Don't Give up on Me

I walked along the beach later that day, my stomach filled with nervous butterflies as I went to meet with Zacky before his shift at the hardware store. I kept running a shaky hand through my hair, a habit of mine when I was uncomfortable.

I decided that I wasn't going to tell him about the dream. I didn't want to make a fool out of myself, nor did I want to even really talk about it anymore. The only thing I did want to talk to him about was our relationship. Now that I knew what I wanted, I was taking Charlotte's advice and taking charge-- even if I felt like puking from how nervous it made me.

I reached the part of the beach where we were meeting at and sit on a piece of driftwood, staring at the waves rolling lazily into the shore in an attempt to calm myself down. I knew it was just my overly-paranoid and pessimistic nature getting the best of me, yet I couldn't seem to shake it off, only making me more anxious and frustrated.

I felt calloused fingers brush against my shoulder suddenly, making me jump slightly. Zacky gives me a look of confusion as he sits beside me, nudging me playfully. "What's up, Andi?"

"We need to talk," I say bluntly, not making eye contact with him.

"About...?" he asks as he lights a cigarette, only reminding me that I left my own back in my car.

"About us..." I trailed off, looking down at my hands clasped together in my lap.

"What about us?"

"Well, what are we doing?"

"Not this again.." he mutters, taking a longer drag of his cigarette.

"What is that supposed to mean?!" I ask, though he stays quiet. "Tell me, Zack."

He groans. "It means that we've had this talk a million times, Andi."

"Maybe this will be the last one," I mutter under my own breath, already hating the direction this had taken.

"You're the one that wanted to talk, so talk," he says indifferently, taking another drag of his cigarette before putting it out.

"I want to be something more serious with you. But with how you just reacted, I don't think this is gonna happen anytime soon," I snap, unable to hold his gaze anymore out of anger.

"W-what?" he stutters out, taken aback. "What do you mean?"

I take a deep breath. "I want something more. I'm tired of doing this 'almost-but-not-quite-there' bullshit. I have feelings for you, Zacky, that's obvious; I just don't know where to go from here, especially since this seems to be working for you. I mean, if you don't want this, then I won't-"

"Andi, babe, chill,"he says, interrupting my slight babbling. "You're thinking too much into this-"

Yeah, well, so would you if you said "I love you" in a dream when we're not even really together.

"And worrying way too much. I'm sorry for saying what I did, earlier, by the way," he sighs at the end, putting his arm around me. "You do know how crazy I am about you, right?"

He just had to say that, didn't he? "I think I have an idea."

"Then you also know that I'd be an idiot to turn you down, right?"

"I mean, if you want to go that far, then by all means..." I murmured, making him smirk.

"Then I think you know my answer," he says casually, as if he hadn't just changed everything between us with those few simple words.

"Really?" I ask, smiling up at him. He laughs as I basically tackle him into the sand behind us before I give him a kiss, and a second, a third, until the sound of a disgusted woman with her kids blunt complaints about us made me stop, though I was relunctant.

"You know, if I'm being honest, I literally thought you were about to kill me," he says, grinning underneath me. "But I'm glad you did that instead."

"Imagine that woman's complaints if I had tried to kill you, though," I say, and we both laugh at the thought. " 'Oh, come on, could you kill him at your house? There are people here.' "

" 'Kids, don't stare, they're bad influences.' "

We both laugh again as I climb off of him. I sit beside him in the sand, though I had my back to the water while he faced it. "So, let's recap what just happened. I became your girlfriend, and then I hypothetically killed you in front of innocent children."

"Sounds like a normal Monday night to me," he shrugs, then checks the time. "God damn it."

"Work?" I guessed; he nods. "Bummer."

"Yeah, well, I'm 40 bucks richer from stocking shit and making keys, so its not too bad."

"Stop trying to make yourself sound cool. You're still the bitch boy."

"I actually got promoted to sales associate."

"Whoa, that does make you cool! I take back what I said, cool guy!"

"You know, if you weren't cute, I just might have been offended," he says, kissing me lightly. "I'll see you later."

"Okay," I say as we both stand. He walks me to my car and kisses me again, making my head spin before he lets me go and leaves, leaving me breathless as he walked to his own car and drives off.

"CHARLOTTE," I nearly screamed into the phone as soon as I was safe inside of my car. "Guess what?"

"You finally beat that level on Candy Crush?" she asks.

"No, sadly," I replied genuinely. "I'm um, off the market."

"Shut up! You actually took my advice? You never take my advice!" she exclaims, making me laugh. "You should come over and tell me what happened. Plus, you know, we need to do our stupid history project because its due soon and you and I both know if we're too lazy to do it now, we won't at the last minute either."

"Sounds good. See you in a few."

