I'm Not Okay

I was released from the hospital the very next day. The doctor, Dr. Moore, prescribed me some medication to deal with the fainting, but I really didn’t care. I just wanted to get out of that hospital. I was so sick of hospital and doctors and them always telling me bad news. I-I just wanted to scream, but then screaming would probably give me a worse headache then I already have.

I sighed, as I rubbed my head with my right hand as Gerard grabbed my right and he pulled us down the street towards downtown Newark. I really couldn’t help but smile. He seemed ‘at home’ in his hometown. But then again, Gerard never really acted famous, none of the guys did. And at that second it dawned on me, we didn’t go to breakfast.

“Gerard, we didn’t have breakfast!” He stopped dead in the middle of the sidewalk and looked at me like I was crazy.

“What do you mean? We had breakfast before we left-?” He pointed back over his shoulder towards the direction we had just walked from.

“No, yesterday. With Frankie, Mikey and Ray.” Bob had gone home to Chicago to visit with his family for most of the break but come and spend some time with us when it got close to time to write the new album. Gerard just nodded.

“It’ alright, I called them, they even came and saw you.”

“Really?” I had honestly thought they didn’t like me. Or at least they don’t like the age difference. I know a bunch of people don’t like that, like that old couple that’s walking down the other side of the street, their giving Gerard a dirty look. Please if they only knew how innocent this ‘relationship’ really was. I would do something to really piss them off but I’m just not in the mood to. I’m really not in the mood to do anything. All I want to do is go home and lie on the bed and go back to sleep and wake up and find none of this has happened, not a single good this has happened since the fourth.

I suddenly feel something wet slid across my cheek. I look up at Gerard and his tongue is hanging out. I smile, well maybe just one thing.