Pinky Promises

The morning of the Fourth I had gotten up early and made several different dishes for the family barbeque. Every year my Mother and Father had one, and for the last couple of years I had failed to attend due to a falling out I had had with my Dad. After hearing Jimmy express his concerns that he didn't feel as important to his family as he should have I decided that I would take advantage of having my folks so close. Jimmy had a good way of making me think differently about things.

I threw my cooler in the car, it was much lighter than the one I had struggled with previously before the pit party, and then brought out my food one plate at a time so I could get the packing part of my day done.

'Happy Fourth of July everyone, it's a hot one. Keep yourself cool by stopping in to Remmy's Bar and Grill tonight, they'll be offering some great deals after seven! For this evenings weather we have partly cloudy skies until about ten then some isolated
thundershowers in the area.'

I zoned the radio out and slammed my door shut keeping the cool air inside so that when I returned to get in I wouldn't be completely miserable when I left. It was bad enough that I was wearing pants and a T shirt instead of my normal hot humid summer clothes. I wanted to look presentable for not having seen my parents in awhile.

I crossed the street to Jimmy's and pounded on his door for a few minutes, but with no answer. I frowned, he was probably still sleeping. Not wanting to leave without saying goodbye I felt around for the spare key and then let myself in.

Immediately I was greeted by the cool air of the a/c and the smell of whatever he had made for dinner. It almost reminded me of lasagna but I knew he couldn't cook a home cooked meal to save his life.

I peeked my head in to the living room and it was empty so I followed my way down the short hallway that lead to his bedroom.
I knocked gently and heard nothing so I pushed the door open and stuck my head in.

"Jimmy?" I asked. There was no answer but I did see him sprawled out on his bed, a fan stuck almost directly in his face. He was shirtless with just a pair of basketball shorts on. "Jimmy." I whispered again.

Nothing.

Finally, after trying a few more times to wake him I simply jumped up on his bed and landed on top of him.

"Ooof!" He let out some air as he came to life and realized what was going on. He looked up at me with sleep in his eyes and smiled, leaning back in his pillow. "What the fuck are you doing here?" He asked.

"I came to say hey before I took off." I said.

"You goin' to your parents place?"

I nodded. "Yeah. What are you guys doing today?"

He sighed. "Nothing. Matt had to work last minute and the boner twins have dates."

"Whaaat? Noooo. If I'd of known I wouldn't have told my parents I'd come! I thought you guys had it all worked out."

"Shit happens." He shrugged and I felt his body move underneath me. It sent a weird chill up my body and I quickly removed myself by flopping over to the other side of his bed.

"Yeah but still. Now I feel bad Jimmy, you're gonna be all alone here today."

"I don't mind." He said pushing himself in to a sitting position.
"You'll be back later, right? We can hang out then."

"Yeah but I don't know when exactly." I said frowning at him.

"Heyyy. Don't look at me like that." He reached over and pinched my face with his fingers. "I'll be alright. I can be alone you know."

I remembered when there was a time where Jimmy couldn't be alone. Back when I first got to really know him he wasn't just in to fights. He was in to a lot of different drugs too. It made me sick to my stomach to think that he might one day relapse and go back to those ways, but he was doing good. How could you not have faith in someone you loved that much?

"I don't wanna leave you alone. I feel so bad."

"Don't. I'm good, babe."

I smiled at his pet name and sighed. "Alright well. I love you. I'll see you when I get home, okay?" I asked getting off the bed.

"Yeah, I'll be right here waiting."

"Okay." I headed out and by the time I got to the car I found myself turning around and heading back in to Jimmy's house.
"Jimmy?" I asked bursting through the door. He jumped a little then threw a pillow at me.

"You gotta stop doing that. You're gonna kill me."

"Come with me!"

"Huh?"

"Come with me to the cook out. Please? I really want you to."

"Ahhhh Lay, I'm good. I don't wanna impose."

"You wouldn't be imposing. I want you to come with me. Fuck having to sit here all day and not have anything to do. Besides, how can you turn down free food and fireworks later? Plus, my niece is gonna be there. She loves you! So do my parents. All of my family, they like you. So come on. Come with me."

"I would but-"

"Remember how you drug me to that party?" I asked.

He scowled. "Don't remind me."

"Well then make it up to me. Come with me. Sit and be bored by my side."

He grinned. "Are you sure?"

I nodded.

"They know what I was like you know, I doubt they'll let me around your niece."

The last time my folks had seen Jimmy he was bad. Skinny, barely ate, his eyes were sunken in. That was two years ago. They weren't people to hold grudges.

