I Think I Love Him
A Secret Before The Date
"Hey dad?"
"Yes Anthony?"
"So after school today can you take me and Zachary to the mall?"
"Your taking him to the movies?"
"Yea and to go get something to eat before, and maybe after, and I wanted to go shopping to."
"How much you need?"
"I have the tickets already, and money for like the popcorn and stuff. I think I'll have enough for dinner and shopping..."
"Here..."
My dad, like I said before, is a sheep following the herd. I don't normally ask him for money, he pays me for chores, yard work, and any odd jobs he doesn't want to do. I always pay him back, even tho he prefers me not to. Its so much easier to have a job and not have to worry about asking for money. My dad hands three twentys and pats me on the shoulder.
"Thanks dad-"
He dosent let go of the ends of the bills.
"Anthony. I'm going to ask you this once."
"What is it?"
He looks sullen at me, A look of just, concern or...worry?
"Anthony, Is this a date?"
"Excuse me??"
I've never seen my dad to be homophobic...
"Is you taking Zachary out to the movies, buying him dinner and shopping for him, and then knowing you your gonna take him out to get ice cream, or forzen yogurt, are you taking him on a date?"
I sorta feel my heart sink. I never really thought about it. I do know that I wanted to take him to the movies, and we both have been dying to see Pacific Rim for months now, but I did want to take him shoppingl, buy things for him, and take him out to dinner and ice cream. I fought hard to get the midnight tickets, and from what my dad did say, It looks like a date. But do I want it to be? Was that my plan? I mean, I threw on his favorite outfit of mines, did my hair and tried on at least five different perfumes. Is this a date?
"No, its not."
He nods slighty and sighs.
"Alright then"
I take the $60 and put it in my Batman Wallet along with my original hundred. My mom drops me off and I walk to the bus drop off zone. I wait behind bus line 21 for him. When the bus pulls up I step back and smile. I watch as all the kids get off the bus and at the end of the line...I see him smiling back. I hug him tightly and we both laugh.
"Hey Zacky"
"Hey Anthony"
We walk into the school and put our stuff away. I still think about this morning. Everytime I look at him I wonder what he thinks. Did he take it as a date? Do I want him to think its a date? He has a great smile I'll add, and I love seeing it. I'm glad he's showing it off today.
"Excited for tonight?"
Its art class and where doing a partner painting. Zachary runs back to the sinks to fill up our paint holders. I planned to do a bamboo backround and Zachary planned to do two pandas. He's one fantastic artist when it comes to people and animals, but he cant do backround or senery for shit. I'm fantastic at backrounds and senery, but cant draw a stick figure to save my life. So together, we make some kick ass art.
"Are you kidding me? Ive been waiting months to see this movie, and now we get to go see it, EARLY!!! Hell yes I'm excited!"
I smile. I finish the leaves on my bamboo tree.
"I'm glad. I was up for about tree days straight trying to get those tickets!"
He looks over at me as he paints in the bellys of the pandas.
"Why'd you work so hard?! We could have always seen it tomorrow like everyone else?"
"Well Zachary..." I nuzzle into his shoulder "Were not like everyone else"
I swear I can see him blushing.
"And I sorta wanted to make it special you know? Something we've each been waiting for, for a long time. Even before we meet!"
"So bring us at night before anyone else gets to see it makes it special?"
"Well when you add dinner and shopping it dose! What you complaining?"
He laughs and I pour more green paint into the holder and start in on the sky. I watch Zachary delicatly paint in the eyes of the pandas and the details of the face. I grin and dot the stars.
"Why would I complain? I've never been happier..."
He bats me with his beautiful green eyes. I feel a knot form in my stomach, my heart fire up. Does he think its a date? Then again, I dont even know if he's gay...then again, I dont even know if I myself am gay, or staright. All I know is that I like Zachary, a lot. And maybe a little more then a friend. I think I do...
"Well I'm glad..."
"HEY!!!"
I swipe my green paintbrush against his face making him jump.
"Hahaha!!!! Wait a second!!"
He hits me back across the nose with his black paint. I paint a smily face using the original streak on his cheek and he dose a heart on mines.
"Mr. Carter! Mr. Johnson!! Do NOT missuse the art supplies!!!"
"Sorry Mrs. Hill" we both say in unison.
Mrs. Hill's a good art teacher, she's not a boring hard ass like the rest of them.
"Go wash yourselves off would you? Take the pass"
"Yes Mrs. Hill"
We get up and walk to the bathroom, as we go out the door Jason yells after us.
"The queers are gonna go give each other bathroom blowjobs!!!"
Everyone started to laugh and egg him on. Mrs. Hill tried to tell them to be quiet, but we where already out of the room before she could do anything. When we got to the bathroom I could see the sadness in Zacharys eyes. I come up behind him and hug him.
"Don't pay attention to them, they can go fuck themselves. There just-"
"I know. Douche bags..."
Turning on the water we both wash the paint off our faces. I check in the mirror to make sure.
"You ok?"
"Yea I'm fine"
"Eh come here..."
"Why?"
"You got a little something..."
I lick my thumb and rub the paint off the side of his lip. I let my fingers slowly drop down from his face and smile. He smiles back and blushes.
