Lost, Then Found

Kim’s P.O.V.

Getting used to a new born baby in the house is difficult; getting used to a new born baby who is colicky is challenging. The loss of sleep as a new mother is expected, but it’d been a couple weeks and I’ve somehow only been running on 20hrs of sleep total.

Jared helps out as much as he can between patrols or pack meetings to discuss the inevitable face-off between the Cullen’s and the Volturi; but it isn’t enough. When he couldn’t be around he went as far as to ask Emily to babysit for a couple of hours so I could get some sleep. As grateful as I should be for his efforts, I wasn’t. I don’t know if it was from the lack of sleep or just being fed up with his bullshit, but all I wanted to do was wring his fucking neck.

Every night it was the same thing, Embry would stop by to check on Naira and Jared wouldn’t allow it. Between their fighting, Naira’s screaming, and the loss of sleep, I was a ticking time bomb ready to explode at any minute. Tonight it was no different; I was slouched over Naira’s crib trying to find some way to soothe her while Jared and Embry were out front arguing.

“I didn’t ask for this to happen; you know I have no control over this”, Embry pleaded. I could hear the desperation in his voice knowing it was caused by having to hear Naira screaming bloody murder in here while he was out there not being able to calm her down, even though he knew I was doing everything I could.

“Go home Embry, I’m not doing this tonight”, Jared warned.

“You’re angry and I get that, so if you want to fight I’m right here. I can handle a few broken bones, but what I can’t handle is not being able to be a part of Naira’s life”.

I knew better than to think Jared’s silence at Embry’s last comment should be taken as a good sign. My anger had finally reached its peak, so I wrapped Naira up in her pink blanket that Jacob made her and carried her with me to the front of the house and out onto the porch. Jared was shaking; he was seconds away from being replaced by a huge brown wolf until I walked over to Embry and placed Naira into his awaiting arms. Jared took two large steps forward; the only thing separating him from Embry was my small frame standing between them.

“What are you going to do; you plan on fighting him while he’s holding your daughter”? I said while attempting to push him back, but coming up unsuccessful.

His gaze was locked on Embry holding Naira as he spoke to me, “Kim take Naira back in the house, I’m too tired”…..

“Tired of what Jared”? I snapped, “Tired of trying to control something that can’t be controlled, because you sure as hell can’t be tired from being hunched over a crib trying to calm down a screaming baby that won’t stop no matter what you do. I’m tired Jared; physically, mentally, and emotionally.” I paused, letting out a sigh of exhaustion before continuing, “I-I-I can’t do this anymore; I need help. It’s only been a couple of weeks and I’m completely drained”. His eyes finally broke from the intense glare between him and Embry and shifted to meet mine; they were apologetic and filled with remorse.

I took full advantage of the silence, giving me time to gather my thoughts before attempting to sway Jared. That’s when I fully noticed it; it was silent. I peeked over my shoulder and saw Naira fast asleep cradled in Embry’s arms. I turned to face Jared once again, keeping my voice soft as I spoke, “this thing between you and Embry needs to end, please Jared”.

For a moment I thought I actually got through to him, but the man is stubborn. He returned to the house, but not before giving Embry “the look”. I could only hope he’d consider what I’d suggested. The two of them being at each other’s throats won’t do any good tomorrow when the Volturi are supposed to arrive, according to the future seeing leech. Jared can’t stand to be in the same room as Embry, what would it be like while phased? I was worried about Jared not having his head in the game when it came down to it.

“Thanks for letting me see her” Embry said.

“Huh?.... Oh, Yeah, no problem”, I replied.

“Are you alright”?

“I need to talk to Jared, do you mind watching Naira for a while”?

Embry’s eyes beamed, “Of course”!

I nodded, “Um, there’s formula in the kitchen if she wakes up and is hungry. The diapers and wipes are in her room on the changing table”.

“Got it”, he smiled.

“Thanks Em”.

I found Jared in our bedroom sprawled out on the bed, an arm placed over his face covering his eyes. I stood there for a minute not knowing if he was asleep or not, even if he was I debated on whether or not he should be woken up. I didn’t have to come to a conclusion; he sensed my presence and took the initiative to speak first, “have you come for round two of telling me how bad of a father I am”?

I wasted no time in closing the distance between him and myself, “Jared I never said you were a bad father”.