"They won't even say anything. Do you know how many of my family members were on drugs? Lots. And most still are. Fuck 'em. Come with me or I'm staying home."

"No, no. I don't want you to stay back just 'cuz of me. Then your parents would REALLY hate me. I'll go."

"Yay!" I let out a happy squeal and hugged him.

"Just give me like ten minutes to get ready okay?"

"You got it. I'll be out in the car."

-

Lucky for us the drive to my parent's camp wasn't that far from home. It only took us about twenty minutes to hit the dirt road and an additional six to actually make it to the camp. When we pulled up and parked next to my younger brother's vehicle I saw my niece running for my door.

"Aunnie!" she yelled as I picked her up.

"Hi baby! I've missed you!" I said.

"I mish you!" She said and squeezed me again. I was glad to see her since I really didn't get to anymore. Her birthday was coming up and she would be three, I couldn't believe how much she had grown.

"Uncle Jimmy is here do you wanna say hi to him?" I asked.

When Jimmy walked around the corner Sadie nearly flung herself from my arms to him. He grabbed on to her and lifted his up to his height.

"Hey there, you. Have you been a good girl?" He asked.

"Yeah." she said looking at him with a smile on her face. For some reason ever since she was born, Jimmy and Sadie had a connection. I remembered the first time she laid eyes on him.
Though she was only a few weeks old, having spent the first two weeks in the hospital due to a hole in her lung, she couldn't stop looking at him. She didn't want to sleep when he was around, and if she was going to get fed he had better be the one doing it. Otherwise she didn't eat for anyone else.

"Hey guys." My brother's voice cut in to Jimmy's chattering with the little girl. Jackson looked nothing like me. He was tall, and slender with black hair. The only thing we shared were the gray eyes.

"Hey man, how's it going?" I asked.

"Not bad. Working all the time now though."

"Makin' good money?" Jimmy asked though he was still looking at
Sadie.

"Good enough. I tell ya though, bub, throwin' lumber all day gets some sickening by Thursday night."

I laughed. "You were the muscle man of the family, I'm sure you'll be fine. Where's mom and dad?"

"At the store. I'm surprised you didn't pass 'em. They went to get some more watermelon or some damn thing. Staci's inside if you wanna come say hey though."

Staci was Jackson's girlfriend, but not the mother of his child.
Sadie's mother was a horrible bitch who had taken her away from
us when she was just seven months old. We weren't allowed to see her again until a few months after her first birthday.
Staci was a saint. I had hated all of my brother's girlfriends but she was the first that I genuinely liked. "Alright." I said and we made our way to the cabin we called 'Camp Molunkus'.

"I go in the boat." Sadie was telling us as walked through the door.

"You did?" I asked, and she nodded. "Did you have fun?"

"Yeah! I go again!"

Jackson laughed. "Easy shark bait. Grandpa will take you out on
the boat when he gets back."

She sighed dramatically but Jimmy tickled her to keep her happy.

"Hey Stace. How's it going?" I asked and joined her at the table.

"Hey, good."

"You guys been out here long?"

"Your brother drug me out here three days ago." She said, flashing a perfect smile. Staci was short with long blonde hair and blue eyes. She reminded me a little bit of Brooke Burns.

"Oh stop your complainin'. You like it out here, you said so yourself. Don't make me dump you in that lake."

"I'd like to see that, because I know for a fact she would beat your ass once she got out."

Jackson laughed and shook his head. "So Jimmy, how've you been man?"

Jimmy shrugged. "I've been good. Doing the same ol' same ol'."

I glanced at Jackson to see if the look of pity would cross his face like it did with everyone else that knew Jimmy's history. It didn't. Instead Jackson nodded and was satisfied.

Our parents showed up a few minutes later and greeted Jimmy with open arms, just like they used to do. Any worries he might have had before we got here were soon washed away as we started cooking our dinner, then sat down to eat.

-

"So I get there, and everyone's already drunk. I try to catch up of course, and next thing I know I'm looking at this patch of grass in their front yard thinking 'My what a nice place this is. No one has puked here, what a perfectly good waste of a place to barf!'... all the while puking my guts out." Jackson was saying. We had just finally gotten Sadie to go to sleep and tucked her in in the camper.

I was laughing while sipping on my one and only beer. I wouldn't be able to have anymore than that and drive home, even though I was sure we could have camped out for the night if I had really wanted to get drunk.

The truth was I was I didn't like drinking and I didn't do it often, but when I did it was a lot all at once and that usually killed my drinking itch for months. Usually it involved me having to sober up for those around me who were more intoxicated but it was okay. I would much rather have someone able to function instead of everyone being as helpless as an infant.

