Even the Sun Sets in Paradise

I sat in silence for a few moments, unable to process what she had just said. Did I hear wrong? Was this some kind of joke? Was I dreaming?
“Please explain this to me,” Auntie Julie said quietly, reaching out for my hand.
“There must be some mistake, this isn’t right. I can’t be pregnant,” I cried.
“The blood test is 99% effective and the urine test is 97%. Sweetie, you’re pregnant, there’s no mistake.”
“There’s a chance there could be,” I protested.
“Think about it; you’ve had the stomach aches, you’ve been throwing up, your period is late. It all adds up.”
“What about the fact I haven’t slept with anyone?”
“Jenna, don’t lie to me. You’ve been through something terrible and it’s perfectly normal to rebel or whatever when you’ve suffered for so long. A lot of teenagers go off the rails after going through a hard time. I won’t be angry; I just want to get you the support you need.”
“I’m not going off the rails and I don’t need any support because I haven’t slept with anyone. You know the only times I’ve gone out are when I’m with Ellis and the guys or with Mel.”
“There’s obviously something, babies can’t just come out of nowhere.” I thought carefully, but Julie and I were both thinking the same thing. After everything with George, I couldn’t help but worry. Had something happened? Maybe I was drugged? Maybe I was knocked unconscious? It was massively unlikely but I couldn’t help but fear the worst. How else could I get pregnant? It didn’t seem like there was any rational explanation for any of this so my mind instantly filled with terrifying ideas.
“How far am I?” I asked, hoping that would give me some clue as to how this might have happened.
“4-5 weeks.” I carefully thought back into my mind as to what I had done that week, and a thought struck me. The party. I had been so drunk I couldn’t remember a thing. Now I was starting to wonder if maybe it wasn’t just alcohol my drink got spiked with. Rowan said I disappeared around half past one, assuming I went to bed. Maybe I’d been with a guy. Once again, I cursed myself for getting drunk and/or drugged. It had ruined my life once and now it had done it again. It seemed no matter what I did, I could never escape the single thing that had destroyed my mother, ruined my innocence and almost took my life. When would it end? It scared me so much – not knowing who the father of my unborn child was. I didn’t even have a clue. Was it rape? Did I consent to it? Was it someone decent? Was it a complete idiot? For some reason, it didn’t even seem real. I wasn’t freaking out as much as I would have expected, but maybe it hadn’t quite sunk in. I was going to be a mum. I was going to be a mum. You hear all these stories in the magazines, and you hear about it on Teen Mom and stuff, but you never expect for it to happen to you. No matter what I did for the rest of my life, I was always going to be the girl who got pregnant in high school. In my old school I was known as the girl who got beat up, and I thought I’d finally escaped the name-calling, but I was wrong. Not only was I fifteen and pregnant, I also had no recollection of who the god damn father was.
My thoughts were interrupted by the sound of the front door opening. The guys all piled in, sitting themselves down on the sofas around us.
“Oh my god, is something wrong?” Ellis gasped, his expression suddenly worried.
“I’m fucking pregnant!” I cried. Ellis’s fist tensed up. Rowan had a look of pure confusion on his face. Layton, as expected, threw a strop like a fucking girl and went outside. Auntie Julie dropped her head in her hands, an exasperated sigh escaping her lips.
“Well done Princess, getting pregnant in high school, congratulations!” Cyrus laughed, clapping his hands. As I said before, he never took anything seriously, and right now, that pissed me off.
“Fuck you man!” Ellis screamed, “Not now!” I felt my stomach churn and ran upstairs to the bathroom. I wasn’t sure if the sickness was because of the baby or because of the shock, but I hated it. There was no way I could endure nine months of this.
Why the hell did I just announce it to the guys?! I left the bathroom, collapsing onto my bed, screaming into my pillow.
Knowing what Cyrus and Layton are like, the whole world would know by tomorrow, including George. He already wanted me dead, now he’d make doubly sure that was exactly what would happen. What about my baby? My baby would never be safe as long as George lived. I’d never wished death upon anyone; not on my dad who abandoned me, not on my mum who couldn’t care less about me, not on any of the people who teased me and used it against me…but I did on George. He could rot in hell for all I cared.
There was a knock on the door, which made me jump. I quickly sat up, wiping my tears with my sleeve.
“Hun, are you alright?” Ellis asked worriedly, wrapping me into a reassuring hug.
“No,” I sighed, fighting back tears.
“How did this happen? Who’s the father?”
“I don’t know, I seriously have no idea. Ellis please help me.”
“Of course I’m gonna help you, I’ll help you through all of this,” he promised.
“Thank you,” I whispered, “It happened at the party. I’m not sure how or who with but I’m 4-5 weeks pregnant and can’t remember a thing so it’s gotta be from the party.” I could see tears in Ellis’s eyes, but he held them back, his fists clenched tightly.
“Okay, who were you with at the party?” he asked calmly, trying his best to stay composed.
“Rowan, that’s all I remember. Cyrus came over and talked to us for a bit but then he left again. I didn’t even talk to Layton. I went to dance with Rowan and some other people for a while but that’s as far as I got,” I explained.
“Okay, do you want me to go and get gay boy? He might know what happened,” he told me, which made me laugh.
“Fuck, why did I tell them?!” I cried, cursing myself for being so stupid.
“God knows Jenna. You are a special child,” he winked, “But I’ll make sure they don’t tell anyone. Trust me; I’ll kill them if they do.” I nodded, smiling as I gave him another hug.
“I’ll go find Rowan,” he told me, glumly leaving the room.