaned up the water, but left the bathtub. We were going to have some other people help us move it out another time. For now, it was the least of our concerns.

“One of the feet fell off while I was in it,” I explained. She howled with laughter.

“That would happen to you,” she said as she went into my bedroom. She sat on the bed and moved up and down to make the springs squeak. “Nice bed.”

“Thanks.”

I asked her about work and she explained everything in detail. I started picking up some clothes off the ground and putting them back in drawers. She said how awesome it was to be able to pick up guys easily and take them home. Yep, same old Riley. It wouldn’t doubt me if she had some STD that she didn’t know about. As mean as it sounds, it could be true. She slept around way too much. Prime example of how easy it is to get a disease. And if I ever cautioned her about getting tested, she would just yell at me or something. I should tell Jackson. Maybe then he would get the crazy notion that sleeping together was a good idea.

After a little bit of silence after her wild stories, she said, “You never told me the guy’s name.”

I looked up from the drawer that I was pushing my shirts into. “Jackson.” I focused my attention back down and shoved the drawer door closed.

“Hmm. Good name to scream out during climax.” She smiled wryly and winked. Then she pretended to moan, “Oh Jackson. Jackson.”

I slapped her arm. “We’re not sleeping together,” I insisted once again. With Riley it was all about sex. She thought every single opposite gender relationship had to be formed around sex. Nothing else.

“You will be eventually. It’s just a matter of time. Unless he’s hideous or something.” She lolled back on the bed and crossed her arms behind her head. “Sex is better with an older guy. Trust me.”

I rolled my eyes. Right at that moment, I heard the front door open. “That’s him now,” I cited. I
started to crave food again. Either that or the pit of my stomach was tensing up with nerves. I didn’t know what to expect from this meeting between Jackson and Riley.

“Let’s see this bad boy,” she said, propping herself up. She rubbed her hands together and looked as if she was on the prowl.

Minutes later, Jackson walked into the room. He had a white Styrofoam box in his hand. “Here,” he offered. “It’s a Reuben. I had one and it was really good so I thought you’d like it.”

I hungrily took the sandwich box and sat on the bed beside Riley. I quickly opened it up and took a big bite. When I looked back up, Jackson’s eyes were moving from me to Riley.

“Who’s this?” he asked, now staring at me. Riley’s eyes were still on him.

“I’m Riley,” Riley introduced, standing up with a bounce in her step. “Marissa’s best friend.”

“I’m Jackson. Marissa’s fiance,” he greeted.

Riley quickly turned back to me, mouthed an, “Ow-ow.” and turned back to Jackson. “Nice to meet ya, good looking.”

Jackson ignored the comment and held out his hand. She shook it, then went back and sat on the bed. “So,” she started to say, crossing her legs. “How are you liking my friend here?” She patted my back. I looked up from my sandwich. Jackson was leaned against the wall.

“Oh, she’s great,” Jackson said casually. I couldn’t tell if he was being honest or saying it just to avoid conflict between all of us.

“In bed?”

I nudge Riley’s side. “Quiet,” I mumbled through my full mouth.

“We haven’t slept together,” Jackson made known. He looked at me immediately after and raised an eyebrow. I scoffed and looked away, digging into my sandwich some more.

“Ah, so it’s your fault,” Riley said playfully. I felt my cheeks blush.

“No,” I denied. “We’re still getting to know each other. Right, Jackson?”

“Yeah,” Jackson said unconvincingly. I was going to kill him after this. I just wanted to eat in peace.

With that, he walked out of the room and shut the door behind him.

Riley turned towards me. “Why don’t you put out? He’s fucking hot.”

“I’m not like that,” I hissed. “I don’t sleep with just anyone.”

She made a ‘psh] noise. “You better keep him pleased. He probably could have an affair like that.” She snapped her fingers in front of my face.

“He wouldn’t.” Then I quickly added on, “And it’s not like I would care. We’re not even close like that.” I felt a little guilty saying that. We just made out last night, that’s pretty close if I do say so myself. But I wasn’t still not sure how I feel. And I had no idea what was going through his head.

What she said was awfully true though. Like at the concert, for instance. So many girls were there, some extremely beautiful. They all were dying to even be looked at by him. He could easily just go off and bang one of them one night then come back home and I’d never even know. The thought made me woozy, thus confusing my feelings even more.

“You never know. If you don’t sex him up soon, I might.” Her voice was joking, but I still didn’t trust her. Considering what happened with Chase.

“Don’t,” I exploded. I lost it a little more than I had wanted to. I sat down my sandwich. “Seriously.”

“I won’t,” she laughed. She opened her phone then said, “It’s almost time for work. Nice to see you.” She stood up and ruffled my hair.

“Bye.”

Later that night, I was in Jackson’s room, curled in the big, fluffy blanket that I loved. I took one of his pillows and was laying on the floor as he sat in the rocking chair. We were talking for a few random things for a while. When conversation died, I stared up at the ceiling and thought in silence for a moment.