"You guys been to any good parties lately?" My father asked. I was surprised he had an interest.

"Not really. We don't go out much." I said.

"What? You not go out much? That must mean the party comes to you." Jackson teased.

"We went to a pit party the other night." Jimmy said. He was gladly taking whatever alcohol people were giving him, never having turned away a drink before.

"Yeah but it was no fun." I said quickly. I knew what was going to happen if Jimmy let it slip that some guy there was all over me. My brother would find whoever it was, no matter how long it took him, and he would kill him.

"The one out in Chester?" My father asked, again surprising me.

"Yeah, why?" I looked at him.

"I heard there was a big ol' fight out there. Cops were called, all that good stuff. They arrested a few people for DUI trying to get out of there."

"Were you like, there or something?" Jackson asked, clearly finding it just as strange as I was.

"Hell no, I haven't been to any kind of party since you guys were young. I work with a guy who's kid got his face pounded in and he was telling me about it." My dad said, looking over at Jimmy.

Jimmy raised an eyebrow. "Oh?"

"He said some tall skinny guy, with tattoos just showed up out of no where and busted his face."

"Dad, there are plenty of tall skinny tattooed guys around town." I said catching the look he was giving my best friend.

"Yeah well, I'm sure there are but how many of them hang out with my daughter?"

"You knew I was there?" I asked.

"Yeah, you're not that hard to identify you know. You are my kid, everyone around these parts know that."

There was an awkward silence as I steamed at my father's intense gaze.

"I just wanted to say thank you." He said finally looking at Jimmy.

"Huh? What for?" Jimmy asked.

"Because my buddy knows how his son treats women."

"Oh well, in that case you're welcome!" Jimmy said triumphantly.

"Now, what say we make a few more drinks and tell some more good party stories." Jackson said thrusting his bottle of beer in the air.

"Sounds good to me." I said.

I wasn't sure what time it was when I found myself out on the dock looking up at the stars, but everyone had already said their goodbyes and turned in for the night. Jimmy was using the out house and stumbled his way back down the path to the dock where he wobbled as he walked across the boards.

"Hey you." He said and clutched on to me as the water swayed us back and forth. His arms found their way around my waist, and he leaned his forehead on my back.

"Hi." I laughed. "You gonna make it?"

He chuckled. "Yeah I'll make it. When do I ever not?"

"I'm just checking. I don't want you to fall in the river because if I have to get in there at night time knowing what's in there to save
your ass, I'm not gonna be impressed mister."

He laughed against my skin and pulled me closer to him. Jimmy always got cuddly when he was drunk. Of course, he liked to be touchy feely and give hugs to everyone, but when it was just us he was insane with the snuggles. I couldn't say that I minded.

"Should we head out soon?" I sighed looking back up at the sky. It was so beautiful and peaceful there that I really didn't ever want to leave. This was my home as a child. I spent all my summers here.

"We can stay for as long as you want." He said slurring slightly. My father had given him some of his own private stock of Jack Daniels as a way of saying "Thank you for taking care of my daughter." I was surprised after the last conversation we had had. I hoped that tonight my efforts made up for being a lousy daughter.

"What are you thinkin' 'bout?" He asked.

"Nothing, just happy that you came with me." I said and turned so
I was facing him. He grinned at me after a second and looked away.

"What?" I asked.

"Nothing."

"Something."

"No."

"Yes."

"Noooo."

"Yeah."

He shook his head. "I hate arguing with a drunk person. They don't get it."

I laughed loudly then covered my mouth as though that would prevent me from waking my niece. "You're the one who's drunk not me."

"What? Oh." He grinned again and started to fall backwards but I grabbed on to his arms and pulled him to me. Our bodies collided together and we fell, barely remaining on the dock.

"I don't feel like swimmin'." I said as I got up and helped him to his feet.

"Me either. Why would you let me fall down like that?!"

Our laughter must have gotten too loud at some point because my father showed up with a slight smile on his face.

"I don't want you two fools to drown." he said as we walked back to my car with him.

"Don't worry, if anyone here is a fool, it's her." Jimmy said leaning against my car for support.

"Hey, don't be mean to the lady who's taking you home. I'll make you walk." I said and opened my door.

"He would have a welcome spot right inside." My dad said.

"Fine, keep him. He needs to be fed six times a day, and taken out to get some fresh air at least twice every few hours. He drinks like a fish and don't get me started on the grooming."

"Yeah, what's up with his hair anyway?"

