My Forever Girl

Naira’s P.O.V.

I was woken up the next morning by an obnoxiously loud beeping coming from outside my bedroom door. My heart began to pound in my chest as I jumped from my bed; finally realizing what the sound was. As I rushed down the hallway the air became hazy, and the smell was almost unbearable. When I entered the kitchen I was relieved to see that the house wasn’t on fire, it was just my father’s horrible cooking.

He turned around as soon as he heard me giggle, “Do you need some help”, I asked. My dad was capable of doing some pretty amazing things such as morphing into the world’s biggest wolf and taking down these almost invincible creatures, but he couldn’t even make toast if his life depended on it.

“Would you mind? I suck at this”, he replied, with a small grin.

I began scraping the…well, whatever he was trying to make into the garbage. After washing and drying the pan I poured some pancake batter into the pan and watched it bubble.

“So where’s mom”, I asked, flipping over the first pancake.

He took his seat at the head of the kitchen table, “She went to Port Angeles with Shianne. She said something about “big sales after the Holiday’s”, who knows when they’ll be back”, he finished with a shrug of the shoulders.

It still felt a little awkward being around my dad. I knew he had forgiven me, but there was still a hint of disappoint lingering. He tried to hide it by pretending like nothing ever happened, but I could see it in his eyes. I only hoped that with time that disappointment would disappear completely and be replaced with pride.

I placed a plate full of pancakes in front of him, and took a seat at the table with a plate of my own. The room fell silent as we ate, but when dad finished before me he decided to try to start a conversation, “So um”, he cleared his throat before continuing, “I heard you went to go see Embry last night”.

I nodded yes as I shoved another fork full of pancakes into my mouth.

“How’d that go”, he asked, looking at anything but me. He looked just as uncomfortable as I was feeling.

I really didn’t want to have this conversation with my father; someone who shared a mind with Embry when wolfed out. Wait a minute, suddenly a light bulb went off above my head; the pack mind! I’m almost positive that he would know what was going on; why Mika, Quil, and Jacob kept expressing “how much” Embry has on his plate, but never going into any further details. I didn’t want to use my dad, but I felt like something was definitely up, and it was going to drive me crazy until I knew exactly what.

“Not much was said”, I finally answered. “He wasn’t there when I arrived, so I got to visit with Ms. Call for a while”, I mentioned.

“Oh”, he said, glancing out the window.

“Yeah, she let me in to wait for him”, I continued, studying his face, “she didn’t even know who I was right away”.

He shrugged his shoulders, “She hasn’t seen you in a long time”, he answered, running a hand threw his hair.

“Yeah”, I paused. I could see the movement of his chest as he silently let out a puff of air. ”After I told her who I was she seemed happy to see me”.

He smiled warmly, “I’m sure she was; you spent a lot of time over there as a kid”.

I let a few moments slip by, but when he didn’t say anything else I giggled, “You know, I found her reading glasses in the strangest place. I was heating up food for Embry and I found them in the microwave”.

He shuffled uncomfortably in his chair, “Yeah that is strange”, he said, not offering anything else.

“Yeah”, I replied in agreement. “She also kept calling me Claire”, I added.

He rubbed the back of his neck, “Well, ugh.. Claire goes over there with Quil a lot”. He glanced at the clock again and stood from the table, “I wish I could talk some more, but I’m supposed to meet up with Quil for patrol”. He placed a kiss on top of my head.

“Oh, no problem; tell Quil I said hi”, I replied nonchalantly.

He quickly waved goodbye and was out the door. I began the dishes, and then cleaned the rest of the house before Mika came over; he wanted me to help him figure out what he’d need for school. I needed to do something to keep my mind off of everyone’s weirdness. I don’t know, maybe it was me; maybe I was just reading way too much into stuff.

“Yo Naira, time to come back to planet Earth”, Mika shouted.

I was definitely overthinking things. I didn’t even notice Mika come in, “Oh sorry! I got a lot on my mind”.

“I can see that”, he chuckled, “what were you thinking about”?

“Nothing… Just daydreaming”, I lied. There was no use in bringing it up; I’d just make myself seem paranoid. “So, are you excited for school”, I asked, moving away from the previous conversation.

“Hell yeah”, he shouted. I wish I would have had his enthusiasm when I enrolled. “I’ll finally live a normal life with normal people”.

“I thought you were proud of who you are and where you came from”, I questioned.

He rolled his eyes in response to the smug look I had on my face as I mocked him. “I am proud”, he said firmly, “It’s just that I want more than this. I just want to be able to go out and have fun without the worry of listening for howls signaling they need me back home. I wouldn’t expect you to know anything about that kind of responsibility”, he joked.

