These Secrets Are Killing Me
I Stuck Up For You, Do the Same for Me.
I watched as they tore apart my room, the mutters of how could she, were did we go wrong tore my heart apart. I prayed that they wouldn't send me to rehab I didn't go I wasn't even addicted to anything. "Jesse there's enough drugs to fucking kill you is that what you were planning on doing?" Uncle Ray asked. Oh God my heart break and all I could do was mutter a no, I used the wall as my support system for now.
I looked over at Mom through my tears and saw her really crying this time, was it because the guilt was eating at her probably not. I just shook my head and cried as I slid down the wall causing myself even more pain. I looked at them tearing my room apart throwing the drugs into the pile and carefully placing bottle after bottle of alcohol into the pile as well. I prayed and prayed hard they wouldn't look under neath my bed, or if they did they would ignore the box. That would probably the be the icing on the cake.
"Damn it Jesse! Were the fuck did I go wrong?" Dad asked, the tears falling down his face. I shrugged my shoulders and muttered an you didn't. He just shook his head and continued to raid my closet, throwing at boxes of liquor. How much shit did she plant in my room? I would find out eventually, it was a pretty silent raid expect the occasional sniffle and the mumbled damn it.
"JESSE WHY!" Mom screamed at me, throwing some bags of coke at me. I just looked her dumbfounded. She was asking me why? I wasn't the one doing this shit she was. I wanted to scream it out so loudly to the whole damn house. No one was holding a gun to my head telling me if I didn't tell them it was Mom I would die, so I wasn't going to tell them. I just shook my head and sobbed.
I raised my knees to my chest and placed my arms around them and cried for what seemed like hours. I wanted to go comfort Dad and tell him that it was going to be okay but Uncle Mikey had that job. I wanted to scream at my Mother for doing this to me, raise up my sleeve and show her what she makes me do, but I couldn't. God if I could I would maybe Mom was right maybe I do need to grow balls and toughen up.
"J-Jesse I thought long and hard. Baby I'm going to send you to rehab to get the help you need." Dad said, placing one hand on my knee. I looked up from my knees to meet my Dad's blood shot eyes, to his right was Mom the same thing her blood shot eye's staring at me.
"Mommy please don't send me." I cried, in my head I was screaming.
"I'm sorry but you need help."
'You fucking planted all that shit in my room, I've stuck up for you please do the same for me. Please.' I screamed in my head, what I was really doing was crying my heart out and holding onto my father.
I looked over at Mom through my tears and saw her really crying this time, was it because the guilt was eating at her probably not. I just shook my head and cried as I slid down the wall causing myself even more pain. I looked at them tearing my room apart throwing the drugs into the pile and carefully placing bottle after bottle of alcohol into the pile as well. I prayed and prayed hard they wouldn't look under neath my bed, or if they did they would ignore the box. That would probably the be the icing on the cake.
"Damn it Jesse! Were the fuck did I go wrong?" Dad asked, the tears falling down his face. I shrugged my shoulders and muttered an you didn't. He just shook his head and continued to raid my closet, throwing at boxes of liquor. How much shit did she plant in my room? I would find out eventually, it was a pretty silent raid expect the occasional sniffle and the mumbled damn it.
"JESSE WHY!" Mom screamed at me, throwing some bags of coke at me. I just looked her dumbfounded. She was asking me why? I wasn't the one doing this shit she was. I wanted to scream it out so loudly to the whole damn house. No one was holding a gun to my head telling me if I didn't tell them it was Mom I would die, so I wasn't going to tell them. I just shook my head and sobbed.
I raised my knees to my chest and placed my arms around them and cried for what seemed like hours. I wanted to go comfort Dad and tell him that it was going to be okay but Uncle Mikey had that job. I wanted to scream at my Mother for doing this to me, raise up my sleeve and show her what she makes me do, but I couldn't. God if I could I would maybe Mom was right maybe I do need to grow balls and toughen up.
"J-Jesse I thought long and hard. Baby I'm going to send you to rehab to get the help you need." Dad said, placing one hand on my knee. I looked up from my knees to meet my Dad's blood shot eyes, to his right was Mom the same thing her blood shot eye's staring at me.
"Mommy please don't send me." I cried, in my head I was screaming.
"I'm sorry but you need help."
'You fucking planted all that shit in my room, I've stuck up for you please do the same for me. Please.' I screamed in my head, what I was really doing was crying my heart out and holding onto my father.
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