A Fool's Dance

Tyler seemed even more distant now. We didn't argue as much as we used to but that would require actually speaking to each other.

I laid on the couch, like I had been for the last week, wallowing in my own misery. I've left the house about two times to go to games and I've gotten up from the couch only to go to the bathroom.

If it wasn't for Freddy I would end up in an alcoholic coma. Tyler could care less about how I spent my days or if I had eaten anything.

"What is wrong with me?" I groaned as Marshall covered his eyes with his paw. "Thanks Marshall."
He padded over to me, licking my hand that was hanging off the side of the couch. He jumped up into the vacated spot next to me.

"Morning babe," Tyler said, walking past me but not kissing me like he used too. "To much to drink last night?"

I nodded, my head was pounding as I noticed the empty wine bottle on the ground.

"Did you drink alone again?" Tyler asked, taking sips of his coffee.

I nodded. I can't believe he still hasn't asked why I was even drinking. Either he didn't realize it or he didn't care. "What time is it?"

"Seven," he placed his cup in the sink. "I'm leaving in like 10 minutes."

"Freddy still sleeping?"

Tyler's face fell a little but he nodded making his way across the room to the empty spot next to me. He began flipping through channels, waiting for Brad to call.

I shuck glances at him, while he pet Marshall. It felt like we were just friends, buddies, roommates. Not like boyfriend or girlfriend, had this been 6 months ago we would have been cuddling or at least holding hands or something.

"Well I better get going," he said leaning closer to me, "I'll see you in a couple of days."

Our lips met, "Good luck." He kissed me one more time, before grabbing his suitcase and leaving.

I fell back on the couch, everything playing like a movie in mind.

Tyler intertwined our fingers together as he looked out the window at the long stretch of road ahead of us. We were three hours into our six hour drive to Toronto.

"Do you love me?" he asked, not taking his eyes off the road.

My eyebrow rose at his question, "Of course I love you."

"No matter what?"

"No matter what," I placed a kiss on his cheek. "Where is this coming from?"

Tyler looked at me now, a small smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. "I just want to make sure."

I rolled my eyes, a smile spread across my face as he kissed the top of my hand. "Afraid I'm only with you for the money or because you play hockey?

He shook his head, but then nodded. I always knew Tyler had a soft spot but I never thought he would be afraid that I was with him only for the money and fame.

"I would love you even if you got drafted to the Oilers or the Panthers. I would love you even if you didn't win the Stanley Cup. I would love you if I lived in Brampton and you lived in Boston. No matter what, I would love you."

The smile on his face grew even bigger as I placed my other hand on top of his and squeezed. Silence fell over us and our eyes focused back on the road in front but Tyler's hand never left mine.

Now it seemed like Tyler did love me the same way I loved him, that all we had been through meant nothing to him. That I meant nothing to him.

At least not as much as he meant to me.



I watched Freddy struggle with cooking, laughing at him as he knocked over boxes and pans.

I giggled as I downed the rest of my beer. Freddy was definitely a better singer than he was cook.

I wrapped my arms around his waist as I buried my face in his back, "Thank you."

He tensed up a little bit but then turned around to properly hug me, "No problem."

Freddy was cute in every way possible, the same kind of cute Tyler used to be but that's because Freddy hasn't changed at all. I've had both of them wrapped around my finger for years only Tyler was beginning to unravel.

I set the plates and wine glasses on the coffee table where we would be eating and watching the game.

Freddy's eyes were on me as I plopped down in front of the TV in Tyler's sweatpants and shirsey.

"Focus on cooking before you burn the place down," I stuck my tongue out at him.

Tyler dropped the strainer, spilling all of the freshly cooked pasta on the ground.

"Good job Segs," I teased.

"Shut up," he laughed, throwing the kitchen floor pasta at me.

"Oh it's on," I grabbed some of the pasta and began to throw it at him. He tossed more at me as the food fight began. I fell back on the floor laughing with pasta in my hair and all over the kitchen now.

"How did it get on the ceiling?" Tyler asked, sounding geniuinely surprised while laughing that stupid, cute laugh of his.

All I could do was giggle as Tyler began picking up the pasta for real and putting it in the trash.

"Come here," he motioned to me on his knees. His hand was moving towards my face as his face got closer to mine in what I thought might have been a kiss, was actually just him picking a piece of pasta out of my hair. "Got it."

I rolled my eyes, a goofy smile on my face. This time I pulled Tyler's face towards me and kissed him on the nose, "Good try babe."

"Thanks," he kissed me on the lips, sending the butterflies fluttering. I couldn't believe he still gave me these feelings. He pulled me closer to him, kissing me more passionately now.

