Gravity

I watched as a grin swept across his face, his dimples intensifying as he leaned back into the deck chair with his brawny arms going to the back of his head. He lifted one leg over the other and barked a laugh and Brian went over; hit him on the back with his own barking laugh as he walked off into the house. Brian’s hair was wet, but I still couldn’t shake the odd resemblance he had to Johnny Depp with his new hair cut—I really did miss his only spiky hair. Brian’s body went through the sliding doors and my eyes found Matt’s face again. He was talking about some silly thing that happened when they played a show down in Texas. I wasn’t really hearing anything, honestly, I was too busy trying to grasp the fact that he was here, and he hasn’t said a word to me.

And this kids fucking hair—pretty soon it could be longer than mine.

“Uncle Shads!” I turned my gaze to where Sarah and Johnny were and put my leg over my own, my hand going up to my mouth where I bit at the nails that weren’t going to be there if I kept doing this. My leg bounced up and down as I saw Matt get up from his chair and followed Zacky. He muttered something about needing help with Jimmy just as my sister walked out of the house carrying four bottles of Smirnoff Ice—she didn’t want something strong since she had the baby now.

“If you continue to stare a whole in his head, he isn’t going to have anything left to stare at.” My eyes came to meet Chris’s, who was looking at me with a frown. I groaned and sat back into the chair. “What’s eating at you, Evelyn? What’s in that head of yours?” He offered a beer and I took it. “Make some room?” I was sitting on a beach chair, the ones where you can lie back on. So I smiled, pushed forward so that he could sit behind me. His legs hung off the sides of the chair as he sat back. I scooted so that I was between his legs, my back against his chest. My racing heart calmed down as I took a sip from the brown bottle in my hand.

“I’m just surprised.” I admitted, my eyes sweeping the porch. Chris wrapped his arms around me, moved my hair from my neck and kissed the area between my neck and shoulder. I sighed in content and closed my eyes.

“Why?” He breathed, resting his chin on my shoulder lightly so that it didn’t hurt. “You told him to stay away, didn’t you?” I set the bottle between my thighs—it was cold but I ignored it and took one of his hands into my own and started to play with his fingers.

“Yeah,” I said with a sigh. “But I didn’t expect him to listen to it, Chris.”

“Did you expect yourself to carry it out?” He said and turned my head as he took his chin off me.

“Of course!” I whispered. Just then I heard a little voice and looked over toward the sliding doors. Her hair was a mess and her clothes were askew as she scanned around the porch, her eyes big and red and she wiped at them as more tears fell from her face. Without a second thought, I gave Chris my bottle and walked towards her.

“Evie!” She cried as her eyes spotted me. Her little legs pumped her body towards me and I grabbed her and picked her up. When I had her, her small arms wrapped around me and she cried into my neck. I felt someone’s hand on my shoulder and looked up to see Chris looking down at Sadie with worry.

I rubbed my hands in soothing motions on her back as I asked her what was wrong. “What’s wrong, sweetie?” I said, my eyes catching a body in the corner of my eye—I think it was Matt, but I was too zoned in on Sadie to care.

Matt

I watched in fascination as I watched him fall asleep in my arms. He was so small but after a while of holding him, he sure as hell felt heavy. I stopped singing to him and looked up at the door opening—Mel came in with a grin and she set a bottle of beer next to me. I smiled at her as she motioned for me to hand her Jimmy Junior. I stood from the rocking chair and slipped her the sleeping baby. “You’re so good with him, Matt.” She murmured as she gazed down at her son.

It was, without a doubt, how madly in love she was with the little creature in her arms. Her brown gaze stayed locked on him as I answered. “He’s just easy to handle.” I said with a chuckle. Her eyes left his and she looked at me with curiosity.

“No,” She murmured, “You’re great with kids, Matt.” She winked at me before turning around to put him in his crib. I watched as she ran her fingers over his little belly and I wondered how he could drink so much from the bottle and have somewhere to store it in there. Her brown eyes found mine after she pulled away. “Did you change him?” She turned towards me and pulled her long brown hair into a bun. I felt a little nausea suddenly as déjà vu swept over me—Mel may have been a few years younger than her older sister, but the resemblance was so uncanny I caught myself thinking I was talking to Evie again.

