I Can't Believe How Bad You Got Me

When Kirstie came back, Riley followed her in with Logan nuzzled into her little arms. Kirstie had the other two boys too. Ryan smiled and held out his arms for his wife and nephews. I sat up and took Riley into my lap. Making sure she had a firm hold on her little bother, I started leaving soft kisses all over her cheeks. It caused her to giggle and squeal… along with her brother. Aw, I missed them!

I didn’t want to say anything about Jake or ask about him in front of the kids. They probably already know something’s up if I wasn’t there when they woke up this morning. When the boys seemed to settle so that Ryan and Riley could handle them, I asked Kirstie if we could talk in the kitchen. She agreed and walked out there with me.

“Jake’s fine,” was the first thing that came from her mouth.

“But… I…”

“He’s being a butthead, Ky. You should stay away a little longer to make him realize what he’d lose if he didn’t change his program,” she went on.

“But I just… miss him,” I sighed and ran my hand through my hair.

She looked back at me for a few extra seconds, studying my features. I knew she could tell I missed him. Her features softened as well.

“If you want to go talk to him, Ry and I will watch the kids,” she spoke softly.

I nodded my head and… took her up on her offer. I just… needed to see him. I didn’t know what I was going to say to him or what I expected him to say, but… I needed to do this.

When I pulled up, seeing the sight of his truck made me nervous. Honestly, I wasn’t sure if he was going to be home. He was though… and now my heart was racing. While taking in a deep breath, I got out… and walked inside. I expected to find him on the lower level. He wasn’t though. I wandered up to the next and went right into our room. That’s exactly where I found him.

He was curled up in bed… on my side of the bed. The blankets were wrapped around him tightly and my pillowed cradled tightly against his chest. As I opened the door more, he jerked his head up and looked at me. His eyes looked so sad. My poor Jakey. I wanted to go rushing over to him and wrap my arms around him and never let him go. I held that back though. Without saying anything, I went over to his side of the bed to sit, facing him.

“Hey,” was what I started with.

He grunted out the same thing, keeping his eyes low. Well, I wasn’t going to start this. You know what you have to do! Maybe this… wasn’t such a great idea after all…

“The… boys were up all night,” he muttered.

“Someone’s sleepy,” I managed to put on a smile. He was going to be grouchy. I didn’t want to push him too much right now. To try and ease this, I moved closer and hooked my arms around his middle. He didn’t fight it. He nuzzled into me. I knew nothing had been solved, but I still reached down and pressed my lips to his forehead. While he got comfortable, my fingers raked through his soft curls.

“I’m sorry,” came out of him.

“For?” he needed to say it.

“Not realizing how much you had to do with all four kids by yourself,” he answered.

“And it may have been easier if…” I couldn’t help but let my smile curl across my lips.

“You were there with me,” he huffed teasingly and glanced up at me. “Since all the boys were crying, Riley got up and she was mad because she couldn’t sleep. Once I’d get one of the boys calmed down, then another one would need something and then Riley needed attention and…”

“It’s not easy by yourself,” I butted in. I felt bad that he had to do all of that, but… at least he gets it now!

“It’s not,” he agreed.

“I don’t want you to quit doing what you’re doing. I just want you to maybe find a better way so that you can be home more. We can build you a gym here so you could work out… maybe even build you a better track in the backyard. I can handle everything for a few hours, but…” I trailed off shrugging, hoping he got it.

“I’m going to change things for you guys. Kirstie told me that you and the kids were the greatest thing that had ever happened to me and… she’s so right,” he replied.

“Aw, Jake,” I cooed.

“I love you guys so much. You being gone last night… was the worst,” he sighed and tightened his arms around my middle.

“I didn’t want to leave, but you… made me so mad,” I couldn’t help but giggle.

“I’m sorry,” he chuckled as well.

“I love you,” I added, kissing his forehead once more.

“I love you too,” he smiled up at me with that adorable sparkle back in his eyes.

After this, he curled up against me more. He was slowly drifting off to sleep. I wanted to go get our babies back so we could all cuddle together. Jake had a rough night though. I’m glad he realized what was going on… and we can move on and have our beautiful family back again.