Distance Disturbs Me
Alan
Austin,
Maybe a month and a half ago I would have cared about what you have to say. Now, I’m too tired and angry and hurt to care about anything, honestly. Your sappy shit isn't phasing me. Do you really think that sending me that stupid letter is going to fix everything that’s happened to me since you've left? Because it's not. When you left, I didn't know how to deal with it, so guess what? I’m back to the Alan I became when my dad left, the angry, rude, asshole Alan, and I don't even care.
This time, it’s because of you. Because you, my best and only friend, fucking left me without anything more than a goodbye hours before boarding that plane and leaving me all alone. How could you do that? You know damn well how I reacted when my dad left, how could you go and do the same thing years later?
A small part of me wants to forgive you, to let you back in and be your best friend again, but I know that can’t happen. What if I become friends with you again and everything is back to normal, and then suddenly you leave for the second time? I couldn’t handle that.
So this letter is basically me saying that our friendship is over. You don’t need me, I don’t need you. We’re done here. It would be best if you just stopped sending me letters, as well. It’ll be better that way, we can both move on quicker and less painfully, don’t you think?
-Alan
P.S. You know the worst part, Austin? I fell in love with you, too. In ninth grade. Guess we've both made mistakes, huh?
P.P.S. Tell your grandmother I hope she feels better soon.
Maybe a month and a half ago I would have cared about what you have to say. Now, I’m too tired and angry and hurt to care about anything, honestly. Your sappy shit isn't phasing me. Do you really think that sending me that stupid letter is going to fix everything that’s happened to me since you've left? Because it's not. When you left, I didn't know how to deal with it, so guess what? I’m back to the Alan I became when my dad left, the angry, rude, asshole Alan, and I don't even care.
This time, it’s because of you. Because you, my best and only friend, fucking left me without anything more than a goodbye hours before boarding that plane and leaving me all alone. How could you do that? You know damn well how I reacted when my dad left, how could you go and do the same thing years later?
A small part of me wants to forgive you, to let you back in and be your best friend again, but I know that can’t happen. What if I become friends with you again and everything is back to normal, and then suddenly you leave for the second time? I couldn’t handle that.
So this letter is basically me saying that our friendship is over. You don’t need me, I don’t need you. We’re done here. It would be best if you just stopped sending me letters, as well. It’ll be better that way, we can both move on quicker and less painfully, don’t you think?
-Alan
P.S. You know the worst part, Austin? I fell in love with you, too. In ninth grade. Guess we've both made mistakes, huh?
P.P.S. Tell your grandmother I hope she feels better soon.
♠ ♠ ♠
Here's my first chapter. I'm sorry in advance; Alan's going to be quite the asshole for a while. Whoops. Also, Alan's chapters are probably going to be fairly short since he's trying to push Austin away and doesn't want to open up too much to him. Hope you like it so far!