The Unforgettable

(CHAPTER FROM CHRISTOPH'S POINT OF VIEW)

“We need to remember the goals here while making this transition.”

Bill-Ross stands in front of the room at the white board as we all stare at him in our hot ass suits in this hit ass room as he adamantly goes over the same ten points he made in the beginning of this meeting thirty minutes ago. Why did I agree to go on this trip? I’m sick of being in this stuffy room, yesterday it felt like the meetings would never end. . . There’s a million things I’d rather be doing than sitting in here right now. Bill Ross’s droning fades out after a while of thinking of things I’d rather be doing then Gianna floods my mind.

I pull my phone out of my pocket to see if I have any missed calls or new messages, nothing. Dammit Gianna, what the hell?

I look at the time, it’s 7:30, she’s at work by now. I really hope she calls during break or at least when she gets off. It’s been two days.

I think of the night I left, she looked at me so remorsefully, so pitifully. I sigh and shake my head trying to shake the thoughts away as I shove my phone and hand deep into my pocket. I try to refocus on Bill’s talking rather than my fucked up thoughts.

When the meeting’s finally dismissed I walk out while everybody else breaks into a buzz of chatter. I go to call her again but stop short because it’s pointless if she’s working, I’ll just be even more disappointed when I get the voicemail. I’ll text her that’s what.

I go to typing out my message when Taylor falls into step beside me and slaps his hand against my shoulder.

“I was ready to blow my fucking brains out Jesus Christ, how many times did he say the word ‘goals?” Taylor laughs.

I don’t, I’m trying to finish the text Taylor seems offended by that.

“Yo, got a stick up your ass? What’s up?”

I look away from my phone to him, “sorry. . .” I reply absentmindedly.

“I’m ready for a beer already. . .” He wriggles his eyebrows, “maybe hit up one of these dispensaries around here, get fuckin’ toasted tonight.”

I laugh at Taylor rather than at what he’s said, he is by far the least mature of all the people I hang out with. Only he would go out on a business trip and want to get fucked up.

“Chris, tell me you’re down man!”

I push the door open that leads to outside and remember how cold it is. “I don’t know man, I need to be able to function tomorrow.”

“You will dude!”

He’s staring at me with eager eyes and I sigh, I’m really not in the mood I’m actually really bummed out because all I can think about is Gianna and she’s ignoring me. Not that I don’t deserve it.

“I’ll catch back up with you at the end of the work day and let you know,” I say finally.

Taylor groans, “that’s a fucking cop out answer but whatever, you better say yes.”

He leaves disappearing back into the building. I go back to my phone and start typing, at first it’s a long message unnecessary information added so I delete a third of the text and send it off. When I’m done, I get a message from Taylor saying we’re about to have another meeting in fifteen minutes. I curse several times to myself, stop at the urinal, grab a snickers bar almost swallow it in one bite, grab a cup of water and return to the meeting room to prepare for another few sleep worthy hours in this room.

I’m finally sitting in the office chair in my room after a long cool shower, I scroll through my phone hoping that my phone will ring in my hand but instead I get a loud banging on my door. I stand up, look through the peep hole to see Taylor’s goofy ass. I sigh, damn do I really want to do this? I don’t feel like going out tonight.

He bangs on the door again as my hand rests on the door knob, I let out a breath then open the door up.

“Get dressed beefcakes we’re leavin’ in ten minutes.”

I remember that I haven’t dressed since the shower and that I’ve answered the door in my briefs and open robe.

I tie the robe closed, “I don’t really feel like going out man.”

“Nah! Don’t want to hear your shit, I’ll be back pounding on your door at 9:08. You need to cheer the hell up man.”

And Taylor bee bops his way down the hall. I curse, return to the room and push the door closed hard. I don’t feel like dealing with his crazy ass schemes and bullshit. I check my phone again, still nothing. She’s not going to call tonight even if she could, it’s too late she’s in bed already I’m sure of it. Man! I suppose I’ll just drink a couple beers if I get passed a spliff I’ll take a couple of puffs and that’s it, nothing crazy, I need to keep a clear head and get through these next couple of days.

