Pinky Promises

When the sun came up I growled and put a pillow over my head to try and block it out. I wasn't ready to have to get up and deal with the world just yet, I wanted to continue to just lay there and be still. I could hear Jimmy's breathing but I wasn't sure if he was asleep or not. Sometimes he pretended to be asleep just so he could stay a little bit longer, which I never got. He could have stayed forever if that's what he wanted.

I closed my eyes again trying to will myself to catch a few more z's but before I really could Jimmy's phone started to ring from the floor. After the first chorus of "If you want my body, and you think I'm sexy" Jimmy groaned and stuck his hand out. I leaned down and grabbed the phone then stuck it in his hand.

"Hello?" He asked, though the 'h' was silent due to his voice being full of sleep.

I rolled off the couch and made my way to the bathroom, checking my hair and makeup as I walked in front of the mirror. God damn raccoon eyes. I wiped the eyeliner and mascara off and then attempted to fix the mop of hair but when I couldn't get it right I decided there was no reason to look my best and went about my
business.

"Layla?" Jimmy's voice asked before he fully came up the stairs.

"Yeah?" I asked coming out of the bathroom.

"That was work. I gotta go...I guess one of the guys couldn't make it in, he's sick or whatever..honestly I don't know and I don't care."

"Are you okay to go in? You were pretty messed up last night." I met him at the top of the stairs.

"I'm fine." He said quietly.

"Can I ask you something?"

He nodded.

"What were you on last night? You said you weren't drunk you were just fucked up. What'd you do?"

Jimmy didn't want to answer me and that meant I didn't want to know. I nodded my head then reached out and wrapped my arms around him, pulling him closer to me. His head was level with my chest as I stood on a step higher than him.

"I'm sorry." He mumbled.

"Didn't we get through all the apologies and stuff last night? Or don't you remember?"

"I remember... I just...I let you down. I let me down too, but I really let you down. Didn't I?"

"Of course not. Jimmy.... addiction...sometimes it happens. It's fine. I mean no, it's not fine, but it's not as big of a deal as you think. I understand, is what I'm trying to say. It's hard."

Jimmy's expression didn't change and I kissed his forehead. He looked up at me and smiled. "Have I ever told you how much I love you?" He asked.

I grinned. "Yeah, I think so, but it's still nice to hear it."

"Well I'll tell you a hundred times a day if you want." He said leaning up to kiss me.

"Good because I'll never get tired of hearing you say that."

After a few more minutes of kisses and talking Jimmy finally pulled away and said he had to go. I didn't want him to, he should have told them he was also sick and couldn't make it, but I walked him to the front door anyway.

"So, I'll come over after work if you want." He said.

"Well duh. Of course I do."

He grinned. "Alright, that's cool. I'll see you then?"

I nodded and gave him one more kiss then a hug that I didn't want to get out of. "See you then." I said.

After he left I wandered around my house feeling a little bit lost. I wasn't sure what to do with myself except for having to clean and then mail out a few bills and that didn't take me long to do either. Soon I found myself flopped over on the couch letting my mind drift.

It always used to be that I couldn't wait for Jimmy to get home from work because I missed my best friend and wanted someone to hang out with. Now however, I was missing him because he was a much bigger part of the play. Though....

Was he my boyfriend? He hadn't asked to be. I wasn't sure if it was just something that went without saying or if we really needed to talk about things. Then there was the question of 'were we going to tell the others or not'? I mean, they already knew we had hooked up but I had went out of my way to make it seem like it just wasn't a big deal.

Then there was Matt. I grumbled a few choice words about how he handled things then picked up my phone. He had said he didn't mean to be a dick and that he was only looking out for Jimmy, but did he really think I was that evil? Maybe I had seemed like it.

"Hello?" He answered on the third ring.

"Hey...what are you doin'?" I asked casually.

"Working on the truck and waiting for Dillon and Charlie to show up. Those fuckers left half hour ago just to go grab some beers and now they're not answering their phone. Figures." His tone wasn't angry but it wasn't friendly either.

"Well then this might be bad timing but, do you think I could come over for a minute? You know, and apologize and what not?"

"Apologize? For?"

"Me being a total ass cricket."

Laughter on the other end. "I dunno. I mean, I'm not mad at you or anything-"

"No, but you were last night."

"Yeah. Alright, come on by. Those fools probably won't come back here."

I smiled slightly. "Are you hungry? I'll bring you some food."

"Man.... that would be amazing. I'll forgive you right here on the
phone if you do."

"Alright," I said laughing, "I'll see what I can do."

-

Matt's hazel eyes stared at me as we sat on the bench outside of his garage. He had finished the homemade breakfast I had brought him and was now ready to hear my apology.

"I know I shouldn't have gone out with that other guy but to me I thought it was a good idea."

"How?" He asked.

"I don't know. Because I wasn't sure really what Jimmy wanted.
You know, maybe it was just us being really super close over the last few weeks and he just was getting confused. I guess I didn't wanna get hurt first."

