Rain

I looked out the window. Rain. Again. It was always raining here. The sun would tease us for maybe a day or two, only to give us at least a week of rain in return. And to think it was already late May. School's done in three weeks and then its summer! But what good's a summer without good weather...?

I looked down at my brown hair. It was getting long, but it was still too short for me to be content with it. There's always something I'm not happy with about my appearance.

I brought my knees up to my chest and held them. Why am I always feeling so sad? Could this weather be impacting me?

A low rumble startled me out of my sitting position. Great. A storm. Just what we all need when all we want is to see the sun shine.

I moved from my cushiony chair to my bed and grabbed my laptop before sitting down. I waited for the log-on screen. Once I was in, I opened up Chrome and logged onto Facebook.

There he was. Christopher Taint. He had a new status update: "Party's cancelled. What's with this weather?" Michelle had already commented, "Boo! :("

They started dating at the beginning of this school year. It ended with her cheating on him with a 'college dude'. She cried and begged for him back - it was right in the middle of the hallway at school - but he just said "I'm done Michelle. This happened before and I took you back only because you promised it wouldn't happen again. We're over - for good." I have to admit, hearing him say that to her made my insides jump for joy...but it caused him pain and sadness. I guess he really loved her.

But that's the strange thing. We love someone who loves someone else who may in fact love someone else. When Christopher and Michelle got together I had to be happy for him even though it killed me inside...but seeing the pain she put him through afterwards killed me even more.

"Hey!" Christopher said on chat.

"Hey :)" I said back.

"Sucks about the weather, huh?"

"Yeah, I was looking forward to the party."

"I was too.

Actually, I'm surprised you said you'd go with me. You never go to parties; you always have something to study for."

"Well you need friend support right now."

"Thank you. I know I don't act like it but I'm happy you're my friend."

"You're welcome, Chris." After their breakup (which was two months ago, dating for a total of seven months), my dad was shot on the job – he's a police officer. I had liked Christopher for a long time before that, but after my dad was hospitalized, we became closer friends.

After a break in and robbery of a bank, my dad was driving, chasing the criminals and was shot by their accomplices who had been following him. He didn't know he was being trailed. But he was shot which led to a car accident as well. He was rushed to the hospital and has been on life support ever since. Chris and I have known each other since we were little kids because our parents were close. He was one of the first to know – that is before it was all over the news.

"What are your plans for the weekend?" He asked. My cheeks grew warm. He never asked me questions like this.

"Well I don't have any since the party was cancelled."

"Do you wanna get together and do something?" He asked me. My heart stopped. At least metaphorically.

"Yeah, that'd be great! :)"

"Awesome, how about right now?"

"Sure :)" I said. I looked down at myself. Even though we got out of school only three hours ago, I was already in my pyjamas.

"I'll meet you at the park by your house."

"Okay." I said. He went offline. I closed my laptop and jumped off my bed. I quickly changed back into my clothes that I wore earlier. I brushed my hair and put it in a ponytail. I threw on my jacket and left my room, grabbing my phone on the way out.

I walked down the hallway and down the stairs, only to be stopped by my mother.

"Liza? Is that you?"

"Yes mom."

"Come here."

"I can't."

"Please," she said coming out of the kitchen. "Where are you going?" She asked as she noticed my jacket.

"To meet Christopher at the park."

"Can I talk to you first?"

"Fine," I said with a sigh as I followed her into the kitchen.

"Sweetie...I'm worried about you."

"Why?"

"You always seem so sad."

"It's just the weather."

"Is it really?"

"I don't know...maybe."

"You can talk to me, honey."

"Mom I'm fine."

"No you're not. You spend hours shut in your room on that tumbley website –"

"It's tumblr! And I said I'm fine," I said as I left the kitchen and quickly put on my shoes. I opened the door to leave.

"Elizabeth, please!" My mom begged. I walked out the door and closed it behind me. My phone vibrated. It was a text from Christopher.

"Hey! I'm leaving as soon as I can. Michelle is bombarding me - tell you when I get there."

"I hope everything's OK." I replied. I pulled my hood up and walked down the little ally that led to the park. I sat down on a bench under the sheltered area to wait for him. I got restless so I began pacing.

I let my hood fall down and stepped into the rain. I let the rain fall onto my face. It was a nice feeling. It felt fresh. Why have I always been so against this weather?

My mom's words came into my head. You always seem so sad. Maybe I'm against this weather because I'm always sad. I'm against it because it is me. It is my sadness…the sadness I won't let out…

"Hey Liza!"

"Oh hey Chris. You got here fast," I said.

"Yeah...Michelle is really mad."

"Why? Last I checked, she cheated on you," I said.