I curse more as I get ready and just as Taylor’s about to pound on the door I fling it open, he grins wildly at me, yells some obscenities then we walk outside the hotel lobby where Mark and Josh are waiting for us. We all pile into Josh’s Jeep and hoop and holler as we drive around town looking for recreational dispensaries. We didn’t know starting this adventure that there was a difference between medicinal and recreational. But after a while of driving around, talking shit about each other and laughing we get to a place called, Roots With Glutes. I only got an 1/8th of some bud called “Blue Dream,” but the guys maxed out how much they can buy in one place. Josh got some weird taffy looking stuff too called Wax. This is new to me, all I know about is Weed. There's dirt then there's dank and you can use that to make pot brownies. They've got lollipops, gummies, brownies, krispies, sex lube it blows my mind. But apparently, wax is concentrated THC, it's supposed to be a purer form. . . I don’t know if I’m prepared to do that, they call it dabbing. I thought that was a dance so I’m pretty out of the loop with all this new shit. Taylor and Josh on the other hand smoke every once in a while so they’re more experienced and excited about this stuff.

After we leave the dispensary Taylor says we need to stop at a liquor store. Then it’s the gas station for blunt wrappers and rolling papers which he rolls and we smoke two blunts and two joints on the way back to the hotel. I’m sucked into rotation after wanting to tap out several times by being called a bitch and pussy by three guys at once.

The last time I smoked weed was sometime in college, that was at least two years ago. I don’t think I smoked this much at once when I did smoke. It seems like there's a haze around my peripheral vision. Like one of those dream sequences on a TV show. My brain is like a cloud, my eyes feel almost sealed shut and there’s a whooshing sound in my ears. Taylor says something as Josh puts his jeep in park and it makes the whole car roar with laughter. I only laugh because the way they’re laughing is so funny. Mark's red contorted face, he looks like he's about to choke. I can't see Taylor in the front passenger seat but I can hear his cackle of a laugh. Josh is slumped low all the way down in his seat bright red too laughing so hard he's silent. It feels like I cracked a rib I’m laughing so hard, it's uncomfortable. I feel like I’m suffocating, I have to get out of this boiling car.

Everything including my movement feels like it's in slow motion. I fumble with the door handle and finally spill out, they’re still hooping and hollering not making a move to get out. I shut the door behind me and stumble across the street from the parking lot into the lobby. Elevator, elevator, where the hell is it?

Ding!

I turn my head in the direction and see the silver doors across the populated room. Fuck these people are going to know I’m high. Ugh, just stay up right, stay calm and make it to the elevator before Taylor and those fuckboys catch up to me, they’ll be loud as fuck and blow my cover.

I drag my feet across the lobby, it feels like I’m walking across a pool. An old lady looks up at me and I flash my eyes to the elevator, just stay focused dude, you got it.

I make it close to the elevator at what feels like the speed of a sloth when a lady decides to walk directly in front of me, towards me. I get tripped up and not sure which way to go, we end up doing that stupid, “which way you gonna go?” back and forth dance but I finally make it out of the trap and to the elevator. I smack the button a few times, slowly it makes it’s way to me and I hurry on the elevator and smack the four button and close door button before anyone else comes close to the doors. Finally they close, the elevator dings and I’m riding up. I close my eyes as I go up and take deep breaths to calm my heart. When it dings for the fourth time and the elevator doors open I stumble out and make my way to my room, thankfully no one comes out into the hallway.

It takes three tries but I finally get my key card to work in the door and when I get inside, the door slams shut. I shuffle to the bed and start fumbling with my jean's button and zipper. Pulling my pants off and throwing them on the bed something falls out of the pocket to my feet. I reach down and pick up the black plastic container my bud sits in. I toss it on the office chair and collapse onto my bed, head spinning fast.

I feel like I’m hallucinating my mind bounces from idea to daydream to terror and all over the place. I need to stop thinking, I need to settle down.

I roll over onto my back and open my eyes, I’ve left the lamp on. I squint it's so bright and reach over to the table and switch the lamp off. It's now pitch black, I groan and close my eyes again. If I ever smoke again I refuse to smoke this much at once. . . Maybe I can share some with Anna, oh my sweet Gianna. I miss you baby, please call me. I bang my fist to my forehead and with my other hand I feel around for my phone finding it just barely in my pants pocket beside me. I stare at the bright glowing screen and see it’s going to be midnight soon, she still hasn’t contacted me. I’m going to call again.