"So in turn you hurt him?"

"No! I didn't mean to hurt him! I had no idea he was in love with me!"

Matt grunted. "You're his best friend and you didn't know he was in love with you?"

"If he were in love with some other girl I would've seen it, but I tried NOT to see it with us. I'm too paranoid about messing up our friendship. He means too much to me and if we broke up-"

"Jimmy would still go out of his way to be your best friend. He wouldn't let you go just because something romantic didn't work out between you two. Would you let that ruin what you guys had? I know it sounds hard but shit, you two aren't normal."

I looked at him and raised an eyebrow. "Thanks, but if anyone is pointing the weird stick at someone it should be you."

"Oh really?" he smiled. "I take pride in being insane, but I mean you two are different. You're a... crazy type of weird."

"This isn't helping our friendship out any." I teased.

Matt let out a bunch of air that sounded like 'pshhhh' and shook his head. "How many people do you know would find a drug addict over dosed behind a store, and then become best friends with that person? No one. He was an addict, people stay AWAY from that kind of thing. You know? You didn't. You visited him every fuckin' day in that hole."

"In my defense, even if I had wanted to avoid him I wouldn't have been able to. He lived across the street from me."

"Don't you find that weird?" he asked standing up. "I mean, what are the fuckin' odds of that happening? One in a fuckin' billion. The fact that you stuck by him all this time is even more rare. Most normal people are afraid of people on drugs."

I stood and followed Matt in to his house so he could put his plate in the sink. "Yeah, well. I've been friends with people like that all of my life. I always go for the ones who have a shitty history. I guess they're not judgmental like the 'normal' people." I gave air
quotes as I said the word normal.

Matt chuckled then leaned against the sink. "So let me ask you something, and seriously. Where is it going with you and Jimmy?
Like, have you thought about it? Are you together or ..."

I shrugged. "I don't know. I told him that I would rather be with him over anyone else in the world and that I was happy with him. I want to be with him but I don't know if we've got a label just yet."

"I don't think there is a label in the world that could classify you two. You're both pretty fucked up."

I punched Matt's arm lightly and he grinned. "Thanks."

A car pulled in to the driveway and I looked out to see Dillon and Charlie hop out. They had beer and were arguing about something
as they headed over the stairs to the deck.

"I'm telling you, she wanted my fine body." Dillon was saying as they came through the door.

"She did not! She was eyeballin' me the whole time. She undressed me with her eyes. She wants some of Dr. Charlies'-"
Charlie stopped mid sentence when he saw me standing there.
"Well I'll be dipped in shit and covered in bread crumbs. Where the fuck you been hidin' out, killa?"

I shook my head. "Nowhere. Where've you been?"

"We went to the store to get some fuel for our day, and then go figure some girl gets all hot and bothered by my smooth talking and good looks, then this fucker has to go and but himself in the middle. Like some kinda of psychotic midget." Dillon said nodding
to Charlie.

"Please. In her mind we were already making the back of my car rock."

"Jesus." I mumbled in amusement.

"Speakin' of making things rock, how's Jimmy's neck? You haven't tried to suck the vocal chords out of him lately have you?" Dillon asked.

"Suck the vocal- Dear lord. How do I even put up with you guys?" I shook my head. "And things with us are fine. He got called in to work early though so we really didn't get to do much sober talking."

The guys exchanged glances then looked at me.

"What?" I asked.

"Nothing." Matt said quickly. "Anyway, now that these fuck heads are here, I think it'd be a good time to go beer cruising."

"Beer cruising?" I asked. "Isn't that illegal?"

"Old dirt road, no one's around. Who cares, besides, we're not the ones driving. You hate beer and that's all we brought. You can drive, so guess who's gonna tote us around?" Charlie said with a large grin on his face.

"Are you serious? What if I had things to do today?"

Dillon snorted. "Yeah right. You don't have shit to do, otherwise you wouldn't be sittin' here with us right now. You woulda bolted as soon as you saw us pull in."

"Maybe that's not a case of 'Not having anything to do' but more a case of 'I'm not very smart'." Matt said leaning over toward them.
I leaned forward and punched his arm, feeling all the hard feelings between us over the last few nights leave my body. I loved these boys, almost as much as Jimmy. I wouldn't want to hurt any of them.

"Actually, I take that punch back. I'd have to not have any brains in my head to hang out with you three."

"Ohhhhhh" They all three said at the same time.

"That's some bullshit right there, home girl." Dillon said.

"Ouch. Would you like me better if I made out with you?" Charlie asked and laughed as he dodged my fist.

"Come on. In all honesty, this whole thing... we hope that you two work it out, and you know. Grow old and all that sentimental bullshit that people say to their friends." Matt said.

"Well, thank you for that touching speech. Me too by the way. I hope everything does work out."

"Alright, now come on! Let's get the fuck out of here and enjoy some dirt road chuggin'." Charlie said before turning and heading out the door.