But it always turned to only fooling me.

“Yeah,” I murmured, suddenly wishing I had JJ in my hands, the nickname that I have thought of when I first met him because Vengeance had called him a James Junior. “Right before I sang him to sleep.” She smiled as she walked towards me. When she reached me, she put her hand on my shoulder and gave it a good squeeze.

“You’re going to make a good father someday, Uncle Shads.” She said. I felt a tug at my heart, but I hid it with a smile as I scratched the back of my head. My hair really was getting long, but I didn’t feel like cutting it—I kind of liked it.

“Thanks, Mel.” She shook her head, leaned up and kissed my check before turning on her heels to head back to the door. I grabbed my beer off the changing table and went to head out, but Mel stopped at the door.

“Matt?” She said, her eyes searching my own. I gave her a nod of acknowledgement since I was already downing my beer bottle. “Don’t give up yet, okay?”

I was mid-lift when she said this. “On what, Melanie?”

She smiled sadly. “On my sister,”

“Oh,” I said. “I think it’s the other way around, Mel.” She rolled her eyes.

“My sister is thick-skulled, and when she thinks she makes a fool of herself, Matt, she tends to try and get rid of it.”

“I’ve been friends with her for a while, Mel, but I can’t grasp what you mean.” I said honestly. She sighed.

“I mean, when she told you that she was in love with you…you really hurt her.” I felt a little stung that she was repeating my mistakes to me, and I wanted to tell her to stop talking about this topic in general, but if I were to have any chance to win my best friend back, Mel would be the one to tell me. “And right now, the only way to heal from that is to move passed it.”

I said what I was thinking. “Is there a chance?”

Mel smiled and winked at me. “Don’t give up, Matt, that is all I am saying.”

With that said, I watched as her figure left me standing there confused as ever; women and their weird ways of answering your questions. I turned towards JJ, who was sound asleep. I watched him for a few seconds before bending into the crib and placing my lips to my nephew’s head. When I pulled away, I smiled sadly. “When you have a best friend someday, kid, treat her well and don’t let her forget how much she mens to you, you got that?” I shook my head, as if I thought he could answer me. All I managed to see was a flicker of his fingers before I turned to walk out of the bedroom.

I knew that I had fucked up with Evie the day I walked out of her father’s house. When she was missing, the only thought that ran through my head was the memory of those words leaving her precious pink lips. The day she came to my room to tell me she was done with me, I lost myself. I wasn’t able to find myself until JJ was born, and even now I still feel a little lost.

Every time I stole a look at her, the only image I could manifest was when she was standing before me, her big brown eyes filling with hot tears and falling. It was burned into the back of my eyelids and it broke my heart every time I saw the image.

I stayed in the house for a few more moments, watched some people walk by me. Mel gave me another wink as she walked out with three Smirnoff bottles and onto the porch, where our friends were. Through the window, my eyes sought out Evie. She was perched between his laps and I felt a sting of pain rush through my chest at the image—maybe a little jealousy.

He bent and kissed her—okay, a lot of jealousy.

I forced my eyes from the two and groaned as I ran my hand down my face. Get yourself together, you fuck face, I thought just as my phone chirped. I dug it out of my pocket and looked at the screen to see it was a picture text from Brandi. It was the same as it has always been—a naked picture of her asking me if I had missed her yet. I ignore it and decided to go back out where the rest of the gang was.

I was looking at my feet as I made my way towards the sliding doors. I heard another chirp from my pocket but ignored it as I opened the doors.

I froze at the image I saw—it was stupid, but I did. Evie had the little girl in her arms and she was asking her a question, but the little girl only wrapped her small arms around Evie’s neck and cried harder. But that isn’t what really made me stop—it was Chris, who was standing behind the two with his arm on Evie’s waist, his blue eyes casted in worry as he gazed down at both of the girls.

The green monster made its way through my system—they were a perfect family in that moment, and I knew that this is what I have found myself wanting for a few weeks now. Not with just any woman, but with her.

With my best friend.

Immediately I pulled my phone out of my pocket and hit reply: Meet me in fifteen.

Brandi answered quickly, asking where and I said my house.