I press her name and it rings, it rings five times then her sweet voice speaks, “It’s Gianna,” she takes a breath. “I’m sorry I missed your call I'll call you back, leave a message if you’d like.” My heart tightens when it’s over and the automated message lady starts talking then it beeps.

“Hey Anna,” I say breathing loudly into the phone. “I really miss you. . . Call me, I need to talk to you. . .” I sigh looking up at the red light that's attached to a fire alarm on the ceiling. “I’m really high right now and I just keep thinking about shit. . . I don't know. . . I can’t get you off my mind, I need you Gianna, please call me baby.” My eyes tear up and I start to speak more but there’s a knock at my door. I sigh and hang up, swallow the lump in my throat and blink a few times. Then I sit up and the door seems so far away. The light from the hall shines under the door and through the peephole. I think I see a shadow and the knocking taps again.

As I make my way to the door I still feel like I'm in slow motion and wobbly, I peer into the peephole but I don’t see anyone.

“Who is it?” I ask trying to sound intimidating.

I feel a wave of paranoia. What if it's staff, the guys got busted, snitched on me and hotel management knows I'm high.

No response, I wait a couple seconds longer staring out of the peephole and nothing so I turn back heading for the bed again and the knocking resumes.

“Who is it?” I ask again before getting to the door.

Nothing. Holy shit am I hearing shit, am I seriously hallucinating? You're not supposed to hallucinate from weed, is this shit laced? What the fucking fuck? I feel my heartbeat quicken.

They knock again, “Room Service,” calls a quiet voice from the other side.

I get to the door and look out again I still see no one, “I didn’t order room service,” I say.

They don’t respond and there’s still no movement, I wait a minute longer and finally head for the bed again. I guess they heard me and went to find the right room. I finally lie back down and the knocking starts up again even louder this time and they call out room service again.

Now I’m irritated and I storm over to the door, blindly feel the knob and snatch the door open, “I didn’t order any fucking room service,” I nearly yell.

In pushes a blonde into my room, I look around the hallway and see no one else. Did what I think just happened just happen? I turn back around to my room, shut the door and turn the light switch up for light.

There standing in front of me in a black lace robe and nothing else is the one and only, Leana.

There’s no way dude, how high am I? There’s no fucking way.

And yet she speaks, “Miss me Chris?”

Instantly I begin to whisper, “Leana what the hell are you doing here?”

She laughs lightly as she draws closer to me, “why are you whispering?”

Her hands go to the back of my neck, she gets fistfuls of my hair, “Leana I’m serious. What the fuck are you doing here, why are you in my room, how did you get here?” my voice is normal now, demanding.

I try to think if I saw her on the plane, I don’t recall her face at all.

She pouts, “what do you mean what am I doing here? I flew like you did, silly. Don’t you want me here?”

With her hands still tangled in my hair, Leana yanks my head back, my face is towards the ceiling. Her lips go to my ear, breath tickling and I close my eyes, inhaling. She smells like perfume and Big Red gum, something she doesn't go without. Her tongue runs along my earlobe and I shake my head.

“You need to leave, now." My tongue feels thick. "I can’t do this, I can’t-“

“Oh but baby, yes you can,” she whispers.

Her hand grabs my crotch roughly and she bites my neck hard and it stupidly turns me on, fuck there's no turning back! My hand grabs a handful of her lace covered ass. Her hot breath leaves my neck, trails down my chest and she squats down in front of me, I lean my head back against the door and shut my eyes. I can’t do this, I can’t do this, she needs to leave right now.

Her fingers slide under my waistband, I pry at her fingers but she's got a tight lock. My legs feel like the shape of logs and the feel asleep. She slides my briefs down, I feel her breath on me.

Chris you cannot fucking do this!

I start to move my left leg above her head so that I can step over her.

Then her lips softly press against my member, I suck in a breath, no, not again.

Her tongue runs along it then she takes me completely in her mouth, I quiver with pleasure putting my leg back down and leaning against the door.