"It's because I'm hanging out with you…"

"You - you told her?" I asked.

"Well yeah. She asked me what my plans were since the party was cancelled. I told her I was gonna hang out with you. And then she said 'that girl from math and English? Ew! Why?'" he said mimicking her voice.

"What else did she say?" I asked feeling hollow.

"It doesn't matter," he said trying to brush it off.

"What did she say, Chris?" I asked a little louder and firmer.

"Here, just look," he said as he handed me his phone already opened up to their conversation. I scrolled to the part where I was mentioned.

"She's a dirty slut. Why would you waste your time with her?"

"That doesn't mean much coming from you, Michelle."

"Fine. Have fun getting aids."

"You're being immature. Just stop talking to me."

"You know she likes you. I see the way she looks at you all class and how she ogles over you in the hallways…it's pathetic. She's gross."

"Does she really?"

"Yeah! I heard that she has a picture of you next to her bed."

"Stop lying. No one you know would ever talk to her."

"Meaning what Chris? That she's a helpless bottom feeder?"

"Shut up! You're putting words in my mouth!"

"You implied it."

"I'm blocking you."

"Wait I'm sorry."

"Bye."

"She's going to use you for your body. Just don't say I didn't warn you."

"MICHELLE WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM?"

"I don't want to see you get hurt."

"You are a bitch! You cheated on me, remember? You have seen me get hurt by your own hands! Leave me and Elizabeth alone."

"How do you think I can tell she'll hurt you? I know…I've seen it firsthand."

"What do you want?"

"Another chance."

"You had that. The first time you cheated on me."

"I will never do it again."

"You said that the first time. I have to go meet Elizabeth. I hope you were lying about everything you said about her." And that was the end of their conversation. I felt sick. I felt dirty. He hopes everything was a lie?

"I told you it didn't matter."

"What do you mean you hope everything was a lie?" I said as tears pricked my eyes.

"I don't know what to believe."

"You've known me your WHOLE life, Christopher! You know me!"

"I know…I…"

"What?!"

"I'm sorry."

"No you're not. Here," I said as I gave him his phone and started to walk away. My jacket was soaked through – the rain had intensified. My tears fell and I took a deep breath. Why would he believe anything that she would say? We're supposed to be each other's support!

"Liza!"

"Don't call me that!" I snapped as I turned around. I continued walking. I felt a hand on my wrist.

"Please. Don't walk away. I put you through pain. I'm sorry."

"What are you talking about?" I asked.

"It took me my whole life…so far, to realize that I like you. I've walked away from you so many times for people like Michelle. I will always be sorry for that. But I can't watch you walk away from me. Even if I do deserve it." He said. I was speechless. I didn't expect him to even go after me. "Now would be a good time to say something." I remained silent. "All I want is a chance with you."

"Why?"

"Uh – because I like you, Elizabeth!"

"Since when?"

"Remember the night you found out about your dad? And you came over and cried in my arms. I think I realized then…but for some stupid reason I thought you didn't like me. So I pushed back my feelings and hid them and lied to myself. And I am so sorry…wait. You do like me, right?"

"Yes, you goof," I said as I closed the space between us and kissed him. "Do you want to come over?" I asked him when we broke apart.

"Yeah. I haven't seen your family in a long time. How's your mom by the way?" He asked as he entwined his fingers in mine.

"She's okay. It's been tough without my dad…" I said as we began the short walk to my house.

"How far along is she?"

"Seven months."

"Wow. She big?"

"Oh yeah."

"And your little brothers?"

"See for yourself," I said as I opened the door.

"Liza, you're back already?! I'm sorry darling – oh! Hi Chris!" She said eyeing our hands. "Will you be staying for dinner?"

"That would be great," he said with a crooked smile.

My mom cooked – asking Chris questions the entire time. My two brothers bounded down the stairs as soon as they smelled the food. We all sat at the table – there were laughs and lots of chatter.

"Thanks Liza," Chris said to me afterwards.

"For what?"

"Giving me a chance. And for letting me hang out with your awesome family."

"Thank you," I said.

"I think the correct terminology is 'you're welcome'. But for what?"

"Making me feel happy," I said as I kissed him. We said goodbye and he walked out into the rain. Maybe the clouds were crying for me. Because I couldn't. I said goodnight to my family and went into my room. I changed into my pajamas and went straight to bed. I fell asleep with ease.

The next morning I woke up and walked over to my window. Something seemed wrong…it was too quiet. I pulled back the curtains and sun filled my room. I almost cringed from it. I slowly walked up to the window and placed my hand on it. My heart felt alive. I smiled and felt truly happy for the first time in a long time.