I had nothing to say to that. He may have meant it to be a joke, but he was right, I didn’t know that kind of responsibility. My only job as an imprint was to be there for my wolf, and I couldn’t even handle that.
Mika hadn’t even been a wolf that long and was already unhappy with his title of a “protector”. It made me think about what the rest of the pack went/are going through. This opened my eyes to a new found respect and appreciation for all of them; something I should have showed right from the moment I learned the truth. They have all sacrificed so much to protect us.

“Naira, you’re spacin’ out again”, Mika called, interrupting my thoughts.

I pulled out the laptop and went on the school website; making a list of things he would most likely need. I showed him how he would get on the virtual library to order his books once he got the list of ones he’d need.

“Embry said thanks for the Christmas present”, Mika randomly mentioned.

The wind was knocked out of me, just by hearing his name, “You talked to him”?

He nodded, “Yeah, before I came here”.

“Did he say anything else”, my voice squeaked with excitement. I suddenly felt like a little school girl again, asking about her crush.

“Nope; he just said to tell you thanks”.

My excitement faded and I was back at square one. “He could have told me that himself”, I replied, disappointed.

Mika left that comment alone. He chose to remain quiet, so I took it as that conversation was over. Mika began packing up his things as I shut down the laptop and placed it back into my room.
I was surprised by Mika’s outburst when I came back into the room, “Can you blame him for not wanting to see you? Why should he let you back in; you’re just going to hurt him again”?
I was suddenly confused. I thought Mika and I were past this, “I already told you I have no intention of hurting Embry”.

“Really Naira, what about your boy toy; have you broken up with him yet”?

Once again, where was this coming from? “That’s not something I really want to do over the phone”.
He chuckled sarcastically, “whatever Naira”.

Let it go Naira; choose your battles wisely. I took a deep breath and let it out slowly, mission “Don’t let others get under your skin” was in effect.

“Ok Mika; it was nice seeing you”, I replied. So much for that mended relationship.

***********************************************

My fingers nervously pushed the numbers to dial Jayden’s number. This was it; I couldn’t let this continue especially if I knew there would be no future for us. The twisting in my stomach returned, the same feeling I got 20 minutes ago when I first tried to end this. My finger hesitantly hovered over the call button, “just do it already”, I said to myself between gritted teeth. I sucked in a deep breath and pushed the button. I didn’t even realize I was still holding my breath until the moment his voicemail picked up and I finally let it out. The twisting in my gut subsided for now, only until I would either have to try again or he would return the call. I placed the phone on the night stand and climbed into bed where I finally drifted off to sleep.

My mother gently placed me on a blanket she had laid on the grass. That is where I watched my mother enter a shed, returning several seconds later with a gas can in one hand and a box of matches in the other. My eyes filled with tears as I watched the little cottage go up in flames right before my eyes, my mother or father nowhere in sight.

Relief swept through me the moment I saw her run through the door, but as she got closer I was horrified by what I saw. My mother was covered in blood.

It was only a dream; I assured myself as I tried to get my heart rate under control. It was one of those types of nightmares that you knew was a dream, but it still felt so real. Remembering the details of the dream gave me chills; the fire, the blood curdling screams coming from inside, and my mother covered in blood. Who’s blood? I rolled my eyes; what was the point of wondering, it was just a bad dream. The dream alone should have made me laugh; my mom wasn’t capable of hurting anyone.

I turned towards the clock to see it was only 3:30 in the morning. Taking in a deep breath I turned around once again in an attempt to go back to sleep, but was scared half to death when I saw a silhouette of an owl sitting on my windowsill.

Its eyes were so human like; a deep hazel that seemed to glow in night. The longer I looked at it the more goosebumps appeared on my arms. As crazy as it sounds, the thing looked so familiar. I had a feeling like I knew it, or seen it before. This is crazy, I thought to myself as I rubbed a hand over my face. When I looked back at the window the owl was gone. I was beginning to wonder if I had even seen it there in the first place.

Unable to get back to sleep, I decided to go for a little walk. I pulled on a sweatshirt and some sweatpants and quietly made my way down the hall and out the front door. The night was eerily still; something made me hesitate before entering the woods to travel the path to the beach. I couldn’t get over this feeling that I was being watched.

A snap of a twig stopped me in my tracks. The only thing I could hear was the racing of my own heart. I nearly screamed at the top of my lungs when to glowing eyes peered through the brush to my right.

Relief swept through me the moment the huge sandy colored wolf stepped into view, “Jesus Seth, you nearly gave me a heart attack”.