“So that’s the twenty-five year old friend of yours,” he guessed out of the blue. I nodded my head. “She seemed--”

“Sleazy?” I finished his sentence. “I know.”

“Why do you hang out with her?” He asked in a serious tone. On the same note, however, his voice was caring. He used this tone a lot when he wanted to delve into deeper conversations. I guessed it was a way to manipulate the person. It always worked on me.

“She’s the only person I have.” I shifted around on the ground and covered my mouth in the blankets. Only my nose and eyes peered out. I was getting uncomfortable again.

“You should invest in some new friends. Ones that really care about you.”

“Like who?” I asked. I had no one out here.

“Well,” he said, getting off the chair and kneeling down next to me. “You have me.” Of course. He even knew that we had no one out here either.

I stared up and my eyes followed him as his lips touched the tip of my nose. He pulled the blanket down a bit and touched his lips to mine briefly.

He laid beside me and I tossed over some of the blankets to him. “You don’t seem very happy around her. You two seem distant.”

“We kind of are,” I confessed, rolling over on my side so I could look at him. Our faces were inches apart. “It’s been weird since high school.”

“What happened in high school?” he asked. His green eyes scanned my face in attempt to read me. His expression seemed to have more care this time. He looked like he honestly wanted to know. It’s been his goal the whole time for me to open up.

I took a sigh and squirmed a bit under the blankets. “She...” I started to say, I scratched the back of my head and let my eyes float around the room before I continued on. I swallowed hard. I never told anyone about this before. I usually liked to avoid the discussion altogether. Even though it pained me terribly. “She slept with my boyfriend. Multiple times, I think. They were dating for a while behind my back. I eventually found out, but they didn’t stop.”

“I’m sorry,” he spoke sincerely. I closed my eyes and swallowed the lump in my throat. It still hurt to think about. Even though it was four years ago. It still made me clench my fist and grind my teeth together. Cheating is one of the biggest betrayals you can commit in a relationship. Even worse when it’s with your best friend.

His hand picked up a piece of my hair that was in my face was placed it behind my ear. I opened my eyes back up, but didn’t look at him directly. “Cheating is never okay in a relationship. Once you found out, you should have dumped him.”

“I know,” I breathed. But I thought I loved him. And, deep down, I thought he loved me, too. I was dead wrong. He just used me. I don’t know what for, I didn’t do much. I was just a placeholder.

It comforted me to hear Jackson say that cheating was wrong. It made me feel more confident that he wouldn’t do it to me. And that’s the kind of reassurance I needed.

“This is just my opinion, but, I think you should try to forget about her. I can see the past is still bugging you. Maybe it’s because she’s still around you and is reminding you of it constantly.”

He made sense. Maybe I should just forget about her. It probably would help a lot because whenever I looked at her face, I thought of the pain she caused me when I was younger. It surprised me how much Jackson actually understood about my situation. He made sense when it came to the advice, too.

I moved closer to him and his arm slung around my shoulders. The other arm held around my waist. I tucked my head under his arm and closed my eyes. I sighed. I didn’t feel very comfortable. Admitting all of that made me feel nauseous.

“I’m glad you’re starting to be more open with me,” he stated. His hand was petting the back of my head.

“Yeah,” I muttered back. I wasn’t being completely honest. Not yet. He still doesn’t know how brutal Chase was. And how sick it made me feel.

The next day was Jackson’s turn to sleep in. Even in the early afternoon, he was still on the floor of his bedroom, asleep. My back hurt a bit from sleeping there, but I didn’t mind. I loved that soft blanket. It was worth a little back pain. I even pulled Jackson’s comforter off of his bed and put it on him in place of the blanket. I walked downstairs with the softness wrapped around me.

As I made a cup of coffee, I looked at the front door as I heard the squeal of metal. Through the mail flap, a few envelopes fell onto the floor. I set down my mug and picked them up. I placed them back in the kitchen as I skimmed through them.

Most were a bills and promotional stuff for movies. One that caught my eye was one that addressed to Jackson specially. I think what made it stand out was that it wasn’t a business envelope, it was a regular one. That’s sketchy, he never gets mail that isn’t a bill or work-related. It said it was from his parents. Being the curious person I am, I opened it. Yes, I know it’s illegal to open mail that isn’t yours. But I really doubted he would care.

I unfolded the letter and read the short message:

Dear Son,

Here’s the other half of your share of the money from the business deal with Marissa’s parents. Don’t spend it all in one place. Thanks for your help with this mess. Good luck with the "marriage."

Love,
Your Mother and Father

My eyebrows lowered. I placed the letter on the counter and looked in the envelope again. I pulled out numerous dollar bills that amounted to a lot of money. I bit my lip. Then refolded the letter and put it back in the envelope with the money. I licked it closed so it didn’t look like I had opened it.