Drop to Hold You
001
Harry's sixth year had just begun. Announcements were made and now students were all in the Great Hall feasting and chatting. He was relieved to be in the spacious castle. Even though he loved the Weasley's and the Burrow, it was nice to be truly home. Ron was deeply in conversation with some of the other guys at the Gryffindor table, and Harry was just enjoying his meal, delighted that he hadn't much to worry about in the coming school year. He took a big swig from his goblet and his eyes scanned the tables, lined with smiling students and a few frightful first years. He paused when he got to Malfoy, and lowered his cup onto the table, watching. Malfoy was talking to a first year. He didn't have a snide look on his face, and if this was the first time Harry had ever seen him, he would never suspect that he was mean in any way. He was gesturing wildly and the younger boy looked enraptured by his tale. Harry snapped out of it when Hermione's fingers laced around his bicep and she leaned onto him so she could whisper in his ear.
"Look who's got her eye on you, Harry," she sing-songed and discreetly pointed to Ginny Weasley who was being chatted up by Dean. She looked bored with him, and her eyes found Harry's. She smiled shyly at Harry, tucking a strand of red behind her ear. His smile in response was watered down. He looked back at Hermione and drew a breath. She scooted off of him.
"Er, I guess it's 'bout time I let you on, then," he began, and Hermione gave him a confused look. "I'm gay." His voice was barely over a whisper.
"What?" she leaned close to him and he mumbled the two words again. "Harry, I really can't hear you," she said. He sighed and put both his wrists on the table, as if to steady himself.
"I like blokes," he said calmly, only where she could hear. He looked around quickly to make sure no one had been eavesdropping. Hermione's eyes got wide right before her face opened up into a grin.
"Well, that's just-" she was excited, but Harry cut her off.
"Don't go shouting about it. No one else knows." He could tell his face fell, and he hoped she hadn't noticed. Only one other person had known. She must not have because she pretended to lock her lips and she winked at him. It brought a smile back to his face.
"So, what classes are you taking this year?" she changed the subject. Ron looked over, mouth stuffed full of the ham that formerly occupied his plate.
"Haven't you got anything better to talk about, 'Mione?" His tone was jovial, but she still rolled her eyes at him anyway.
"Well, Ronald, some of us are here to learn." Harry's impression of her was spot on, and the two boys burst out laughing. Hermione laughed a little herself, then shook her head muttering,
"Boys..." Harry didn't have room for dessert, so he just talked with Seamus, Hermione, and Ron. He caught sight of Draco laughing with his new friend and a few old ones. Harry's stomach flipped. Long after the conversation had turned to Quidditch, Ron looked over at Hermione.
"'Mione, how do you know your classes when schedules don't get passed out 'til the morning?" he mumbled the question around a biscuit, and had three more in his hand.
"Never you mind," she said. Harry ignored it, she was always exponentially more prepared than he was so the fact that she knew ahead of time didn't even phase him.
***
That night, they were piled in the common room. The girls were on the couch, and a few of the boys were gathered on the floor in front of the unlit hearth. Harry, Ron, Seamus, Neville, and a few first years were talking about their summers. Ron didn't have much to tell, Seamus got a new broom, some of the first years talked about their confusion in Diagon Alley and it made the older boys smile warmly. Neville happily announced that he decided that he was going to tech Herbology. After everyone was through congratulating him, everyone's eyes fell on Harry. He cleared his throat even and it still felt tight. "I didn't do much at all," he finally said. He let out a relieved sigh, for a moment he thought his secret would shoot out of his mouth, but he wasn't ready.
"Well, Merlin, you're a right boring git, aren't you?" Seamus jeered, and the group of boys erupted in laughter. Harry's mood lifted immediately. He and Ron taught a first year called Miles Helms how to levitate small things, and Neville animatedly explained something about a plant that had tried to attack him in its old age. The whole room felt happier than Harry could ever remember it feeling. After some time, they decided it was time to head to bed. A few of the guys called a halfhearted 'Gnight' to Hermione who was now alone on the couch, reading. Harry stayed behind to talk to her, and he was standing by the arm of the couch. She jabbed him in the ribs with her elbow, and he looked down, offended. He didn't say anything, though, when he noticed she was pointing. Seamus' shirt was pulled up almost halfway in the back, showing off his pale back, those two dimples that drew Harry's eyes downward to his small, but kinda cute butt. Harry couldn't appreciate the view. He could never see Seamus that way, with anyone come to think of it.
"Come off it," Harry said, smiling. Hermione was still chuckling to herself. "Thank you, Hermione." Saying it made him feel it almost twice as much. He was extremely grateful for the way he could trust her. He gave her a tight squeeze before making his way up to his bed. He pulled his curtain shut. Ron was already snoring loudly. Harry peeled his tshirt over his head and let it hit the floor. He sat in bed and draped the thin blanket over his legs and feet before falling back onto the pillow. He took off his glasses and laid them next to his wand on the bedside table, then he laid his hands on his bare stomach. He reflected on his day, and his mind kept drawing back to Draco. His breath had caught when he saw him strolling to his seat on the train. His blond hair had been trimmed to frame his face, and his tailored robes were buttoned over his proud chest. He thought about seeing him so animated at dinner today... He felt a tightness in his chest. Draco had given him a chance in their first year. Harry shook the thought, he knew he was being ridiculous. It had just been a long time since he'd seen someone attractive, and Draco was attractive... His mind wandered, and he felt the tightness move to his stomach. He rolled over and pulled the blanket up before it could travel any more southward. He wrapped his arms around himself and tried to clear his head, but Harry was familiar with this feeling... Deep in him, he knew that this was the beginning of an addiction.