Yip yip, he whined as he lowered his head to my hand. I ran a hand through his thick fur, “I’m just going for a little walk down to the beach; I can’t sleep”.

Seth huffed, blowing a puff of air that was visible in the cold night. I clearly didn’t have his approval, but he nudged my hand before retreating back into the darkness of the woods. I felt better knowing Seth was out there in case I would need him.

The beach was illuminated by the big full moon; the way it sparkled across the sea was breathtaking. I’d gone to beaches in L.A. while I was there, but nothing beat the beautiful beaches of La Push.

I sat in the cool sand with my legs to my chest as I rocked back and forth to the sound of the waves rolling ashore. All my worries washed away with the sea. The salty air made me think of Embry. I imagined him sitting her waiting for me like he always was when I was younger and I’d used to sneak out to see him.

“Naira you shouldn’t be out here this late all by yourself”, Embry said with a stern voice.

I smiled as I curled up next to him on the smooth sand, “I’m not alone; I’m with you”.

Even in the complete dark, I could still see the smile spread across his face. I leaned into him a little more, soaking in his warmth and his scent. Embry always smelled like the beach, maybe that’s why I couldn’t get enough of it, it reminded me of him.

“Don’t you think you should get home before your dad comes out here and kills me”, Embry asked with a chuckle.

“Ugh, I don’t see what the big deal is. I’m safe with you”, I replied with a roll of the eyes. My dad was extremely overprotective when it came to hanging out with Embry. I couldn’t understand it; he never acted that way when I went over to Uncle Jacob’s or any of my Uncle’s for that matter.

“You’ll always be safe with me, but that’s never going to stop your dad from worrying about you”.

“He’s too overprotective”, I huffed. “You’re so lucky you don’t have to deal with that”, I blurted out without thinking.

Embry stiffened beneath me; I’d been so insensitive, “I’m sorry”.

“No; it’s fine”, he wrapped an arm around me to shield me from the light breeze that was beginning to pick up.

“Is it”, I hesitated, afraid to upset him. “Is it hard growing up without a dad”?
I looked up to see Embry looking at the ocean, deep in thought. His eyes glistened as he kept the tears from falling. Suddenly I felt like the most horrible friend in the world, I’d made my best friend cry, “I’m sorry, forget I asked”, I whispered as I hugged him tightly.

“Yes and no”, he answered, ignoring my apology.“There are things that I wish I would have had a father around for to teach me, but my mom did a pretty good job raising me on her own, and I’m grateful for that”, he paused, “I think the hardest thing for me as a kid was knowing that my father was still out there. No child should ever feel the way I felt”.

I wiped a few tears from my face before I sat up to look Embry directly in the eyes, “I’m here for you. I promise I’ll always be there”. He smiled and wrapped me up in his big warm arms. I could still feel the pain that he held within.

I shook my head, pulling myself out of the last “good” memory between Embry and myself. A few weeks after that night was my sixteenth Birthday, the day I turned into the spawn of Satan and treated Embry…. Well, I don’t even want to think about it.

I’d lost track of how long I’d been sitting out there. The breeze was beginning to pick up and the clouds were rolling in. The sea was getting rough; there must be a storm coming. As I stood and brushed off the sand something caught my attention towards the cliffs. I noticed a silhouette standing at the very edge.

I didn’t care who it was, instinct took over and I needed to get there fast. I screamed for Seth, knowing there was no way my little legs would get me there in time if that person was in trouble. Seth’s eye site was better than mine; he would know who was up there. Right before he dashed out of the woods I heard a heartbreaking howl. Seth leaned down at let me climb aboard his back. I held on to a fist full of fur as he raced off through the woods and up the cliff.

As we reached the top I saw Ms. Call standing there in this zombie like state. What the hell was she doing up here?

“Ms. Call, what are you doing”, I asked, stepping towards her cautiously. She was facing the ocean; did not even turn around at the sound of my voice, “Ms. Call let me take you home”, I tried again to get her attention.

She started weeping, “Get away from me. Leave me alone”, she choked out.

“I’m only trying to help; please, let me take you home”.

She slowly turned around, facing me for the first time. I could see her tear stained face; her eyes were puffy from crying, but there was also this fear within them, “I have to; I’m sorry, it’s the only way he’ll leave me alone”.

“Who; who is bothering….” Before I could finish my sentence she was falling back. I couldn’t believe my eyes.

“NOOOOO”, I shrieked at the top of my lungs.

Without thinking of the consequences, my feet followed right behind her; jumping right off this cliff into the frigid Pacific.