"Thank you..."
"Mmhmm, come on, lets get back to class"
The rest of the day ends quickly, and we make our way home. As we walk threw the front door we run up to my room.
"Just set your stuff down over there, we wont be needing to carry it with us."
We throw our bags to the closet and shut the door.
"When's your dad gonna be home?"
I turn on my laptop and pull up my sheet of music.
"In about a hour...which leaves me enough time to show you this...Sit down on the bed and close your eyes alright?"
"Uhh ok? What you gonna show me?"
"Its a secret, a suprise. But you have to promise me you can't laugh, you can't tell anyone else or I swear to god I will kill you."
Zachary smiles and sits on the bed, closing his eyes I go to my closet and pull out a guitar case. As I unzip it I idea passes in my head. What if I just kissed him instead? I imagined it as I thought it, but I couldn't picture the outcome. I decide against it and sit next to him. I tighten the strings and do a few plucks. I turn the laptop towrds me and look over the sheet of music for a second.
"Ok...Open your eyes, just know, this is my 3rd biggest secret."
Zachary opens his eyes and covers his mouth.
"This, is your big secret?"
"What did I say about laughing!?!?"
"I'm not!! But its not much of a secret..."
"To me it is, not even my family knows, only my Aunt and you..."
He smiles cutely. So I play the guitar, have for years and me and Zachary are in band together, he plays the pretty viollin as you may know, the guitar, I play electric and acoustic. But my secret is, that I play the red neck version of the guitar...
"I will admit, I would have never guessed you to play the Banjo."
Yep. The Banjo.
"But it's a little embaressing. I mean..."
I play a little bit for him and he smiles and giggles.
"Ok I'm done!" I get up to walk away
"No come on, Please? I like it, let me hear more!"
I look over my shoulder and roll my eyes grinning. I sit back down and scroll threw my music list and hand it too him.
"Pick me a song, and I'll cover it"
He smiles
"Thank you!"
"Yea yea yea, now pick a song before my dad gets home would you?"
He choses Piggy Bank by Never Shout Never, from the Harmony album. I look over at him
"Nice pick, one of my best songs on this thing"
"Haha, of course. Now play for me!"
We sit in my room as I play away, Zachary sits and watches and I even let him take a turn at learning, he should stick with the viollin to be fully honest but he wasn't that bad. I put it away right as my dad pulls into the drive way. I turn to look at Zachary.
"You tell no one got it?"
"I wouldn't even dream of it."
I press my head against him
"I trust you, its a secret...."
Zachary blushes slightly and nods
"I shall take it to the grave..."
"Yes Anthony?"
"So after school today can you take me and Zachary to the mall?"
"Your taking him to the movies?"
"Yea and to go get something to eat before, and maybe after, and I wanted to go shopping to."
"How much you need?"
"I have the tickets already, and money for like the popcorn and stuff. I think I'll have enough for dinner and shopping..."
"Here..."
My dad, like I said before, is a sheep following the herd. I don't normally ask him for money, he pays me for chores, yard work, and any odd jobs he doesn't want to do. I always pay him back, even tho he prefers me not to. Its so much easier to have a job and not have to worry about asking for money. My dad hands three twentys and pats me on the shoulder.
"Thanks dad-"
He dosent let go of the ends of the bills.
"Anthony. I'm going to ask you this once."
"What is it?"
He looks sullen at me, A look of just, concern or...worry?
"Anthony, Is this a date?"
"Excuse me??"
I've never seen my dad to be homophobic...
"Is you taking Zachary out to the movies, buying him dinner and shopping for him, and then knowing you your gonna take him out to get ice cream, or forzen yogurt, are you taking him on a date?"
I sorta feel my heart sink. I never really thought about it. I do know that I wanted to take him to the movies, and we both have been dying to see Pacific Rim for months now, but I did want to take him shoppingl, buy things for him, and take him out to dinner and ice cream. I fought hard to get the midnight tickets, and from what my dad did say, It looks like a date. But do I want it to be? Was that my plan? I mean, I threw on his favorite outfit of mines, did my hair and tried on at least five different perfumes. Is this a date?
"No, its not."
He nods slighty and sighs.
"Alright then"
I take the $60 and put it in my Batman Wallet along with my original hundred. My mom drops me off and I walk to the bus drop off zone. I wait behind bus line 21 for him. When the bus pulls up I step back and smile. I watch as all the kids get off the bus and at the end of the line...I see him smiling back. I hug him tightly and we both laugh.
"Hey Zacky"
"Hey Anthony"
We walk into the school and put our stuff away. I still think about this morning. Everytime I look at him I wonder what he thinks. Did he take it as a date? Do I want him to think its a date? He has a great smile I'll add, and I love seeing it. I'm glad he's showing it off today.
"Excited for tonight?"
Its art class and where doing a partner painting. Zachary runs back to the sinks to fill up our paint holders. I planned to do a bamboo backround and Zachary planned to do two pandas. He's one fantastic artist when it comes to people and animals, but he cant do backround or senery for shit. I'm fantastic at backrounds and senery, but cant draw a stick figure to save my life. So together, we make some kick ass art.
