Rush

Here we go again. A new city. A new life. A new identity. The feeling was all so familiar. It was time for Jamie and I to start something new. And where else better to start a new life than in New York City?

But something about this city was different. In New York City, no one cared who you were, no one cared where you came from, and no one cared who you wanted to be. Maybe that's what I needed. I needed people to not care about me.

In New York City, when you're walking down the street along the sidewalk, everyone keeps to themselves. They don't even bother to look at you. They don't wander what you're story is. To them, you're just another stranger that they don't care about.

My entire life has been filled with the worry and the paranoia that someone out there knows what I'm up to. I've never been safe. I have secrets just like everyone else, but I am most certainly not ordinary.

What was ordinary anyways? Because, to me, it just means you're just like everyone else. That thought itself, scares the shit out of me. I wanted to be myself, but sadly, that's wasn't going to cut it.

Jamie and I, have lived a different life every month. I haven't always been Reagan Wells. In fact, I’ve been Ashley, Emily, Danielle, Karlie, Kaitlyn, Alexa, and Brittany. Those are only some of my past pseudonyms! As silly as it may seem, I made myself a list to keep track of the name I’ve either had or that I was going to have. Jamie always made fun of me every time I pulled out the gross folded up napkin that I kept in my back pocket once it was time for a new adventure.

“Time to see who the lucky winner this month was,” I reached into my back pocket as Jamie and I adjusted ourselves into the back of the taxicab that reeked of smoke. “Drumroll please,” I winked at Jamie. She rolled her eyes playfully at me slapping her thighs repeatedly. I unfolded the fragile piece of paper and glanced at the list of names. Back in Florida, I was Ashley. But in New York I was, “Hazel Grace.”

“You really put that name on there? Everyone is going to know it’s fake,” Jamie muttered as she rested her arm against the window.

I ignored that fact though. I remembered writing the list and, most importantly, I remember writing that name. It was my favorite name on the list and, to tell the truth, I had been waiting for the moment to tell people that my name was Hazel Grace. Funny thing it is, to actually like who I am.

That’s how our relationship was, Jamie was always finding some way to pick on me no matter what it was. It usually ranged from the way I tied my shoes to how I was acting. She may be older than I am, but that doesn’t mean she can’t be annoying sometimes. But, who knows, maybe that’s just the sister rivalry talking.

The thing is, I am tired of being treated as the “younger” sibling. I’m twenty-one! I am a full-grown adult and I know how to take care of myself. My sister was all I had though. The thought of never having her there by my side scared me shitless.

“I can’t believe we are here,” Jamie grinned, as she admired the bright lights of the city.

“The city that never sleeps. Can you believe how crowded the streets are even at two in the morning? It’s so beautiful at night.” I laughed, noticing the amount of people that walked along the sidewalks. I truly was a city girl at heart.

Suddenly, our cab turned the corner onto skid row. Bums sleeping in the corner next to the old pawn shops. There was one chinese restaurant that had a foreclosure sign on the front door.

“Okay, I guess I take that back,” I frowned. “Please tell me this is just a short cut.”

“I hate to break it to you, honey, but I kind of wanted to save money for food and other stuff to get by. So I didn’t exactly get a five-star hotel. But hey, it’s only a bed. We won’t be spending that much time in there anyways,” Jamie winked.

The taxi driver looked in the rearview mirror with a smirk on his face.

“Keep driving, you pervert,” Jamie leaned forward shouting at him.

The driver pulled up to the crappy looking hotel in no time. Unfortunately, the area around it didn’t look so friendly either. It’s only a bed, I reminded myself. Jamie and I grabbed our suitcases from the trunk and quickly made our way inside. I immediately regretted the outfit I chose to wear. I expected us to be checking into a luxurious hotel so, of course, I wore a cute red top, black skinny jeans, and tall heels. I probably could’ve just worn leggings and a sweatshirt. Damn it, Jamie.

We walked up to the front desk where an old man sat behind reading an old book. He didn’t even bother to look up. “Ahem,” Jamie cleared her throat trying to grab the man’s attention. He jumped up glancing at us both. “I’m here to check in.”

“Name?” He grunted going through his book of clients. I couldn’t help but notice how very few names were there. I’m assuming he didn’t get a lot of people staying in his hotel.

“Spencer.” Julie said. “Spencer Fox.”

I nodded winking at her. Good choice. It was a big improvement than the last name she had in Florida: Angel. And she said my name was fake?

“Here are your keys. Your room is on the second floor. Room 203.” He set the keys on the front desk and went back to reading his book. Jamie and I exchanged classes noticing how weird the guy was. We headed up the stairs to the second floor and walked into our room.

“Oh God,” the revolting smell of the room met my nostrils and I immediately covered my nose. “I am convinced that someone was murdered in this room.”

“I wouldn’t doubt it,” Jamie agreed. “Remember though, it is just-”

“It’s just a bed. Right,” I scoffed and set my suitcase on the side of my bed. I sat down on the mattress, hearing the loud squeak of the the springs underneath. “Oh, I’m going to sleep just great here. Thanks for choosing the crappiest hotel ever, sis.”

“Don’t worry, by the end of the week, I’ll find a very rich and successful business man and then we will have a nice bed,” Jamie sat on the bed across from me. I removed my high heels and grabbed a pair of sweats from my suitcase. Jamie did the same.

“Let’s hope so,” I muttered under my breath.

“Oh come on! At least enjoy yourself Hazel Grace. You are in New York City!!”

She did have a point there. I was in New York City. The city of my dreams! And I was complaining!! It was time I let loose and enjoy myself this time. If I was going to spend the next month in New York, I might as well make it the time of my life. So that’s exactly what I was going to do. I am not Reagan Wells anymore.

I am Hazel Grace.