Nightingale

"What the fuck is going on here?"

I groaned as I shifted in the bed, feeling the sheets that weren't mine. Next to me, John moved. He let out a grunt and then I felt him jolt up.

"Lennon, it's not-"

"What it looks like?" she finished, her voice angry.

I sat up also, looking at her with a frown. "Lennon, it really isn't." As I spoke, I carefully looked around the room, then silent praised that we had both gotten dressed again after last night. "Don't make this more than it is."

"More than it is?" I could tell she was livid. "Let's see how Joel takes this, hm?"

John stood up, moving towards her as she started doing something on her phone. "Len, stop it."

She held her hand up at him and put her phone to her ear. She announced that it was ringing. I put my hand to my head briefly, then crawled out of the bed.

"Joel? It's Lennon. I just got back to my apartment and I found your girlfriend here." She paused, listening to him. "Oh...she told you she was staying here?" Her smug expressed fell. "They were in the same bed, Joel."

That smirk reappeared. I started to gather all my things, not wanting to listen anymore. I heard her say goodbye and then she walked to the living room. "I can't believe you did that, Lennon. That was uncalled for."

"What's uncalled for, is you sleeping in the same bed as your ex girlfriend, the girl you're clearly still in love with," she snapped. Her gaze transferred to me. "Joel wants you home. Have fun, Savannah."

I rolled my eyes. "I'll be back tomorrow for Ellie."

"I'll walk you out," John said, following me out the front door.

We walked down together and I instantly began to cry. This was the last thing I wanted. I never wanted Joel to find out.

"Baby, it'll be okay," John whispered. "I'll stay away from you. You guys can work it out. Joel loves you."

I nodded as he pulled me into his embrace. We stayed like that for a minute and then he stepped away. "It has to be just for Ellie. We can only see each other when it concerns her." John was sad and I knew he didn't want to agree, but he nodded anyways. "Please remember that I do love you. I'll always love you. Forever, John."

"I'll always love you, also, Savannah. You're the only one who will ever have my heart. Goodbye, baby."

"Goodbye," I murmured. He bent down, pushing his lips to mine one final time.

When we pulled away, I couldn't look at him again or I knew I would cry more. I got in my car, back out of my parking spot, and started my drive back to my apartment.

Once there, I quietly went to my apartment. Inside sat Joel, waiting for me. He was on the couch, his head in his hands.

"Tell me nothing happened," he said. "Tell me that you love me and you don't love John and that nothing happened."

I stepped towards him, willing myself to not cry. "I love you, Joel. Nothing happened. You know Lennon, she over reacts about everything."

He finally looked at me, his eyes boring into mine with an intensity I had never felt from him. "Is John out of your system?" he asked. "For good?" I nodded. "Okay." The way he said it, I knew he knew. He knew the truth about everything but didn't want to accept it or believe it.

The way he was looking at me, he knew all the shame I had. He knew every single dirty detail and he blocked it from his mind. He didn't want to believe it, even though he knew that he knew the truth.

"I love you, Joel," I repeated.

He stood up, then closed the distance between us. "I love you, too, Sav." He kissed me. "There's a party at Tim's tonight. Do you want to go? It's just a small one, just with the group."

"Yeah, that sounds nice," I said.

He smiled and grabbed my hand. "Let's shower."

~

When we pulled up to the party, the first thing I saw was John's car. Out of the corner of my eye, I glanced at Joel, who ignored it. He parked across from the car like it was nothing and then smiled at me. He had been acting normal again, like everything was fine. I knew it was only a matter of time before he blew up, though.

Inside, the main group was there. The Maine boys, This Century boys, the crew, and Eric was there, along with my little daughter. She was in the pool with Eric, splashing with him.

"Momma, look!" she said as she sat on top of Eric's shoulders.

I smiled at them, hearing Joel laugh next to me. "Look at you, baby! Be careful though and listen to Uncle Eric."

Joel pulled us over to Kennedy and Jared, with Tessa on Jared's lap. "Your daughter is the biggest heart breaker. All these tattooed band guys are wrapped around her little finger," Tessa laughed.

Joel pulled me into his lap as I smiled at Tessa. "She must've learned it from her mother," Joel replied. I pursed my lips together, ignoring the stab at me. Jared and Tessa thought he was joking, but I knew better, and by the look on Kennedy's face, so did he.

"Wanna go get a drink with me, Sav?" Kennedy asked.

I nodded and stood from Joel's lap. He patted my bum lightly and pulled me down for a kiss. At first, I wondered why he did that, but when I looked up, John was staring at us. Joel did it to mark his territory.

Kennedy and I went inside, going to the counter with all the liquor. "John told me everything, Sav," he finally admitted. "He came over earlier, saying he and Lennon broke up. He broke down and told me it all."

"Oh god Ken, you must think I'm a whore," I groaned.

He smiled and wrapped an arm around my waist in a hug. "Never. I would never think that. You and John have always been... you and John. We all know that. I'm not mad or angry or thinking bad things about you. I love you, Savannah, I never could."

"Why did they break up?" I asked.

Kennedy handed me the bottle of Jack Daniels. "He broke up with her because he told her what she did was unnecessary and a bitch move. She freaked out and threw a tantrum. He kicked her up and said to not come back. He loves you, so much. You and Noella are everything to him."

"I know and I love him but I can't be with him, Ken. I just can't. We aren't good together. It's doomed. I need someone like Joel. With John, it's just sex and fighting and drinking. We can't do that when we have a daughter now. The circumstances are different than they were five years ago."

Nodding, he agreed with me. "You're right. I think you made the right choice, I really do. I am behind you one hundred percent." I smiled and thanked him. "Alright, let's go soak up the tension out there because of your two boys."

Eventually, almost everyone got in the pool. Joel and I didn't because we didn't bring bathing suits and neither did Kennedy or Tessa.

The four of us sat by the fire pit talking about the future and what we wanted to do. Joel kept talking about us and what we were going to do, always using plural nouns instead of singular.

Tessa and Kennedy got up, going to get drinks for themselves and refills for others in the pool. Joel and I stayed. My head had been resting on his shoulder, but he shifted, putting his hand in his pocket.

"I'm sorry about what I said earlier... The learning from her mother comment. It was rude and I'm sorry, baby," he apologized, taking my hand.

He pulled his other hand out of his pocket and began fiddling with my fingers. "It's okay," I assured.

"I love you, Savannah Renee. You mean the world to me and I want to be with you forever. Everything past what happened with John and with us. I want us to be a family, you, me and Noella. I want to be your husband and I want to be the luckiest man in the world and call you my wife. I will always love you." He showed my hand to me and I gasped, using my other hand to cover my mouth. A diamond ring was placed there. There was a princess cut diamond with four smaller ones, two on either side of the big one. It was truly beautiful. "Marry me, Savannah."

"Oh my god, Joel," I gasped. Tears formed in my eyes as I looked up at him. He was smiling and I nodded. "Yes, of course. Yes. I'll marry you. Yes, Joel."

His smiled turned into a grin and he kissed me. I pulled back and he pulled me into him. When I looked up, everyone was looking at us, but all I saw was John.

And I swear, I saw his heart break and his world fall apart.