"Are you kidding me? Ive been waiting months to see this movie, and now we get to go see it, EARLY!!! Hell yes I'm excited!"
I smile. I finish the leaves on my bamboo tree.
"I'm glad. I was up for about tree days straight trying to get those tickets!"
He looks over at me as he paints in the bellys of the pandas.
"Why'd you work so hard?! We could have always seen it tomorrow like everyone else?"
"Well Zachary..." I nuzzle into his shoulder "Were not like everyone else"
I swear I can see him blushing.
"And I sorta wanted to make it special you know? Something we've each been waiting for, for a long time. Even before we meet!"
"So bring us at night before anyone else gets to see it makes it special?"
"Well when you add dinner and shopping it dose! What you complaining?"
He laughs and I pour more green paint into the holder and start in on the sky. I watch Zachary delicatly paint in the eyes of the pandas and the details of the face. I grin and dot the stars.
"Why would I complain? I've never been happier..."
He bats me with his beautiful green eyes. I feel a knot form in my stomach, my heart fire up. Does he think its a date? Then again, I dont even know if he's gay...then again, I dont even know if I myself am gay, or staright. All I know is that I like Zachary, a lot. And maybe a little more then a friend. I think I do...
"Well I'm glad..."
"HEY!!!"
I swipe my green paintbrush against his face making him jump.
"Hahaha!!!! Wait a second!!"
He hits me back across the nose with his black paint. I paint a smily face using the original streak on his cheek and he dose a heart on mines.
"Mr. Carter! Mr. Johnson!! Do NOT missuse the art supplies!!!"
"Sorry Mrs. Hill" we both say in unison.
Mrs. Hill's a good art teacher, she's not a boring hard ass like the rest of them.
"Go wash yourselves off would you? Take the pass"
"Yes Mrs. Hill"
We get up and walk to the bathroom, as we go out the door Jason yells after us.
"The queers are gonna go give each other bathroom blowjobs!!!"
Everyone started to laugh and egg him on. Mrs. Hill tried to tell them to be quiet, but we where already out of the room before she could do anything. When we got to the bathroom I could see the sadness in Zacharys eyes. I come up behind him and hug him.
"Don't pay attention to them, they can go fuck themselves. There just-"
"I know. Douche bags..."
Turning on the water we both wash the paint off our faces. I check in the mirror to make sure.
"You ok?"
"Yea I'm fine"
"Eh come here..."
"Why?"
"You got a little something..."
I lick my thumb and rub the paint off the side of his lip. I let my fingers slowly drop down from his face and smile. He smiles back and blushes.
"Thank you..."
"Mmhmm, come on, lets get back to class"
The rest of the day ends quickly, and we make our way home. As we walk threw the front door we run up to my room.
"Just set your stuff down over there, we wont be needing to carry it with us."
We throw our bags to the closet and shut the door.
"When's your dad gonna be home?"
I turn on my laptop and pull up my sheet of music.
"In about a hour...which leaves me enough time to show you this...Sit down on the bed and close your eyes alright?"
"Uhh ok? What you gonna show me?"
"Its a secret, a suprise. But you have to promise me you can't laugh, you can't tell anyone else or I swear to god I will kill you."
Zachary smiles and sits on the bed, closing his eyes I go to my closet and pull out a guitar case. As I unzip it I idea passes in my head. What if I just kissed him instead? I imagined it as I thought it, but I couldn't picture the outcome. I decide against it and sit next to him. I tighten the strings and do a few plucks. I turn the laptop towrds me and look over the sheet of music for a second.
"Ok...Open your eyes, just know, this is my 3rd biggest secret."
Zachary opens his eyes and covers his mouth.
"This, is your big secret?"
"What did I say about laughing!?!?"
"I'm not!! But its not much of a secret..."
"To me it is, not even my family knows, only my Aunt and you..."
He smiles cutely. So I play the guitar, have for years and me and Zachary are in band together, he plays the pretty viollin as you may know, the guitar, I play electric and acoustic. But my secret is, that I play the red neck version of the guitar...
"I will admit, I would have never guessed you to play the Banjo."
Yep. The Banjo.
"But it's a little embaressing. I mean..."
I play a little bit for him and he smiles and giggles.
"Ok I'm done!" I get up to walk away
"No come on, Please? I like it, let me hear more!"
I look over my shoulder and roll my eyes grinning. I sit back down and scroll threw my music list and hand it too him.
"Pick me a song, and I'll cover it"
He smiles
"Thank you!"
"Yea yea yea, now pick a song before my dad gets home would you?"
He choses Piggy Bank by Never Shout Never, from the Harmony album. I look over at him
"Nice pick, one of my best songs on this thing"
"Haha, of course. Now play for me!"
We sit in my room as I play away, Zachary sits and watches and I even let him take a turn at learning, he should stick with the viollin to be fully honest but he wasn't that bad. I put it away right as my dad pulls into the drive way. I turn to look at Zachary.
"You tell no one got it?"
"I wouldn't even dream of it."
I press my head against him
"I trust you, its a secret...."
Zachary blushes slightly and nods
"I shall take it to the grave..."