"Look who's got her eye on you, Harry," she sing-songed and discreetly pointed to Ginny Weasley who was being chatted up by Dean. She looked bored with him, and her eyes found Harry's. She smiled shyly at Harry, tucking a strand of red behind her ear. His smile in response was watered down. He looked back at Hermione and drew a breath. She scooted off of him.
"Er, I guess it's 'bout time I let you on, then," he began, and Hermione gave him a confused look. "I'm gay." His voice was barely over a whisper.
"What?" she leaned close to him and he mumbled the two words again. "Harry, I really can't hear you," she said. He sighed and put both his wrists on the table, as if to steady himself.
"I like blokes," he said calmly, only where she could hear. He looked around quickly to make sure no one had been eavesdropping. Hermione's eyes got wide right before her face opened up into a grin.
"Well, that's just-" she was excited, but Harry cut her off.
"Don't go shouting about it. No one else knows." He could tell his face fell, and he hoped she hadn't noticed. Only one other person had known. She must not have because she pretended to lock her lips and she winked at him. It brought a smile back to his face.
"So, what classes are you taking this year?" she changed the subject. Ron looked over, mouth stuffed full of the ham that formerly occupied his plate.
"Haven't you got anything better to talk about, 'Mione?" His tone was jovial, but she still rolled her eyes at him anyway.
"Well, Ronald, some of us are here to learn." Harry's impression of her was spot on, and the two boys burst out laughing. Hermione laughed a little herself, then shook her head muttering,
"Boys..." Harry didn't have room for dessert, so he just talked with Seamus, Hermione, and Ron. He caught sight of Draco laughing with his new friend and a few old ones. Harry's stomach flipped. Long after the conversation had turned to Quidditch, Ron looked over at Hermione.
"'Mione, how do you know your classes when schedules don't get passed out 'til the morning?" he mumbled the question around a biscuit, and had three more in his hand.
"Never you mind," she said. Harry ignored it, she was always exponentially more prepared than he was so the fact that she knew ahead of time didn't even phase him.
***
That night, they were piled in the common room. The girls were on the couch, and a few of the boys were gathered on the floor in front of the unlit hearth. Harry, Ron, Seamus, Neville, and a few first years were talking about their summers. Ron didn't have much to tell, Seamus got a new broom, some of the first years talked about their confusion in Diagon Alley and it made the older boys smile warmly. Neville happily announced that he decided that he was going to tech Herbology. After everyone was through congratulating him, everyone's eyes fell on Harry. He cleared his throat even and it still felt tight. "I didn't do much at all," he finally said. He let out a relieved sigh, for a moment he thought his secret would shoot out of his mouth, but he wasn't ready.
"Well, Merlin, you're a right boring git, aren't you?" Seamus jeered, and the group of boys erupted in laughter. Harry's mood lifted immediately. He and Ron taught a first year called Miles Helms how to levitate small things, and Neville animatedly explained something about a plant that had tried to attack him in its old age. The whole room felt happier than Harry could ever remember it feeling. After some time, they decided it was time to head to bed. A few of the guys called a halfhearted 'Gnight' to Hermione who was now alone on the couch, reading. Harry stayed behind to talk to her, and he was standing by the arm of the couch. She jabbed him in the ribs with her elbow, and he looked down, offended. He didn't say anything, though, when he noticed she was pointing. Seamus' shirt was pulled up almost halfway in the back, showing off his pale back, those two dimples that drew Harry's eyes downward to his small, but kinda cute butt. Harry couldn't appreciate the view. He could never see Seamus that way, with anyone come to think of it.
"Come off it," Harry said, smiling. Hermione was still chuckling to herself. "Thank you, Hermione." Saying it made him feel it almost twice as much. He was extremely grateful for the way he could trust her. He gave her a tight squeeze before making his way up to his bed. He pulled his curtain shut. Ron was already snoring loudly. Harry peeled his tshirt over his head and let it hit the floor. He sat in bed and draped the thin blanket over his legs and feet before falling back onto the pillow. He took off his glasses and laid them next to his wand on the bedside table, then he laid his hands on his bare stomach. He reflected on his day, and his mind kept drawing back to Draco. His breath had caught when he saw him strolling to his seat on the train. His blond hair had been trimmed to frame his face, and his tailored robes were buttoned over his proud chest. He thought about seeing him so animated at dinner today... He felt a tightness in his chest. Draco had given him a chance in their first year. Harry shook the thought, he knew he was being ridiculous. It had just been a long time since he'd seen someone attractive, and Draco was attractive... His mind wandered, and he felt the tightness move to his stomach. He rolled over and pulled the blanket up before it could travel any more southward. He wrapped his arms around himself and tried to clear his head, but Harry was familiar with this feeling... Deep in him, he knew that this was the beginning of an addiction.