Generation Why Bother

We didn’t say a single word to each other until we got to the block nearest to the band’s apartment. We didn’t even debate on which direction to take; I just took a right when we got out of the building and Chuck followed, staying close in fear of getting lost. He didn’t seem nearly as rude as Riley, and for that, I was thankful I wasn’t stuck with him instead of Chuck, though it could’ve been better.

In fact, the first words he said to me were in the form of an apology.

“I’m real sorry I got you guys into this mess and caused Riley to storm off,” he said, dodging eye contact but seeming sincere. We were at a streetlight waiting to cross over to the other side with even more buildings to look over. “Normally, if I stuck to my guns and did something he objected to, eventually he’d give in because he doesn’t like doing things alone. So it’s kind of weird that he’s doing this…”

“Sounds like you know him pretty well,” I responded, trying not to sound as pained as I really was.

“Better than anybody else, unfortunately,” he sighed, “and sorry again for the way he’s been to you guys. He’s pretty crappy to people he doesn’t know and only slightly less crappy to the people he does know.”

I figured I might as well not let a decent conversation die, so I tried to give it a jumpstart. “If you don’t mind me asking, why are you and him still friends, then?”

He sheepishly smiled at me and said, “Misery loves company, I guess. We sometimes mutually benefit from tolerating each other.”

Because he forced a laugh, so did I, and that made things all the more painful just when they were starting to become bearable.

He paused and looked around, taking in our surroundings and making it obvious that we were looking for someone. Squinting against the rising sun, he said, “He can’t have gone far. He can run fast, but that’s only when he’s either playing baseball or getting chased.”

“…Chased?” I asked, my thoughts snagging on it.

“Long story. It involves dogs. Uh…” he replied, glancing around again.

“Gotcha.”

“See, another reason why I don’t think he’d go this far,” he went on, a smug smirk creeping on his face, “is that he’s probably only doing this to get a reaction out of me. It’s the kind of thing he would do, anyway.”

I took the liberty of being the quiet one and nodded to show I was listening, and the conversation kind if died after that. We walked on aimlessly with me leading the way since I knew where we were going, but I wasn’t completely there – my mind was still swimming. What’s the point of having a friend if the only purpose was to be miserable together? They had to have cared about each other to some extent. There had to be something other than mutual pity.

I really tried to remind myself that not everybody was like Tegan and I and had grown up knowing each other inside and out; not everybody liked to hang out with someone who was so in-tune with you and so like you that everything was just at peace. I had just met Chuck and Riley that morning. I didn’t know anything about them other than what Chuck put on his blog.

Along with that, the nagging scratch Andy left on me with his dry tone was still bleeding a bit. I pushed it to the back of my mind and kept on focusing on our two newest members, though. I can’t blame him for what he said; he was human and he had emotions, and like any near-celebrity, he had to vent at some point.

Kinda wish it wasn’t me he vented at, though…

My own stupid thoughts had stopped spinning my head around when a sudden loud voice snapped me out of it a ways away.

“Hey!” The voice was distinctive – just joking enough to seem chipper, and just clear enough to be strong.

Chuck and I turned around in unison to see – of course – Riley standing behind us, palms up and a wide smile across his arrogant face. It was like he was expecting some kind of ceremonial reunion from the bouncy way he walked.

“I knew you’d come looking for me, Siege,” he grinned at Chuck, getting close enough to hang an arm around his shoulder.

“I kinda had to,” he grumbled.

“Aw, you need me.”

“We need to cooperate, even if you think it’s all bogus,” Chuck insisted.

I witnessed one of the most insane staring contests in my life right then. Completely silent, as if they were communicating through telepathy, they just glared at one another, not even blinking for about thirty seconds. I looked at a telephone pole, the buildings behind us, the streets up ahead and the cars passing by in order to not look like some sort of referee in the situation. Thankfully, though, after I was through looking at distractions, they were done and Riley had cleared his throat.

“Fine, I’ll bite…” he mumbled, adjusting his baseball cap.

Despite the obvious tension, I still spotted a shared smile between them as we headed back to the band’s apartment. Riley just nodded at me to acknowledge the fact that I was there and existed, and then we were off.

The city streets didn’t feel so loud as when they did as Chuck and I traversed the town in search of Riley. That was one problem solved, anyhow. By the time we got back, I was sure things would get sorted out. They’d maybe get to know the band, maybe we’d play cards or something to pass the time while the school day went on without us. We’d be just as tight-knit as a group of eight as a group of six.

That’s what my optimistic side kept telling me, however. I was still hung up on Andy’s words and how they didn’t stop stinging even after a half hour of being away, and when we saw the apartment building, that’s when my optimistic side just gave out completely.

The three of us stopped at the corner to wait for the stoplight to change, and I had to do a double take when I looked at the flat.

Flames were sprouting from the windows. Normally, I’d have just done a double take and worried about the band and whether or not they’d get out okay with their equipment intact, but when I counted what floor it was on and realized it was the seventh floor all the way at one end, that’s when I let out a little whimper of fear and thus attracted the attention of Chuck and Riley, who both asked me what was wrong.

“The band’s apartment,” I stammered. “Their room. It’s on fire. Look.”

Maybe it was the fact that I hadn’t expressed much emotion at all around either of them up to that point and the open showing of terror caught them by surprise, but they definitely looked, and they most definitely jumped out of their skins. The band was up there along with Tegan, and if they were in danger, by default, the universe’s situation had just become a whole lot more threatening to this planet.