I sent a text to my Dad letting him know that I was heading to Charlotte's before tossing my phone in the armrest compartment I partially leaned on before driving off. Arriving at the large, familiar brick home, I parked by the curb, grabbed my phone, and went inside without knocking; Charlotte's parents were very friendly people and didn't mind at all, as long as I said hello. And after a quick conversation with Charlotte's mother, I went upstairs and kicked off my shoes as soon as I was in her room.

"Cookie? They're chocolate & peanut butter chip," she offers, holding the cookie-filled plate. I grabbed two and sat beside her at the head of her queen sized bed.

"So you actually listened to me and got Baker to commit. I'm proud of you," she says after chewing on another cookie. "Take these from me; I've had six already and if I don't stop now I'll regret it later."

I take the plate and balance it on my lap. "I thought I was gonna die, Charles. I was that nervous."

"You know, for a confident person, you worry an awful lot."

I shrugged. "He's literally the only person that can make me as nervous as he does."

"With good reason to. He is your boyfriend after all," she teases, and I felt my face flush slightly as I laughed. "You really don't know how happy I am for the both of you. My best friends are growing up--" she wipes away a fake tear "-- and I feel like the proudest mum in the world that he picked out someone nice for once."

"Mum?" I question, raising an eyebrow. "I think you got into Violet's stash again, Char."

She sighs. "Yeah, that's really Violet's thing, isn't it?" I nod in agreement. "Maybe we should start this project now.."

I sigh, but immediately start to help her with our presentation over the U.S.'s involvement in both of the World Wars. Snoozefest? Yes, especially since I've had to do something related to this since the seventh grade. But, I still made sure our PowerPoint looked and sounded good, while she put together a professional sounding essay. Within an hour and a half, we had our final project of the year before exams started done.

As I shut her laptop down, she lays back on her mattress and sighs. "As much as I adore you, Andi, let's never do this again."

I laughed as I gathered my things, which weren't many, so I was done fairly quickly. "Agreed. I'm gonna head out, love ya dollface."

"Love you too! Drive safe, its dark out," she calls as I put my shoes on.

"Shit, I forgot my glasses," I groaned; I hardly ever wore them, since I needed them for driving, but since I didn't bring my bag, they were sitting in my room rather than my car.

"Are you going to be alright?" she asks, genuine concern in her voice.

"Yeah, it's just a ten minute drive. I'll be fine. See you tomorrow."

After turning my brights on along with my headlights, I carefully drove home in the dark night. Ominous dark clouds covered the sky, and a rumble of thunder forced itself to be heard every few minutes. I loved thunderstorms, they always seemed to help me sleep, as crazy as it sounds. But, driving in them was a nightmare, so I was more than glad that it had barely started to sprinkle as I parked in my driveway, breathing a sigh of relief that I had made it home alright.

"Hey, you're ho- whoa, you seem happy," Ryan says from in front of the tv in the living room.

I give him a smile. "It finally happened."

"Andi, please, if you lost your vir-"

I throw a pillow at his face, hitting him dead on. "No, Ryan, wrong boyfriend."

"Boyfriend? Wait, boyfriend?"

I nod; I guess I'm in a bragging mood, I think before I say, "Yep."

He stands, rolling up the sleeves of his flannel shirt. "Where are you going?" I ask.

"I need to talk to Baker for a moment."

I roll my eyes. "He's working, Ryan, Jesus Christ. Go back to watching Breaking Bad."

"Tell him he and I need to talk."

"Please don't start another argument, Ryan, you're not my Dad. Which, speaking of, where is he?"

He sighs. "Fine. And he's with Laura at her place."

"No surprise there," I mutter under my breath. "Goodnight, Ryan."

"Goodnight," he calls as I walk upstairs. After showering, brushing my teeth, and getting dressed in the biggest t-shirt I owned, I walked into my room, turned a single lamp on, and sighed at the book Mr Green had assigned for us to read: Oliver Twist, by Charles Dickens. A classic read.

But, the thing is, I knew Zacky wouldn't read it unless I was wrong about his disinterest in the novel. And he usually copied off of me for the reading assignments, so I knew I was going to be forced to.

Zacky. My mind quickly replayed the nights previous events, in turn making my heart beat erractically and a large smile of realization form on my face. We're together. This isn't a joke.

My eyes landed on the book again. I needed to read this. But, sleep called my name. It called, it sang, it was pulling me in. My laziness was kicking in, and honestly, I hated Mr Green. I couldn't wait for my last day at Huntington Beach High just so I could rub it in his face that I graduated from the school, even though he probably counted on my friends and I to drop out.

So, I tossed the book onto my floor, shut off my light, and crawled underneath my duvet, falling asleep to the sound of the storm overhead.