Not Now

“T-The b-bird.. I can’t do this!“ I threw the book “Winnie The Poo“ on the floor, my tutor (so far) Mark Hoppus let out a frustrated sigh before picking it up and handing it back to me, I looked at it as if were the devil. “I can’t read, I’m a hopeless case. You already are frustrated with me and it’s only been two days.“ It’s the truth too, Mark’s my fifth tutor in two months, the others gave up after I went into fits of rages because I couldn’t read the word ‘Now‘ And the book itself looked like a fourth grade level. That’s right I, Tom DeLonge a 16 year old can’t read at all; nada zip. Not even those books you give your toddler to read. You can blame my mother’s horrible parenting skills; she left me to die when I was a baby. I was discovered crying my diaper so soiled the social worker had to step out to recover. My Dad was out of the picture way before I was born. So pretty much I grew up in a foster home that didn’t know I couldn’t read until I ended up failing everything. Fucking geniuses.

“Tom.“ Mark sighed, looking me straight in the eye.

“No! I’m dumb as fuck, I can’t do shit.. give up on me!“ I shouted, I’m sure I woke up the other foster kids.

“You need to try instead of getting angry, I know you can do it.“ Mark seemed so sure, I kinda like this guy. He’s kinda hot too, his eyes are pretty.. Wait what the fuck? What am I saying? He’s five years older than me for Christ sake!

I shook my head, “It’s a lost cause, look I don’t need to read, where I’m going in life is probably stealing shit and living like a bum.“ I picked at the hole on my ridiculous pants that I had to wear, I hated jeans they were so closed in, I like roomy stuff, I feel like my balls are about to fall off with these on.

“Tom, don’t say that. I swear to you I won’t give up on you like those other tutors did. I’m here for a reason, so you can be somebody which I’m positive that someday you will become something important in today's society.“ He said, as if he were boasting about his kid getting straight A’s. I didn’t want to admit it but when he said ‘I won’t give up on you‘ It made my heart skip a beat.

“If I can’t read how can I start on the elementary and then high school stuff? I’m 16 how is that going to work so I’m not in school till I’m 50?“ I didn’t want to tear up in front of Mark but I couldn’t see myself succeeding at anything, I felt like a waste, non important, invisible to everyone. I held them in though that could be saved for later where I could sneak in some alcohol or go off to the local park.

“Working hard is the key, Tom. You have to work to get what you want and it may be frustrating at times but you bear it and continue on. I swear it’ll be worth it.“ Mark smiled gently at me, I couldn’t help but smile back, his were contagious.

“I’ll try.“ I shrugged, for you I thought.

“That’s what I like to hear, kid. Well I have to go its already 2:00. So, I’ll see you tomorrow at 7:30. Be ready for some challenges, alright?“ Mark gently patted me on the shoulder, grinning when I nodded my head, I felt like putty when he touched me. This is so wrong..

What is more wrong is that when Mark started walking out of my room I started to stare at his perfect ass, the way it moved in the creases of his baggy beige pants.

“Ugh.“ I groaned when I felt my pants tightening, I fell back on my bed and tried to think of anything but Mark. But it was no use, it was starting to get painful too. I bit my lip and looked towards the door, it was closed but I never knew when a kid or the care taker would come in to bother me.

Oh, fuck it.

I unbuttoned my pants and stuck my hand inside my boxers, I grabbed hold of my length, moaning at the contact on my sensitive skin, I started to slowly move up and down, gradually moving faster until I screamed Mark’s name and cummed all over my hand. I took my hand out and wiped it on my sheets. Did I just really masturbate to the picture of my tutor’s ass?

I didn’t have time to contemplate it since I felt my eyes grow heavy and I fell asleep. I woke up a few hours later in semi darkness, I could hear the dinner bell being rung. Fucking lazy asses. I rolled out of bed since I was pretty hungry and started descending downstairs where most of the kids were already seated at the dinner table.

They were six of us, aging from 7-16.. I’m the oldest so I got my own room, suckers! I sat down next to Erin who is 14 years old and sitting across from me is the second oldest and current douche bag. Tyler looks from his lap and smirks at me, “Can you read this for me, Tom?“ He asks, holding a rather complex book which looks entirely like Chinese, he starts to laugh and the whole table erupts. I glare pacifically and lean over, I snatch the book from his hands and rip all the papers out and throw it at his face.

“That was my English book you fucker!“ He screamed, “MOM TOM RIPPED MY BOOK BECAUSE HE“S JEALOUS THAT HE CAN’T READ FOR SHIT.“ Oh would I like to fuck his shit up! And why do these kids keep on calling her mom? That’s fucking creepy!

“Tom, go back to your room, you get no dinner and that goes out of your allowance!“ The woman with fiery red hair (Our Foster Mother) comes in with a pissed off look on her face like someone took all her midol. Well fuck, glad I don’t have that.

“But he was making fun of me, that isn’t fair. And he cursed, he isn’t allowed to curse!“ I screamed back, sometimes a part of my brain causes me to act like a 6 year old, other times I can be completely normal and civilized.

“You started this, Tom. I’m afraid you’re going to have to pay the consequences now go before it’s more than a weeks allowance.“ She sat down, gesturing to leave the dinner table.

I look over to see Tyler with a smug expression, “You hate me, all of you do. Well I HATE YOU TOO.“ I pulled back from the chair and stomped all the way upstairs and made sure to slam my door extra hard.

I fall face down onto my bed, angry tears falling down my face, “I hate this house, I hate these stupid rules.“ I mumbled into my pillow, trying to keep cool so I don’t end up destroying my room.

Eventually I calmed down and I sat up, my stomach made sure to growl. I groaned, I can’t just go a night without eating. I stood up and walked towards my window. I could run down to the gas station, I still had some money.

I decided the hell with it and opened the window, I carefully pulled myself out so I could grab onto one of the branches. Slowly, I climbed off and jumped down. I looked back at the home for pretty much my whole life, I wish I could run away from this place but I know they’d eventually find me and I really look forward to seeing Mark everyday.

Ugh.. I trudged on towards the road, several blocks later I was at a gas station that stayed open at all hours of the night. I pulled open the door and was about to go get a bag of chips and red-bull when I spotted… Mark? At the cash register.

He didn’t see me so I darted towards the junk isle and grabbed a bag of funneyons and cheetos, then towards the fridge to get a can of red-bull. I knew Mark would act like an adult and call my care taker cause I was out when I shouldn’t be, I wanted to leave before he noticed me but I’m hungry so I held my pride and set my shit on the counter where Mark is leaning his face on his hand boringly looking at a magazine.

“Is that all?“ He asked with a dull tone, I stifled a laugh and said, “Yes.“ He recognized my voice cause he snapped his head up right. „“Tom? What are you doing here?“

“What are you doing here?“ I asked back, I know that’s rude and I squeezed my eyes shut at that, “Sorry.“ I mumbled, bringing a hand to tug at my hair.

“Tutors don’t get paid a lot, Tom.“ Mark said knowingly, “No, I’m serious, kid. Where’s your mom?“

I don’t know why but I got angry at that, “She’s not my mom.“ I gritted my teeth, “If you want to hassle me instead of ringing my shit up then I’m leaving.“ And then I turned around and left. Halfway down the road I started to realize what a dick I was being, I cursed under my breath.

Tomorrow was gonna be awkward.