Don't Give up on Me

"Have a seat," my father tells me when I return home. My older brother gives me a sympathetic look before he walks upstairs. I start to question whether or not my previous assumption of him not being angry at me was correct.

My dad sits on the other end of the sofa, looking at me without emotion. He opens his mouth to speak a few times, but would shake his head and go deeper into thought.

"Dad, I'm so sorry," I say quietly, unable to bear his silence anymore. "I know that what I did was wrong, and I know its not helping me gain your trust back at all, but I couldn't stay there with Sere-"

He cuts off my nervous rambles with a sigh. "I'm not mad at you. I just don't understand why you left."

"I told you, Serena was the one that ruined my car, egg'd the house, everything that's happened is because of her! Even Zacky and I getting arrested was because of her...." I tell him, crossing my arms on my chest. "Remember why I got suspended from the team? Its because I nearly fought her, Dad, can't you see why I couldn't stay?"

He shakes his head. "I wish you had stuck it out with us. We didn't even have a nice dinner, because we were all worried about you."

"Are you serious?" I ask in disbelief. "You don't believe me?"

"That's not what this is about, because Serena admitted that she wasn't fond of you," he sighs. "But part of growing up is dealing with people you don't like in a mature way. Running away just proved that we've got a long way to go until I can trust you."

I felt tears prick my eyes. "Dad, if I had stayed, there would have been a huge confrontation between us-"

"Only because you would've allowed it to escalate that quickly," he cuts me off. "I'm done with this conversation for tonight. Go to your room."

"Dad, please," I plead, but he only shakes his head and leaves the room.

Stunned, I slowly walk upstairs, completely disbelieving how the conversation went. An hour ago, he seemed calm and collected; now, he was angry and distant. Sad and mystified, I mechanically take a shower and dress for bed, not even caring that it was nine oclock. At least my dad couldn't complain that I stayed up too late on a school night.

Speaking of school, we only had one day of it this week and needless to say, this day was just about pointless. Thanksgiving was this Thursday, and since my dad was working at the restaurant the day of, my brother and I were going to order take out, and lots of it.

Anyways, I was dressed and ready to leave for this dreaded day when I got stopped by my father. "Straight home after school, Andi."

"I know, I know," I sigh, then finally leave the house. Zacky gave me a few looks on the way to school, obviously wondering how the 'talk' with my dad went. I shrugged it off; I couldn't be bothered to talk about it right then. He doesn't press it, though, even after we got out and made our way to the courtyard to meet everyone.

Charlotte immediately pulls me aside with Violet on her trail. "Serena is looking for you, and let warn you, she's pissed off more than usual."

My eyes widen. "What?" I ask, though I fully comprehended what she was saying.

"Read this," Violet says, handing me her cell phone. Serena's Facebook profile was pulled up, along with a status I assumed was about me, and what happened last night.

"The bitch can't even face me when we run into each other outside of school. How pathetic. I'll make sure I find you before 4:00 Monday afternoon," her post read, and tagged right along with it was my own profile that I rarely used.

I grit my teeth. "I will fully explain exactly what happened during 2nd period, alright? But it just so happens that I have Green's class in ten minutes and if I'm late again, I'll get suspended.."

"Okay," they say together, then walk the opposite way to the second building. Zacky and I fall into step on our way to class, the only sound between us was the sound of the zippers on my boots jingling.

"Something's bothering you," Zacky says, "and you're doing that thing where you pretend its not."

"Its not that big of a deal. Its just Serena. Nothing major," I half lie with a shrug. "I'm just fed up. That's it."

"If you say so," he shrugs, obviously seeing through me. I sigh; my fear of sharing my feelings with people seemed to hold me back more than I had originally thought.

"Zachary, Andria, nice of you to join us before the bell for once," Mr Green says, and I have to resist rolling my eyes his way as I make my way to my seat.

Green passes out a new assignment as soon as the bell rings. "This Thanksgiving, I want you all to write about how your family celebrates Thanksgiving. Each family is different, and everyone interprets this holiday in different ways. I only want one page, and it can be typed or handwritten. It will be due the Tuesday you guys come back from break, no excuses."

I internally groan. I fucking hated this teacher with a passion.

"Now, let me teach you all about more of Shakespeare's incredible work..."

The relief I felt when the bell rang am hour and a half later was immense, as I ran out without bothering to wait for Zacky and Matt. In hindsight, if I had known that what happened right after I left 1st period would happen, I would have gladly waited for the two slowpokes.

Instead, I ran smack into Serena herself, who pushed me into the nearest room and slammed the door behind her.

"I told you I would find you before 4," she smirks towards me from her position in front of the door.

"What do you want?" I snap, unable to control my temper.

"Way to fucking go for running away last night," she says sarcastically. "Your poor father couldn't even focus on getting to know his girlfriend's children because your ass ran out after we arrived."

"You and I both know that if one of us didn't leave, a fight would have happened. Don't pull this shit on me, Serena, I've got better things to worry about."

She raises an eyebrow. "Oh really? So you don't feel bad that my mother had to close the restaurant early because your father was so keen on finding you? That she, too, was so worried about you?"

I hadn't known that the restaurant closed early all because I ran out... Then again, Serena is notoriously a liar. She had to be manipulating me. "Well, I'm fine, aren't I?"

I move towards the door, my hand twisting the handle open as she says, "Well, your Dad was worried you'd hurt yourself again, like last time..."

I freeze, the door slamming shut again. "How did you-"

"Your father was concerned you'd try to harm yourself, like you had back in Texas," she says in a drippingly sweet voice. "Yeah, I know about that. Two months in the looney bin? Must've been awful, I must say. But don't think for a second that I pity you."