Jimmy laughed at us then swung the door open drunkenly. He paused for a moment then made his way around the car and stuck out his hand at Dad.

"Good seein' you." He said.

"You too, feel free to stop by any time with Layla if you want. Our door is always open."

After Jimmy got in the car and comfortable I looked at my dad and smiled. "I had a good time today."

He nodded. "I did too. Sadie was pretty happy to see you."

"Yeah. I love that kid. I just wish I got to see her more often."

"I'm sure any time you want her all you have to do is ask. Jackson has her a lot actually."

"Why, where's the almighty perfect mother?" I asked sarcastically.

"Off doin' whatever, I guess. She sure is a real prize."

I snorted. "Yeah. Well, anyway, I love you Dad. I'll come back and visit more. I'll bring Jimmy too, since he got worn out. He's like a little kid, hopefully he'll sleep the entire way back to Lincoln."

"Want me to slip him a little more Jack?"

I laughed. "No, he's all set. Well...." I hesitated for a brief second before deciding to give him a hug. It was nice to be able to have a good time instead of thinking about how terrible I felt for our relationship failing.

"Love ya Dad." I said.

"Love ya too, Layla." He let go of me then sighed. "Hey, wait, before you go... I have something to tell you. I didn't want to say anything today because it was going so well, but...Your Uncle Everette isn't doing too well."

It took a second to register what he was saying but when it finally did I felt my heart sink. Uncle Everette was my favorite uncle in the world. In fact I used to spend more time at his house than my own in junior high just so I could be around him.

"The doctors are saying the tumor in his brain is pushing down now, and the treatments not working like it used to. He's lost control of his left side, although he can still feel it if it itches or something. Just doesn't have control over the muscles. He had a seizure a few days ago too, but he recovered. He's at a nice nursing home over by the ocean."

I swallowed the lump in my throat. "So..."

"So, if you want to see him... you'd better do it soon. He doesn't have a whole hell of a lot of time left."

The anger that I had washed away with the nice evening returned.
I felt betrayed that my father would wait so long to tell me he was sick. He had to have known about this!

But I didn't say anything. Instead I nodded and fought back the tears. "Alright, well I'll try to get over there tomorrow. I'll get the directions from Aunt Beth."

"Okay. Drive careful."

"I will."

I got in my car and when I shut my door Jimmy startled awake.

"Hey you." He mumbled.

"Hey." I kept my tone as though nothing was wrong. There was no point in telling Jimmy all of this when he was still having a good time.

"We headed home?" he asked and pushed himself up a little higher in the seat.

"Yeah we are. You need to stop anywhere before we do?"

He shook his head. "Nope, I'm good."

"And you know the rule."

"If I feel like I gotta puke then tell you and you'll throw me out the door."

I smiled. "I don't remember saying it quite like that, but good enough." I started the vehicle and drove around the small loop my dad and grandfather had made so cars could turn around easily instead of having to back up the entire way.

I couldn't believe my Uncle was so ill. Why didn't they just tell me?
Did they think I couldn't handle it? If that was the case then it was a shitty way to try to protect me. It had taken away valuable time I could have been spending with him.

"What's wrong?" Jimmy asked when we were a little over half way home. I hadn't said much.

"Nothing." I smiled and glanced at him.

"Don't lie to me." He said softly, his head was still laying on the
headrest but he was looking at me. "Even when I'm drunk I know when you're lying."

I squeezed the steering wheel a little bit tighter and prepared myself. I could say this without crying. I could tell him the story and not freak out and have to pull over.

"Layla...you okay?" He struggled to push himself up a little bit more and then rolled down the window. For a few more seconds I watched him fumble with a cigarette and lighter, but was relieved when he discovered he was too drunk to light it and admitted defeat.

"I'm alright." I said. Tears were welling up but I blinked them away and was thankful it was dark outside.

"Mmmm." He mumbled. He was quiet for a few minutes and I thought he had passed out then, "No you're not okay. Tell me what's wrong. Pleeeaaasseee."

I smiled a little and kept my attention on the road. If I focused on that I could just say the words without having to show the emotion.

"I thought you and your dad made up today." He said.

"We did...at least I thought...he just..."

"He made you mad again, right? Why? Is it what he said when he talked to you before you got in the car?"

"I thought you were sleeping."

"No, just watching a movie on the back of my eyelids."

"You're so strange, Jimmy."

"I know. So are you. That's why we're friends. Who else would be friends with me?"

"Matt...Dillon....Charlie...?"

"Those assholes knew me. A long time ago. You didn't. You just found me there on the ground..."