He moved his arm away from his eyes and peered up at me as I climbed into bed next to him. “Really, because that’s what it sounded like you were insinuating. You pretty much said that you thought I don’t do enough around here for Naira” he fumed.

I placed a hand on his chest trying to find a way to calm him when the fact of the matter was he had every right to be mad. Sure he had his own list of wrongs in the situation, but I pretty much belittled his position as Naira’s father, and I did so in front of one of his pack brothers. “You’re right, and I’m sorry. I want you to know that I didn’t mean what I said out there”. He rolled his eyes before placing his arm back in its original position. “Seriously” I begged, “I said those things out of anger. All the stress and lack of sleep has gotten to me, and the tension between you and Embry has gotten out of hand. Baby I need you two on the same team, not biting each other’s head off every time you’re in the same room”.

I waited patiently for him to say something, anything at all, but he didn’t. I wouldn’t accept his silence, this time I would not give him the option to brush off my concerns. I curled my fingers around his arm that he had placed over his eyes and gently moved it away so I could see the beautiful brown eyes that made me weak every time I looked directly into them. He had tears forming within them, and my heart sank the moment one rolled down the side of his face. This was a side of Jared I’d never seen before. “Talk to me Jared” I whispered. I used my thumb to softly wipe away the rest of the tears before they had the chance to make the journey down the side of his face.

“I”… He cleared his throat, attempting to restore his masculinity. “Before she was even born I told you I wanted to protect her from this life. I was willing to go to great lengths to keep all this supernatural shit hidden from her, but Embry imprinting on here through her right in the middle. I wanted her to go to college, get a great job, but most of all have the option to move away from here if she wanted to; but she’s been robbed of her free will”.

My face scrunched up in confusion, “how can you even look at it that way, you of all people should know that’s not true”.

“How can you not? You should know better than anyone the effects of imprinting”.

I nodded and let a few minutes of silence pass between us. “Jared if I wanted to leave here and go back to New York would you let me”?

Jared shot up to a sitting position and there was a sense of panic that permeated his features. His eyes were wide as they searched for answers, “why are you asking me that”?

“Just answer the question”.

He hesitated, taking a moment or two to come up with his answer. “It’d hurt like hell, and I wouldn’t give up easily but” he sighed, “if leaving here would bring you happiness than my answer is yes”.

“Exactly” I exclaimed. “Naira hasn’t been robbed of her free will, her options are wide open. No matter what she chooses to do when the time comes Embry will support her 100% because he wants to see her happy”.

I cupped his face with my hands and stared deeply into his eyes hoping these final words would get through to him, “I know you’d like to shield her from all this, but wouldn’t that be considered robbing her of her free will”?

For the first time in a long time a grin appeared on his face, “I hate when you’re right” he muttered.
I relaxed as the tension began to dissipate. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him in for a much needed kiss. “It doesn’t happen very often so let me enjoy this” I giggled, pushing him back down on the bed as I continued to pepper him with kisses.

“So where’s Naira”? He questioned.

“Embry’s watching her for a while” I reported.

“Hmmm… That gives a few hours alone, are you thinking what I’m thinking”? He asked wiggling his eyebrows.

“Sleep”?

“Exactly”! He laughed.

Jared’s P.O.V.

From the minute I got up this morning I had this uneasy feeling. The forest was eerily silent, the only sound coming from the thud of my paws. The breeze stilled, but there was a chill in the air that made my fur stand straight up, that’s when I smelled it. There was a familiar scent in the air; but I couldn’t remember where I might have come into contact with it. I don’t know who or what it may have belonged to; all I know is it had me on edge.

“Don’t worry about it man, it’s probably just coming from a tourist who passed by earlier”, Quil thought.

“Tourists this far out into the forest is unlikely”.

“Could be one of the pale faces from town”, Paul added.

“Naw, I don’t think so”.

“You’re just worried about leaving Kim and Naira”, Leah phased in.

“The imprints will be fine, I got one of the pups near them in case there’s trouble” Jacob assured, but it wasn’t enough to calm my nerves.

“Maybe we should swing by and do a perimeter run around the house” Embry suggested.

“There’s no time” Jacob barked.