"What are you two doing?" Tyler's mom asked standing above us, with Cassidy and Candace behind her.

We both blushed, pulling away from each other so quickly it only made us look more suspicious. Cassidy and Candace both gave us a look but smiled at how embarrassed we were.

"Tyler was trying to cook and it failed," I chimed in.

Candace rolled her eyes, "Ty never could cook."

Now it was Tyler's turn to roll his eyes.

"Why were you two on the ground?" Jackie, his mom, asked picking up a piece of pasta from the
counter.

"Food fight," Tyler blushed again.

It was cute how embarrassed he still got around his mom and siblings. It showed how he was still grounded and that was one of the many things I loved about him.

"And why were your cheeks red?" Candace asked, a sly smile on her face.

"Cause we caught them kissing," Jackie said both Cassidy and Candace giggling at us.

"We're going to go get pizza," he grabbed my hand, his cheeks still flushed as he practically dragged me out of the house.

"You're so cute when you're embar-" his lips crashing onto mine prevented me from finishing that sentence.

"And so are you," he smiled.

I watched Freddy spoon a scoop of pasta next to the chicken on the plates and bring them over to us. I poured the glasses of wine as we clinked cups.

"Let's turn this game into a drinking game,"I suggested, "Every time the Bruins score we take a shot, two if Tyler scores."

"You've turned into quite the alcoholic but alright you're on," we shook on it as I grabbed the shot glasses and whiskey.

I was on my second glass of wine as the Bruins scored. We highfived, clinked glasses and downed our shots. We took half a shot since Tyler got an assist.

Half way through the second period I was already buzzed. Just as I was about to say something, the Bruins scored and we both jumped up. We took our shots as I silently prayed Tyler would score.

"Freddy," it was intermission now and I was boredline drunk. "Do you think I'm not good enough for Tyler?"

He looked at me, a confused expression on his face, "I think you've have enough." He reached for the glass in my hand but I pulled back.

"Seriously, am I not good enough but he doesn't want to break up with me?" I finished off my glass and reached for the bottle.

Freddy sighed, "You drink a lot now. What's that about?" He avoided the question again which means either it was true or it was partially true.

I shrugged, "I don't know."

"Don't give me that shit Avery, you know why you drink. You don't just become an alcoholic just because."

His words hurt a little but I know it was because he was worried about me. "Why can't I? Tyler did." He nodded, taking the bottle from me and taking a long drink. "I don't like my self right now." I sighed, finally admitting it to someone. "It's easier to drown myself in alcohol than it is tears. It hurts less."
Freddy nodded. "You are to good for Tyler. You deserve better and I'm not the first person to tell you that."

"No I deserve Tyler. I deserve whatever this is," I slurred my words a little, "We haven't had sex in months, and I haven't even really tried. I just let our relationship fall apart. I ask to many questions and expect him to always be there for me. He loves me and that should be enough."

Freddy looked at me, he just stared at me almost blankly as I bit back my lip. "I can't," he paused, "You know that is all lies. If he loved you he wouldn't put you through that or make you think that. He wouldn't let you drink your feelings away or let you sleep on the couch."

Silence fell over us as I took in everything that Freddy said. He a point and it was breaking my heart but there was one thing still on my mind. "Do you think he is cheating, like when he goes out he isn't just with the guys. I know how girls are and I know Tyler. "

"What? Avery no, what that's crazy. Tyler wouldn't do that."

"Godamnit don't lie to me Freddy, just don't. I've been through enough already. He is cheating on me isn't he?" I asked, holding back the sobs. "Isn't he?!" I practically yelled when he didn't answer.

A single tear slid down my cheek as the Bruins scored, this time it was Tyler. We both looked at the bottle on the table then looked at each other. We did our double shots, Freddy moving in closer to me. "Why didn't you tell me?" I asked as I wiped the tear from my cheek.

I took drinks from the bottle now as Freddy just looked at me. I couldn't help but stare back. Freddy was cute and cared about me, more than Tyler did right now but I couldn't. No. This is wrong on so many levels.

"I will stand by you, I will help you through, when you've done all you can do," he whisper sang into my ear as he wrapped his arm around me, "And you can't cope, I will dry your eyes,I will fight your fight, I will hold you tight.."

I looked up at him, my eyes filled with tears and his filled with concern, I watched as his face move closer to mine, "Freddy," I breathed, a wave of panic washing over me.

But it didn't stop him as his lips met mine in a soft kiss.

His hands tangled in my hair as he deepened the kiss. Tyler's unamused face flashed on the screen as he was sent to the penalty box for slashing.

I was going to regret this big time.