My Dad, My World : The Battle

the porch had become my safe haven in this Chaotic world that I couldn't escape. Being violently but proudly sucked into this whole thing was making me sick to my stomach. sam had texted me back just a few seconds after i had. An excited "I'm on my way! :D " vibrated in my hands. Another wave of guilty nausea washed over me and made a deep pit in my abdomen. I've been neglecting the only person I should have been pulling closer as my dads disappearance dragged on. But instead I insisted on being alone. And being alone in a world like this is something no one should have to endure.

now I was just waiting. He should've pulling up any second. For a moment I was thankful that I didbt have any friends. Less hearts to crush when I make the decision to "be alone"

the sun above me was warm and inviting. My mood was heightening by the second for the first time in a long time.

finally Sam pulled up to Aarons house and I waisted no time

jumping up almost tumping my plate of breakfast all over the porch. I ran to Sam like never before as he did the same, jumping out of his car, tripping smoothly without caring to brush it off like it never happened. He just kept moving to me. I admired his appearance . Though haggred and tired, still beautiful in every way possible.

again the pit in my stomach deepened because of the mental and physical pain I had put him through during my pouting time. We collided then and I swear that this pulse of energy jolted through me as we touched. Not that jolt of love and happiness that i usually got around Sam, but a creeping paranormal jolt that I hoped but knew somewhere inside me wasn't negative.

sam pulled back quick and the expression on this face was a mixture between of hope and fear.

"Did you see that?!" He asked.

"See what sam?" I returned.

" this image....your...it was him!" He shouted. Sam was distant now, looking past me to somewhere else. I reached up a freezing hand from the sudden energy and stroked his face, trying to soothe him.
beads of sweat began to drip from his forehead and his face blanched so fast that i knew he was going to faint.
"AARON! HELP!" My voice was so hoarse, surprising because i havent said a word for several days. Aaron got there just as Sam feel to his knees. Thankfully we got him before i feel to his face and we carried him inside, laying him on the couch.
"What happened?" Aaron asked slowly. Different for him, i thought, considering seeing him on the show. A sence of pride arose for my Aaron. i smiled softly to myself but continued telling him.
"When we hugged, this massive wave of energy just ran me over. But then Sam asked me if i saw something but i didnt see anything. but he never answered me when i asked what he saw. all he said was 'it was him.'".
Aaron nodded and ran to the kitchen grabbing micelanious things from the cabinets. all went silent a light whisper broke the silence.
" one by one...one by one..." this voice was not mine, nor Sams nor Aarons. this voice was in my ear, right behind me breathing down my neck and sending evil chills down my spine.
Aaron was back with his water and he dabbed some on Sams forehead. I clarified this as holy water. but then aaron took a glass of water and slowly drizzled it over Sams face. thankfully Sam awoke, his eyes pink from exhaustion. for the firstt time in since i recieved my gift, it felt like that biggest burden ever.
I sent a silent prayer up to Persephone and put my ahnds on Sams chest as his eyes opened further. A sudden realization came over him and he remembered what just happened two short minutes ago. he sat u, looked at Aaron and then to me. He grabbed my hand and spoke softly.
"it was your dad."

********************

the sun was going down now and we all agreed that being in the outdoors might do us good . we chose to have a campfire and as the nevada heat lowered we knew it was a good choice.
the excitement of it gave me the opportunity to calm mysself and have some good vibes get through to me. get through to us. i took the liberty of preparing everything. hotdogs and hamburgers to grill for dinner,some vegies, seasonings,things that were making my mouth water and my stomach to die of hunger. but most importantly i grabbed the marshmelloes fromt he cupboard as well as the gram crackers. then i went to my room and grabbed a few hershey bars from my secret stash in the room i was staying in that i had baught incasse i need a "chill pill".
Sam helped me by getting the wood from the basement,chairs form the garage, and blankets for any possibilities of star gazing when it gets dark. thankfully aaron llives on the perfect edge of las vegas to be able to tone down the lights because he was juuuust far enough away. the finishing touch was to call up the rest off the family to make an evening out of our efforts. Nick, his wife and his daughter, billy and his wife and gracie who had been staying with him since aaron had a small alergic reaction to animals. also Jay who brought his sister erika.
as the night progressed, so did the fun. as of now, we were alll huddled together around the camp fire listening to Nick who strummed delacately on an old accoustic guitar that dad had gooten him for his birthday about 8 years ago.
sam and i chose to sit on one of the many blankets. we both sat towards the callming fire, me between his legs and his holding me tight. my famil singing and roasting marashmelloes and being happy like we all dad would want us to doing, and ive never felt so safe.
this is how it shoudl always be. we shouild always be celebrating hope, not ruining our well beings over it. we would find dad. Especially when aarons head dropped and his hands lay on his knees palms up, and he spoke silently into the night, "i wish Zak was here..."
Even More Especially when everyone else did the same and bowed their heads and sang silent hums of agreement.
Sam kissed my cheek and fir a moment i pictured dad doing the same to me when i was little. my eyes pricked with tears and my head sank as well. i put my hand on my heart, a quiet promise to dad. all the words in my head couldnt even begin to say how sorry i was that he was in this situation. but if theres anything that i could let him now that i know would be the greatest problem is this...
Giving Up is Not an Option.