My breath catches in my throat. There was no way my father would have betrayed me like that. Unless...

He had told Laura and, being the nosy bitch she is, had eavesdropped on the conversation. I tried my hardest not to let my true emotions surface, and instead hardened my expression.

"I don't want your pity. That's in the past, where it will stay, got it?"

"Does Zacky know about your suicide attempt?" she asks, taking a step towards me. "Does he know that you tried to escape your pathetic little life by slashing your wrists? Does he know that you're not nearly as perfect as he thinks you are, Andi? Or are you lying to him, just like everyone else, huh?"

I stay silent, biting down on my lip as I tried to remain emotionless. "Have I struck a nerve, Andi?" she mocks, quoting my previous words weeks before. "I'm more powerful than you think, Andi. I can make sure the entire student body knows of your pathetic little past in less than 24 hours, got it?"

"But why? Why? You've ruined my car, my fucking house, my own father hates me because of you! Why do you choose to make my life hell?" I ask angrily.

"I've already told you- you hangout with the burnouts. I'm here to save the world a favor and make sure you know you're never going to amount to anything," she shrugs, then reaches for the door handle. "Its been fun, but I've gotta get to my design class, the bell's about to ring."

And then she was gone. I too, walk out of the empty classroom into the deserted hallway, the bell ringing loudly above me, although I didn't register the sound. I was in shock, to say the least, and my eyesight blurred slightly, my head pounding.

I only heard someone call my name out once before I blacked out, my entire mind seemingly switched off in an instant.

***************

When I came to, five figures clouded my vision. I blinked a few times, recognizing all of them instantly. The robust school nurse was crouched over me, taking my pulse and making sure I was breathing. Charlotte, Violet, and Jimmy were upright beside her, followed by a concerned looking Zacky. Charlotte brushes a dark curl behind her ear before dropping down beside me, her dark eyes focusing on mine. "Andi," she says when I focus in on her. "Do you know where you are?"

"I'm in school?"

She smiles. "Good, you didn't hit your head nearly as hard as I thought you did. Can you focus on my fingers?"

"Yes," I reply, doing so. She moves her index finger across my line of sight back and forth twice, smiling again when I follow it easily.

"Miss Regan, it doesn't seem like she has a concussion," Charlotte reports to the nurse, who was writing down my information as Violet, Jimmy and Zacky told her. "Should we take Andi back for further evaluation?"

"Yes, boys, can you help?" Miss Regan asks. I soon get lifted slowly off the ground, my head spinning and throbbing as I stand. Jimmy carries my bags while I lean into Zacky for support, unbelievably dizzy.

"Jesus Christ," I mutter as we walk down the hall and into the small room, where I sit on the cracked pleather bed in the far corner. Jimmy places my bags down not too far, then leans against the wall across from me. I put my head in my hands - not out of embarassment, though, it was because it hurt to support it. I still felt Zacky's protective arm around me, calming my nerves slightly.

"Andria, I know it may be hard, but I'm gonna need you to answer a few questions for me, alright?" Miss Regan asks, taking a seat in her office chair and wheeling over toward me, pen and clipboard in hand.

"Alright, these first few questions may be uncomfortable to answer, but bare with me," she warns. I sit up and sigh. "Have you been eating properly?"

I nod. "Getting enough sleep?" I nod again. "Has your menstral cycle been irregular the past few months?"

Ah, the uncomfortable part. Jimmy and Zacky visably cringe and look at everything but me. "No, I just had it actually. Its come on the 3rd of every month since I was 13."

She writes what I said down, then continues. "Have you had any stressful situations recently?"

"Yes," I admit. She scribbles something else down. She asks a few more questions before excusing herself for a moment.

"I saw Serena leave the same room you left, what happened?" Violet hisses. I only shake my head, indicating that I didn't want to talk about it then.

"Well, Andria, you seem to be fine. I think you were just overwhelmed and your body went into shock. Here's an icepack for your head," she hands the towel-wrapped baggie of ice to me, "I can't give you medicine for the pain since you don't have it registered with me, unfortunately. Do you think you'll be able to make it the rest of the day, or should I send you home?"

I felt an internal struggle as I looked around the room. I saw all four pairs of my friends' eyes pleading with mine to stay so they could know what happened. But at the same time, I felt drained, and it wasn't even noon. With a sigh, I reply, "I'll stay," quietly, receiving a pass from her before I was allowed to leave.

"Andi, class is this way-" Violet says when I walk with Zacky and Jimmy the opposite way.

"We're not going to class," I say over my shoulder, leading the way to the courtyard.

"Fine by me, Algebra blows," Charlotte says happily, skipping ahead of us.

"What happened back there, Andi?" Zacky asks into my ear as we walk.

I shake my head again. "You'll know in a few minutes."

We reach the same courtyard from this morning, sitting in a circle on the grass. I sigh, glad to not be walking anymore. I look at all four faces and knew we couldn't leave everyone out, so I pulled out my phone and dialed Matt's number; if I was going to come clean about everything that's gone on in the past 24 hours, I might as well have all of my friends.

Easy as ever, Matt slips out of his own math class and joins us in the courtyard ten minutes later, Brian not far behind him. And again, as I look at all of my friends' faces, I knew that this was the right thing to do. I hated to admit it, but Serena was right: I couldn't keep lying to them anymore. They deserved the truth, they were my friends, after all.

I sigh one last time, then clear my throat, and begin to speak.