“Yea, let’s just get this over with” Paul added.
It was easy for them to be this calm. Their imprints were safe and sound; Shianne was at work surrounded by tons of people. As for Rachel she was off visiting her sister Rebecca. Meanwhile Quil, Embry, Sam, Leah, and I are stuck worrying about our imprints alone in the little cottage on the edge of the Rez.

“If that’s what you believe you’re sadly mistaken. Focus on the task at hand so we can get back to our loved ones sooner rather than later”.

Kim’s P.O.V.

I had just finished putting Naira down for her nap when I heard the front door creak open. “Jared, is that you” I asked, right after closing the door to Naira’s room?

“SURPRISE”! Claire shouted, nearly giving me a heart attack.

“Oh Claire, you scared me”. I said, holding my hand to my chest. I could feel the rapid beating of my heart.

She giggled; completely satisfied with the fact that she’d scared the crap out of me. “Emily and I came over to visit you and Naira so you wouldn’t be all alone”.

“That’s very sweet of you”. I replied, even though company was the last thing I wanted at the moment. “Where is Emily”? I asked.

“She’s getting Mika’s stuff out of the truck. So, where’s baby Naira; can I play with her”?

“Maybe a little later, I finally got her to take a nap. How about a movie until she wakes up”? I suggested.

Claire clapped her hands and jumped up and down with excitement. The kid really needed to get out more if she thought watching a movie was exciting. “Yeah”! She started running down the hall to the guest bedroom, “Do you need some help”? Claire stopped at the door, placed a hand on her hips, “No, I’m a big girl now”, she scoffed.

A couple minutes later a frazzled Emily came through the door. She was struggling trying to keep everything in her grasp. “Need some help”? I asked. She nodded with a smile.

“So, did Jared put you up to this little visit”? I asked, taking the over-packed diaper bag from her.

She let out a hushed laugh, careful not to wake Mika who had fallen asleep on the ride over. “Actually Sam did, but Jared didn’t object to the idea”, she answered.

“Of course he didn’t”, I mumbled to myself.

While Emily quietly set up Mika’s pack and play pen in Naira’s room I fixed us some tea. I found myself frequently checking the time, wondering if the clock was even working. Time couldn’t have passed any slower. My thoughts drifted to Jared and the pack, wondering what was happening, were they ok, and when would they be home?

“The kids are sound asleep”, Emily said, taking a seat at the kitchen table. “Are you alright, you seem a little spaced out”?

I took a seat across the table from Emily and passed her a cup of tea, “Yea, I’m just worried about the guys”, I answered.

She nodded, “Ah. They’ll be fine”, she replied knowingly.

“How are you able to remain so calm about this”?

“Well, I try to keep myself busy so I don’t think about it; plus I have faith in the pack. Don’t worry; Jacob will make sure they all make it home”.

You got to be kidding me, “If Jacob would grow a pair when it comes to Bella, the pack wouldn’t be in this mess. Sam should still be Alpha, this would have never happened under his command”, I whispered the last part.

“You don’t mean that, you’re just angry with Jacob right now but it will pass”.

I sighed, “Can we talk about something else”?

“How about we fix up something to eat for the guys, you know they’ll be hungry when they get home”.

“Sure, sure”, I replied dismissively.

Emily began going through the refrigerator and cabinets looking for something to cook, while I sat there lost in my own little world. “Kim, your refrigerator is bare”, she exclaimed.

I shrugged, “I haven’t had the chance to get to the store”.

“I’ll just quick run into town and pick up a few things. I’ll take Claire with me, but do you mind if I leave Mika with you, I’d hate to wake him up”?

“That’s fine”.

After doing the dishes and straightening up the house, I ran out of things to clean to keep me from obsessing over the pack’s well-being. I decided to sneak in and check on the kids. The music from Naira’s mobile was softly playing, but the kids were still sound asleep. I stood in the door way for a moment or two smiling at the sight of my daughter, until I heard a few knocks on the front door. I silently closed the door to Naira’s room and proceeded down the hall to the living room wondering why Emily just didn’t come right in.

“Did you forget something”? I began to ask as I swung the door open; expecting to find Emily on the other side, but it wasn’t her. Instead, I was met by a pair of black eyes. As he stared at me a sinister grin appeared on his face, sending a chill down my spine. My words were caught in my throat; I was paralyzed by both fear and complete shock at the fact that my worst nightmare had come true; he found me.