At his words I was forced to go back and relive the first day I had ever met Jimmy. Most people meet their best friend in school, or their job. Maybe someone else introduces them to you or you find them at a party. Not me. Not with him.

I was working at the convenient store at the edge of town, the one most truckers stopped at the get their shit because it was out of town and by the interstate so they didn't have to take their giant vehicles in to a small parking lot, when I found him. I was taking out the trash before my shift ended and there he was. Laying on
the ground behind the store.

I had to wake him up and make sure he was okay, which he really wasn't, and then called the ambulance. My co-worker was already there so he told me to go ahead to the hospital with him to make sure he was okay.

As it turned out, by some strange strange work of force, Jimmy lived directly across the street from me. I couldn't believe him when he told me but true enough when he had me bring him home from the hospital the address he gave me was the the little place near mine.

"Lay, come on."

"He waited until now to tell me that my uncle is dying and in a nursing home...and said that if I wanted to see him I had to do it right away because he wouldn't last much longer."

"Awweeee, nooooo. I'm sorry, babe." He reached his hand over and placed it on my knee.

"It's okay....well no, who am I kidding? It's not okay. It's fuckin' unfair. The fact that he waited until NOW to tell me? Urrrrrg. Just when I thought we were making progress then.."

"Maybe your dad couldn't really handle it himself so he was having a tough time telling you.."

"No, I doubt it. He didn't like his sister's husband very much."

"Well, that changes when a person gets sick. I know it sounds...ignorant or whatever but...he probably is feeling sorry he was an ass all that time instead of hanging out with him."

"I don't know. It just doesn't sound like him."

"Well then, maybe he's jealous."

"Huh?"

"Maybe he didn't want to tell you because he was just getting you back and now he knows your whole focus is gonna be on your uncle. Selfish? Yeah but.... I dunno. Parent's do weird shit when they feel like their kids don't love 'em."

I felt a twinge of pain go through me. He was right.

"I used to act like I didn't give a fuck about my parents....it broke their hearts but to me it made sense. I was addicted to drugs and alcohol and smokes...I was a disappointment. I didn't wanna do that to them, so I left. Now they don't even talk to me, and I WANT them to."

I looked over at Jimmy, his eyes were closed but his hand remained on my leg. His thumb moved up and down every once in awhile to comfort me.

"I love my parents I do, but what the fuck? I was tryin' to do the better thing for them and just... let 'em go. So they didn't have to say 'Oh yeah, you heard about that druggie dude who robbed the laundry mat? Yeah he is our son.'.. fuck that. If you can't make 'em proud then there's no point."

I let go of the steering wheel with my right hand and placed it on top of Jimmy's hand, then laced our fingers together. He opened his eyes and looked at me.

"Sorry, this was your rant not mine."

I laughed. "No it's okay... I don't mind listening when you talk. Or sing." I added as a thought from earlier when he and my brother and mother started to sing Queen.

"Thanks.... you know something, Lay?"

"What?"

"You're amazing."

"Huh? No I'm not."

"Yeah you are. You were gonna just stay behind if you thought I didn't have anything to do. You were seriously gonna just say fuck everyone else and be with me. That's awesome. That's the best kind of best friend a guy could ask for."

"Awe. Well, you're the best kind of best friend a girl could ask for."

"I mean it. You're awesome. I love you. You know what we should do?"

"What should we do? Please don't say party more, I'm probably gonna fall asleep as soon as I get in the door."

"No no, not that. We should... I should ask you..." The booze was taking over now fully, and I laughed. Jimmy was close to passing out.

"We should what Jimmy?"

"You should marry me."

I snorted but at the same time felt butterflies. It wasn't the first time he had said that. He usually said it joking around, or when he was really drunk, and once while he was in the hospital which was the start of it all.

"You wouldn't want me to marry you Jimmy, I'd be a terrible wife."

"No you wouldn't. You took care of me. You always do. You make sure I don't drown in a river, and that I get to my house when I can't walk...I remember one time you even went to the store at three in the morning to get me a milkshake because I wanted one soooo bad but couldn't drive because I was too fucked up."

"You remember that?" I asked. He had been so out of it, and I didn't want to leave him alone but Charlie insisted he would be okay and he would keep an eye on him. I came back and brought him the milkshake and even though he was so happy to get it I was sure he would forget about the whole thing.

"Of course I do. See? As fucked up as I get, I always remember you." He rubbed let go of my hand and rubbed my leg then folded his hands in his lap. The position of "Sleeping Jim" that he took when he was passing out.

"Good, I'm glad. Because I'd never forget you."

"You better fuckin' not." Were his last words before his snoring filled my car.