You can’t do this again, you can’t betray Gianna again.

As Gianna’s name pops into my head I open my eyes and look down at Leana’s face but I see Gianna’s eyes. I feel Gianna's lips and feel Gianna's tongue as I push myself further into this warm wet mouth. I haven’t felt the touch of a woman in what’s felt like years but it’s only been a couple months.

The tugging makes me grunt, I squeeze my eyes shut as Gianna’s naked body appears in my mind, I feel her soft hair brush against my face as I take a fistful of this woman’s and shove myself deeper. Gianna moans in my head, leans in close and I take her nipples into my mouth as she pushes me inside of her.

As I thrust in my fantasy I thrust in real life. When she moans in my mind I moan too squeezing my eyes shut, breaking a sweat and holding on to this girl’s head for dear life.

Finally Gianna quivers and loudly orgasms and so do I and only when I hear coughing and choking do I open my eyes. Gianna disappears and Leana transforms into her self again.

She sits on the floor trying to catch her breath, “mm. Big boy hasn’t had much attention since he dumped me huh?” Composure gathered she smiles up at me, “glad I’m back?”

I am the biggest fucking douchebag in the world, what in the actual fuck is wrong with me? I shake my head and groan as I pull up my briefs from around my ankles. Leana looks up at me all doe-eyed from the floor.

“Ready for round two?” she giggles and hops to her feet.

I put my hand in my hair and shake my head, “Leana you need to leave.”

She looks pissed, “what the hell do you mean I need to leave? No not anymore, you’ve accepted my invitation now shitbag.”

Fuck I’m too high for this, why the hell is she here? I swear she’s the devil, I swear it!

I put my hands on her shoulders and position her near the door, I try to open it but she pushes it closed.

“No Chris! What you blow a load and push me off, fuck you!”

“Leana please leave this was a mistake, I didn’t ask you to come here, I didn’t want you here. I told you I was done with this shit.”

“Yeah but you didn’t stop me from sucking your dick just then did you?”

I groan, “yeah and that was a huge fucking mistake now leave!” I practically yell.

We bicker back and forth at the door and another knock sounds, we both gasp and freeze. I look through the peephole to see Josh on the other side. Shit! Why, why now? I swear it’s this god damn she-devil, she brings me hell when ever she pops up.

Before Leana knows it, I fling the door open and push her out, she curses me and Josh looks her up and down as she sashays down the hall. Then he looks me up and down giving me the most judgmental look and pushes his way into my room slamming the door shut.

“What the fuck bro, I thought you were done with that shit?! he still sounds out of it thank God I'm not the only one.

“Done with what?” I ask stupidly.

“Fucking that whore! I thought you and your girl worked your shit out!”

I shake my head, “it’s not even like that Josh. She just came by to tell me something.”

“Oh, I’m sure she said a lot! Bro come on!" He yells. "You can't lie to me about shit like that, she had your dick juice all over her face!” he’s genuinely upset.

I'm less defensive now and more sad, almost in tears but for another reason, fuck this emotional high brain.

“Gianna’s not even talking to me right now!”

“So you run to Leana?” Josh makes a face.

“No, no dude! Josh I’m telling you, she showed up to my room, I was trying to fall asleep, she hollered room service and stormed in when I opened the door.”

Josh sighs and shakes his head, he’s actually thinking about it and adding up the scenario, considering my side. This is what bros do, they listen to each other, I can say Josh is one of my closer friends. He looks at me again a lot calmer and he sits at the little round table.

“Did you fuck her?” he asks finally.

I sit down too and shake my head, “she gave me a blowjob, but all I could think about was Gianna, that’s literally who I thought was with me when Leana was in here. . . High as fuck. And when I snapped out of it I made her leave, it was a huge, huge god damn mistake.”

Josh nods, he’s thinking then he clears his throat, “you can’t tell Gianna about this, you can’t tear her world apart twice man. She’s a good lady, you’re lucky you got her to stay with you after the first time.” He smacks his teeth and shakes his head, “I wish I could’ve talked to you before you went and did that man, every man knows you don’t tell on yourself after an affair. Just cut the shit off and forget it happened."

I sigh, yeah I wish shit was different too man.